I am all in a sea of wonders

evening request part 1: Angua and Sam Vetinari and Granny Weatherwax (two separate requests, but I wish that these two meet ♥)

Terry Pratchett really knew how to make het ships, huh?

refs under cut

thinking about how the watch books and the moist books are all about the city, and what would happen if it was moist given charge of the city watch and vimes working in the post office. the easy answer is obviously that it wouldn't; lipwig's heart lies in selling sizzle, whereas vimes' primary interest is ascertaining where the sausage was on the night in question. but i'm compelled by moist looking at criminality from the other side - it's the same thought process, but the criminal should end up inside the cell, the patrician beams - suddenly faced more often with the consequences of petty crimes, with the victims, with the messy nasty aftermath. vimes, drunk and depressed in a dead-end job in the post office, which no-one uses or respects anyway, seeing the next postmaster die and hearing about the clacksmen dying and deciding: no more. moist would think carrot was his parole officer; vimes would struggle, somewhat, with a nine foot man of clay hiding the bearhuggers all the time. the watch would be shiny and sexy and the post office wouldn't be, not at all, but there would be a very angry man hauling letters about the place, mumbling to himself about setting them on fire because he's not having someone else's words in his damn head. the summoning dark wouldn't like lipwig; he knows its tricks. moist wouldn't arrest an army, or the patrician, because he doesn't believe in the law that way, but he'd talk everyone into such confusion that they'd forget what he was ambassadoring for in the first place. vimes wouldn't race the clacks, but he'd check the vault for gold properly when he took on the bank and get its previous owners arrested, causing widespread chaos and giving lipwig a headache. it'd work out of sheer bloody-mindedness and love of the city and it would shake out all wrong - but it would shake out nonetheless.

also lipwig would think it was so funny, being head cop, and vimes would love playing with trains. they deserve that.

drumknott enters silently after the commander leaves. he deposits a folder on the patrician's desk, helpfully angled to catch the light on a relevant name, and then respectfully drops back. "sir, the postmaster is waiting outside with further complaints about stamp theft, obstruction, and people telling him he can't abolish unfair interest rates. he appears to be discussing his grievances further with the...intense young man from the times, who always has such interesting ideas about the future of the city."

the patrician, noble head buried in his stately hands, makes an unhappy little groaning noise.

drumknott shifts uncomfortably, and then elects to go out on a limb. he does not often, but then, it is a strange new world. "do you ever feel, sir, that perhaps there are people in this city not best suited to the role they hold?" he inquires conversationally.

slightly muffled by despair, lord de worde replies: "all the fucking time, drumknott. all the fucking time."

Drawing all of the flowers was both extremely tedious and extremely fun

This year i’m in a romantic mood, so please welcome my little project - drawings of my favorite fandom pairings! First are Lady Sybil and Sam Vimes

I spent a lot of time working out what Vetinari is. Vox Populi and Vox Phantasma - now those are easy. But what is Vetinari the voice of? The voice of the city? not really. He's just the voice of Vetinari, really.

Alright, I will start with this one then - everything starts with the glorious revolution and everything starts with the night watch 🌸

happy glorious 25th of may

Every step I choose to take begins to set the world aflame!

And the soldiers march behind me,

I can hear them beat their spears!

And for the first time in all my life,

I know I'm more than what I fear!

"They did the job they didn’t have to do, and they died doing it ... ... They fought for those who’d been abandoned, they fought for one another, and they were betrayed."

"In memory of John Keel, a man who in a few short days changed the lives of many and, perhaps, saved some sanity in a mad world."

once again unequivocally lost in the sauce at the implication that younger vimes suspects that john keel!vimes is his dad who left when he was young. my favorite subtext of night watch i love the way it just sits there just out of focus

when sam says here's your hard boiled egg i bet you like your toast cut into soldiers and the yolk still runny. because i do. thats the culmination of 'this strange man looks like me and looks at me like he seems almost afraid of me, took me under his wing over every other person in the watch house and acts protective of me even when he doesn't need to. he just came in from pseudopolis but knows this city too well to be anything but a local. and not from the nice part of town, the roughest of the rough part, where i came from, too. he asked after my mum but blew me off when i told him she wanted to meet him. he asked after my dad and looked distinctly unsurprised to hear he wasn't in the picture. he seems to know what i'll do before i do it. sometimes looking at him is like looking in the mirror. there's a tightly coiled anger in him, i can see it, and it looks like something in me i've felt before. on our first patrol he taught me how to walk. i know him i know him i know him'

Okay but so much of the character of Sam Vimes is influenced by him being a former alcoholic tho. I don’t think it’s possible to discuss his unbreakable moral code without also discussing his addiction.

There is significant parallels between how he does not touch alcohol EVER starting from Men at Arms and every other ways that he holds himself accountable in the books.

One minute late to storytime with his child would be one minute too much, because once you excuse one minute late then you can excuse five, ten, and then fifteen minutes late. -> one drink is too many drinks because one drink « tends to arrive in five glasses ».

« If you do a bad thing for a good reason you’ll do it for a bad one », « If one part of the machine breaks down it all breaks down » and « who watches the watchman? Me. » are all different ways of saying that Vimes cannot allow himself to make even one exception in how he behaves. Will not, yes, and that’s very admirable, but this will not is the result of a CAN NOT because what would happen if he did is not, in fact, unthinkable. On the contrary, he knows very well what would happen if he did break one of his many rules, and this is exactly why he doesn’t break them.

« One drink is one too many » is basically the center of his character’s moral code. And it hits so hard because he’s not being rigid for the fun of it, he’s like that because he knows. It’s a sliding slope and he’s been on it and at the bottom of it and he KNOWS how quickly it slides.

And it’s so interesting to see how he applies that core concept to all other aspects of his life, cultimating into the guarding dark.

And a hard-boiled egg (Please check out my patreon and ko-fi!!!)

who tf let these guys run a city

uhhh so @jackedup180 made THIS fucking inspired post and so I frantically scribbled some shitty doodles last night for it and got carried away because this concept is just… so hilariously solid???? moist von “this might as well happen adult life is already so goddamn weird” lipwig, folks. 

waIT I realise I gave vimes one of john’s dad’s lines bUT I JUST THOUGHT DOES THIS MAKE VIMES BITTENBINDER ADSKSGDJDL

still thinking about the part of jingo where angua is like yeah bc i have dog brain and my boyfriend is really charismatic i kind of have to do whatever he tells me to and for some reason vimes is like damn that’s exactly like me and vetinari

what did he mean by this

the little b plot vimes got in monstrous regiment is so good it's a prime example of him Causing Problems On Purpose like the girls were literally the enemy but vimes liked their vibe too much. angua the whole book running him reports like sir you'll never believe this they got lesbians and vimes is just like fantastic! send them some coffee