[Screenshot of a tweet: The reason RWRB is from Alex’s POV is that Henry’s POV would be 300 pages of Henry wondering what to name their children.]

i’m a simple bisexual. i see a pretty person, i [aggrieved noise]

i made this for the discord but its important

You forgot a step

wymack: andrew and neil? i don’t see it

wymack: 

wymack: oh god now i see it

wymack: abby help i can’t stop seeing it

As cat owners we like to joke about how the cat is the one who’s really in charge, but let’s be honest here: my cats think they’re in charge, but they’re also fucking dumbasses. It’s sort of an incompetent-king-and-long-suffering-advisor arrangement, if the king were prone to getting their head stuck in Kleenex boxes.

Me, disentangling my cat’s claw from the blankets for the third time:

@tntwme

By Jan and Odee

some of you have never roasted a cast off son of a yakuza empire so hard that he needed to manipulate you into accepting first row ticket to raven’s line up by using inhumane methods and it shows

Tumblr’s “adult content” ban is the social media equivalent of Kylo Ren firing 500 giant laser cannons at a ghost of Luke Skywalker

Bonus:

kevin, to jeremy: the moriyamas have left me a sad and lonely man jean: hello kevin: this is the sad and lonely man the moriyamas have left me

I think you need to check your blog name, there is nothing incorrect about this

The Foxes as Kermit the Frog

Neil:

Andrew:

Kevin:

Aaron:

Nicky:

Renee:

Allison:

Matt:

Dan:

Wymack:

yknow the more jk rowlings world falls apart in america (race relations, international history, population, etc) the more i like to think that america just straight up doesnt have the statute of secrecy. european countries are falling over themselves hiding magic but come to georgia and theres a drunk redneck wizard wingardium leviosa-ing the shit out of a tractor to the delight of his drunk redneck muggle buddies in a walmart parking lot.

wizard on muggle violence is prevented by virtue of there being like a 50/50 chance that muggle is packing heat. muggle on wizard violence is prevented by knowing that wizard can give you boils spelling LIL BITCH on your forehead if you try to start something.

america is the weird redheaded stepchild of the magic world.

im not gonna stop reblogging this until this is the next Hot Fanon

english muggles come back to england and suspicious wizards meet them at the airport. 

‘did you witness any strange or inexplicable acts while you were in america?’ they demand. 

the english muggles just laugh in their dumb fucking faces. mate, it’s america. 

what’s the difference between a werewolf and an animagus?

english wizard: *two hour lecture on legal history*

american wizard: six beers

@jumpingjacktrash congrats ive read hundreds of comments on this dumpster fire of a headcanon and yours is the best

thank you my patronus is a monster truck

I have reblogged this I don’t even fucking know how many times but I still completely lose it every time I see the words “My Patronus is a monster truck” because that is the most AMERICAN thing I’ve ever seen in 29 years of being ‘merican.

This explains Florida Man.

@the-piece-of-toast

now all I can think of is a Dresden Files/Harry Potter mashup 😂

all the foxes in tkm: neil are you okay

neil: