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#sgjkjgdsgklhfd – @fred-erick-frankenstein on Tumblr
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Pardon, but your tie is not symmetrical.

@fred-erick-frankenstein / fred-erick-frankenstein.tumblr.com

Fred|27|he/him|bi|I'll never tag any of my posts as "q slur", "d slur" or any of that matter - unfollow me if you think IDENTITIES are a slur!|Instagram: @fred_erick_frankenstein|German|icon from a gif by @poirott
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it gets funnier the longer you look

[Start Id : a graph titled "should you bring (blank) to (blank)?" with the categories from left to right reading "a knife fight", "a gun fight", "a wood fire" and "an oil fire", the categories going up and down are "a knife", "a gun", "water" and "a lid".

The first square is in categories "knife fight" and "knife" and is green showing two stick figures holding knives, about to fight.

The second square is in categories "gun fight" and "knife" and is red. It shows two stick figures, one holding a knife and one pointing a gun at the other.

The third square is in categories "a wood fire" and "knife" and is red. It shows a stick figure, fruitlessly, stabbing a campfire. The stick figure is saying "ow ow ow"

The fourth square is in categories "oil fire" and "knife" and is red. It shows a man stabbing a stove. The stick figure is saying "ow ow ow" and the knife is making the noise "scrape scrape"

The fifth square is in categories "knife fight" and "gun" and is green. It shows a stick figure aiming a gun at another stick figure who is holding a knife. The stick figure holding a knife is saying "dude!"

The sixth square is in categories "gun fight" and "gun" and is green. It shows two stick figures pointing guns at eachother.

The seventh square is in categories "wood fire" and "gun" and is red. It shows a stick figure shooting a camp fire. The gun is making the noise "blam blam blam"

The eight square is in categories "oil fire" and "gun" and is red. It shows a stick figure shooting a stove. The fun is making the noise "blam"

The ninth square is in categories "knife fight" and "water" and is red. It shows a stick figure throwing a bucket of water at a stick figure holding a knife.

The tenth square is in categories "gun fight" and "water" and is red. It shows a stick figure throwing a bucket of water at a stick figure holding a gun.

The eleventh square is in categories "wood fire" and "water" and is green. It shows a stick figure throwing a bucket of water at a campfire. It puts out the fire and makes the sound "sploosh"

The twelfth square is in categories "oil fire" and "water" and is red. It shows a stick figure throwing a bucket of water at a stove. It makes the flame larger and makes the sound "foom"

The thirteenth square is in categories "a knife fight" and "lid" and is red. It shows two stick figures. One is holding a knife and the other is putting a pot lid on it's head.

The fourteenth square is in categories "a gun fight' and "lid" and is red. It shows It shows two stick figures. One is holding a gun, and the other is putting a pot lid on the gun.

The fifteenth square is in categories "wood fire" and "lid." And is red. It shows a stick figure placing a pot lid on a campfire. The life does not affect the fire.

The sixteenth and final square is in categories "oil fire" and "lid" and is green. It shows a stick figure putting a pot lid onto the pot on the stove, and putting the fire out. End id]

Thanks for the ID!!!

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batfamfucker

We don’t appreciate the fact that Bruce Wayne is a Kardasian level celebrity enough. Everyone knows him. I want more one shots and crack fic moments where the League (Pre identity reveals) just openly talk about Bruce Wayne in front of Batman.

Just imagine them playing fuck, marry, kill with famous actors and such and throwing Bruce into the mix. And Batman just sits there, silently suffering as he listens to the reasons why Flash and Lantern would marry, fuck, or kill him. He prays they choose kill. They don’t.

Barry: Eat the rich!

Bruce: Oh thank Go-

Clark: Oh, I intend to 🥴🥵

It’s Batman’s turn. Bruce needs to decide whether to marry himself for the money or throw himself off the cliff.

Okay but can you imagine what kind of identity reveal situation that would be?

“I would fuck —-, I would marry —-, and then I would commit suicide.”

“Batman, that’s not how the game is played. You have to choose for Bruce Wayne.”

“I did.”

“…WHAT?!”

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lynati

“I would kill Bruce Wayne just to get him out of this conversation.”

This works best if the reveal comes after literally everyone else has played, and half of the people have said “I’d marry Bruce Wayne for the money” and the other half have not only said that they’d fuck him, but been reasonably graphic as to how.

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althor42

Flash: So, tall, dark, and scary, what’ll it be? Are you going to marry Bruce Wayne so he can fund all of your sick gadgets? Maybe you’ll be a gentle lover to him like Aquaman here, work him over like a hunk of meat like Supes? Or maybe Brucie is the one person in the world you break your code for. Come on, what’ve you got for us?

Batman: -pauses- Honestly, I don’t think there will ever be a better time for this. -pulls off his cowl-

Justice League: -horrified screeching-

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greta: *wake up in the middle of the night and sees brahms creeping*

brahms:

[video description: a Tiktok video by "fairhopeherps", showing a person with red shoulder lenght hair with black wing eyeliner, laying in bed and hiding behind their blanket, captioned "me @ 3am". The camera pans over to the door, where the same person stands, pressed to the wall, captioned "the demon in my corner". A voiceover says: "Baby, I'm not even here". Suddenly the red-haired person gets edited to look like a whirl, continuing: "I'm a hallucination". The video ends with white font on black background, saying "Margo and Ryleigh ☀️ @ fairhopeherps". /end ID].

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leofitzo

he’s trying to use a fucking Tide pen

[ID: three gifs from the movie "Deadpool", showing Wade Wilson aka Deadpool, a white man with burn-like scars on his skin, wearing a blue pullover and a colourful baseball cap, and Blind Al, an old black woman with grey hair and sunglasses, wearing a purple pullover, in a laundry shop. The first gif shows Wade, trying to draw over a blood stain on a pullover with a pen. The second gif shows Blind Al, sorting her laundry, saying: "Seltzer water and lemon for blood. Or wear red, dumbass". The third gif shows Wade, looking thoughful, his eyes going from left to right, the red pen still in his hand. /end ID].

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letmeliedown

dreamed of an image macro with the top text I KNOW ALL THE STEPS & bottom text BUT POORLY over goofy looking animals

yes yes yes oh my god

[image description: a series of photos of animals with the text "I know all the steps, but poorly" over them, as described above. The images in order, are:

A kitten stuck in a couch

A heron with a snake wrapped around its beak

A mountain lion flailing in a pile of leaves

A cow stuck halfway over a gate

/end of description.]

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oh noooooo this is so mean and hilarious

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super-queero

When people ask me "what I am" I give them a 1 word answer and then ask them what THEY are. The fact that someone would ask them their gender and not just know based on how they present FUCKS THEM UP for the rest of the day and I love it.

You can tell it's the first time they thought about their own gender. Fun.

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