Ranking the TNG crew solely on how likely they are to fuck their clone

7. Picard. Not only would NOT fuck his clone but would admonish anybody that was trying to. He’s not generally anti horny rights but he is in specific situation where too many Shenanigans are involved. This makes him a great foil to Q.

6. Worf. Is a little weirded out by others wanting to fuck their clones when you can FIGHT your clone!! That’s the ultimate battle, PLUS it lets you outwardly deal with some of your inner turmoil. Thinks that anyone who choses fuck over fight is a coward and a fool. The fighting CAN be interlaced with a bit of eroticism but that’s not the POINT of it. 

5. Data. It’s not that he’s fundamentally against fucking clones or even specifically his own clone, but there’s enough bad associations with Lore that he generally avoids people with the same face as him.

4. Geordi. Is completely neutral on clone fucking. Not against it, not for it, whether or not he would fuck his own clone would depend on the circumstance really. No matter what would get permission from Data, his husband, first.

3. Bev Crusher. She’s a Milf and she knows it. She’s not gonna actively seek out out fucking her clone but she sure as hell isn’t gonna avoid the oppurtunity if it comes up. Scientific curiosity would drive her to do it, let ALONE her inherent sexiness.

2.Deanna Troi: *Deanna troi voice* personally clone fucking has always been a fantasy of mine

1. Riker: Clone fucking is Riker’s end all be all. He specifically joined Starfleet because he heard that all sorts of messy nonsense happens on the Enterprise (he read a LOT of Kirk’s personal logs) and figured getting on that ship was the best way to shoot his shot. As soon as he gets to properly fuck one or more of his clones he can die a happy man according to me just now. 

Bonus: Q. Has fucked his clone, will fuck his clone, can fuck his clone again. Will provide other’s clone to fuck because that’s how pro clone fucking he is. Is pro horny rights SPECIFICALLY when there’s too many Shenanigans involved, making him a perfect lover foil to Picard.