Crowley: Canon vs Fanon (P1)

Since I got some nice enthusiasm, here it is, Crowley facts ala reality. I’ve noticed there’s a lot of confusing fanon about him and I’m not entirely sure about where some of it came from. It’s fun, but since there’s comparatively little fan focus on Crowley and it’s mostly confusion and wishful thinking, there needs to be someone fact checking this stuff. The other boys have their hordes of devotees, it’s about time the Crowley set got organized. So let’s start with powers and abilities.

Despite fans frequently assuming he does in fanfic, fan art, recaps, meta analysis, and idle wank, Crowley’s never been shown in canon to have:

Superhuman Strength

I honestly don’t know why so many fans assume Crowley has super strength when he’s never displayed anything resembling it. Perhaps because demons and monsters in so many other shows do?

Whatever the reason, the idea that Crowley can break someone with his bare hands is based on not a damned thing in canon. Most demons aren’t stronger than their meatsuits. Some ancient, powerful demons are exceptions, but Crowley isn’t.

This is why he tends to rely on his magic, the element of surprise, and various weapons for when he needs to go full Pesci on someone. Every time he’s gone hand-to-hand with a strong fighter without these things, he’s lost.

Accelerated Healing

When I asked fans why they think Crowley is a super-fast healer, they pointed to his lack of lingering cosmetic damage from episode to episode, ignoring the times when Crowley did show lingering signs of cosmetic damage (like between “Devil May Care” and “Slumber Party”).

Or the fact that Sam and Dean – two characters who obviously don’t have super-healing – would be nothing but scar tissue by now if the show never let their cuts and scrapes vanish through the power of TV magic. Also, we now know Crowley employs witches who can repair and even resurrect his meatsuits, so… yep.

Anyway, I could go on and on about fan-assumed swag Crowley doesn’t have in canon, so let’s talk about powers and abilities he does have:

Scary Good Hearing

Used conspicuously in “Blade Runners”. Twice. No one noticed.

Well Read Like a Mofo

For some reason, a bunch of fans have been insisting for the last few years that Crowley’s vast knowledge of languages, witchcraft, history, and religion is the result of him being more than just a demon. They say he must be an angel. Never mind that being an angel didn’t guarantee that Cas would know the forbidden fruit was a quince or help Lucifer find a Hand of God on his own.

Crowley’s done all the homework, and now he’s more educated than any other character on the show. I think that qualifies as a super power, don’t you?

– COMBO PACKS –

These ones are self-explanatory.

The Crossroads Suite (teleportation, wish granting, binding kiss)

Boss Ass Demon Powers (psychokinesis, pyrokinesis, biokinesis)

Basic Demon Powers (insanely high pain threshold, blood magic, stealth)

Witchy Powers (serious spell casting, hex bags, sigils)

That’s a lot of impressive powers. Kinda wondering why people feel the need to embellish. Ah, well. Dress for the job you want, not the job you have.

Got a question, disagree with something on the list, or just wanna keep the conversion going? Feel free to hop on! The more Crowley stuff in the tags, the better.

flyingfish1

Most demons aren’t stronger than their meatsuits. Some ancient, powerful demons are exceptions, but Crowley isn’t.

Vague horror at the implication, nay! the unavoidable conclusion, that Ridiculous Plane Demon from 1x04 was one of the most ancient and powerful demons we’ve ever met

But I guess if Ramiel can take up fishing and Cain can take up beekeeping, Ridiculous Plane Demon can take up flying and terrible puns ;)

#early installment weirdness #I know #STILL #c:#spn #spn 1x04 #Crowley #spn demons