i was never the alpha of the house.

“I meant something like that”

It’s a weird life, but it’s where I’m at right now.

• “he never forgets a bitch ever”
• “…and he was almost impressed!”
• “because we’re delta airlines / and life is a fucking nightmare”
• “SCATTER!!!!!!!!”
• “…which is some racist-ass bullshit, but also incredibly well coordinated for a group of thirteen year olds”
• “i’m a little fat girl”
• “the best thing about that was that after that, cars were pulling up and looking over to see who just did that piece of shit move, expecting to see like a 100-year-old blind dog who’s texting while driving and drinking a smoothie, instead they see a 28-year-old healthy man trying his best”
• “and i was the ONE pre-y2k asshole going ‘and also with you!’”
• “Don’t you have to do a shift at school tomorrow?” *drinking like it’s the end of the world* “Ehhhh, I’ll just show a video.” “That’s why teachers show videos?!”