Been on ADHD meds for a week and my brain has been the quietest and calmest it’s been in literal years. It’s not a constant screaming mess of anxious thoughts. I can sit without audio playing for more than five minutes without wanting to have a breakdown.
My anxiety has always been at the forefront of my brain especially because I have aphantasia it’s just my inner voice up there shrieking 24/7 365 so I’ve needed bare minimum a constant stream of audio to drown it out and the last week my brain has felt borderline empty? But in such a good, relief bringing, way. It’s nothing like the slew of anxiety or depression meds I’ve tried that made me feel functionally numb.
I got diagnosed with GAD/Depression in highschool and every mental health issue (and even some actual health issues. Which don’t get me started about the absolute heinous neglect cisfem & especially fem people of color face down in medicine on the regular) have been subsequently pinned on that. I think now maybe the ADHD may have been the primary culprit all along?? Don’t get me wrong I’m not completely “cured” the anxiety is still there but it feels much easier to push aside or talk it down when I don’t feel like I’m constantly being hunted for sport.
Anyway it’s been an unbelievable relief to be taken seriously by my new psychiatrist here’s hoping that we can one day have a system where that is the norm.