She's just like the fucking ocean. She pulls me in close just to push me away and sometimes I get stuck in a wave or two.

Oko Ninjah (ocean)

I went twenty two years without knowing her or seeing her and now it feels like I can't go more than a day without seeing her. Every time we're apart it feels like the sun has been dimmed and colors have gone gray. I need her by my side. She brings me color and light, music and love. No wonder I can't go a day without her.

Oko Ninjah (day)

You are the sweetest taste I know...

Oko Ninjah (7 words of her)

Truth is...

I've never been with anyone but you

But there's no one else I'd rather be with

Because my heart and soul have said that it's just us two

Truth is...

I've loved you since the second we met

You're the only person I know that expects someone to speak

After just taking their breath

Truth is...

I'm sorry if you feel like I was playing games

It's just that I didn't think that you wanted me

I just thought you wouldn't feel the same

Truth is...

You make my head spin

You send both my heart and my soul

Into a fucking emotional whirlwind

Truth is...

I was ashamed of being a virgin

Ashamed of the person that I was

I didn't think I'd be accepted

Truth is...

I'm just trying my best

And I'll love you

As long as this heart beats in my chest

Truth is...

If you can't accept who I am then I guess that we're done

If you can then that's good news because I happen to think you're the one

Oko Ninjah (truth is...)

Oko Ninjah (I fucked up and got horny, my wife isn’t around - shitty poem)

Oko Ninjah (I’m a sad fucking puppy without my wife - shitty poem)

We’re in the same room right now… I’m on my phone typing these words and she’s sitting in a chair, writing with a pen in a notebook. I don’t know what she’s writing but, damn is she beautiful! She is fucking gorgeous. I mean, she’s just breathtaking. Sitting there, writing, not saying a word, with her head at a slight angle - she’s just fucking beautiful. Wait.. She just stopped… I should go.

Oko Ninjah (3/25/2018 @10:31pm)

I want to kiss your fucking lips while I'm between your legs and you're pulling me against you. Like, fucking hell... I want you. And, I want to get lost in you.

Oko Ninjah (confessions from my amateur heart)

There's something about her lips

I honestly can't explain

And the way she moans 'fuck'

Makes me feel some type of way

There's something about her lips

I swear they have to be laced

Because when she pulls me against her body

It drives me fucking insane

There's something about her lips

They're more addictive than nicotine

Because when I'm not around her

I fidget like I'm high on caffeine

But there's something about her lips

Maybe I need some help

Because every time that we kiss

It's difficult to keep my hands to myself

Oko Ninjah (confessions from my amateur heart)

What's the difference between her and everyone else? The difference is that I miss her when she's gone. I even miss her when she's beside me and when we're kissing because I know that the night will eventually end and we'll be apart again. The difference is that when we hold hands, when her skin is on mine - she can let go and I can still feel her on my skin. And don't even get me started on her fucking smile. Because who even has a smile like that? Her smile just brightens up my shitty day. I mean, I could be having the worst day ever and she comes around and just grins... That grin, that simple little thing is this bright silver lining of beauty - I love her smile. And her eyes... Like, fucking hell... Her eyes are beautifully paralyzing. I swear sometimes I can't focus on shit because of those eyes of hers. And there are different colors hidden within them. She has specks of violet and orange. Damn... Her eyes are gorgeous. So, what's the difference between her and everyone else? Why am I acting different? In three simple words: because it's her. Because she is who she is and I absolutely fucking love who she is. That's why... Because it's her.

-Oko Ninjah (confessions from my amateur heart)

I don’t know what love is

I honestly don’t

But if you were ever hurt

I think I’d go mental

I can’t say I love you

I don’t know what that means

But no matter what I go through

I’d like you with me

I can’t say those three words

Because I just can’t define

The way you make my heart hurt

And send a tremor down my spine

I can’t tell you I’m scared

Because if I ever did

I’d say when you’re not there

It’s like my chest is ripped open

See, you spin me in a circle

Yeah, that’s what you do

I see other people

But only really want you

I hate feeling this way

Because I haven’t before

I would never want to stay

But with you, I’d like more

I want the warmth of your hands

And the color of your eyes

But this wasn’t the plan

To fall in love with your sigh

Maybe there’s something wrong with me

I don’t know what to do

Because it’s like I can’t breathe

When I try to look at you

Have you ever felt that?

Like your chest is in knots?

It’s like your heart’s under attack

But then you feel it start to throb

I won’t say that it’s love

Because I know that it’s not

But she is who I think of

Even though I should stop

Love isn’t for me

I don’t deserve that

Just having these feelings

Feels quite bad

You can’t make me matter

You can’t make me care

Because if my heart were to shatter

There’d be no one there

So, I can’t say this is love

But even if it were

I wouldn’t be enough

And I would probably lose her

- Oko Ninjah (confessions from my amateur heart)

Look... It's hard to look at her. It's like I can't breathe around her. But I can feel my heart throb. I mean, how is that even possible? How can she fill my head with a billion thoughts but have me speechless by her beauty? It doesn't make sense.

Oko Ninjah (confessions from my amateur heart)

You don't know... She stole the breath from my lungs by just looking at me. But she gave it right back when I kissed her. That's why I have to kiss her, so I can breathe. Also, she has like, really soft lips.

Oko Ninjah (confessions from my amateur heart)

My mom always said not to have too much sugar because it'd make me hyper and I'd be up all night. She was right. I mean, sugar didn't really do that to me. But you did... You are the sweetest thing I've ever had. Because I am bouncing off the walls from you. I'm up all night thinking of you - craving you. And when I finally come down from your sugar high, it sucks. I just want to overdose on you. You're too rich for my taste buds but it's too late. I'm already hooked. I'm already...fucked.

Oko Ninjah ( confessions from my amateur heart)

It terrifies me... That she makes me feel so much. She has something inside of her. There is something about her, something that I can see that just makes me gravitate towards that. I hold myself back because I shouldn't like her. But I know there is no one else like her. And I'll never be good enough for her but if she did like me back, if she did want me - I would never let her go. Because I know she has something that no one else has. I don't know what that is, I just know that it's beautifully mesmerizing.

Oko Ninjah (confessions from my amateur heart)

Oko Ninjah (confession #4528)

If I could just kiss her another time. If I could just kiss her and not fuck it up, I think then things would change between us. If I could just silence the millions of thoughts running through my head and focus on how she makes me feel and encompass that in my lips maybe then she'd realize how much I want to be with her. Because it doesn't matter what I say, don't listen to what I say because I just bury my feelings with liquor and drugs and sex. But when I'm with her, I want to feel. I want the feelings she gives me, the butterflies in my stomach and the hiccups in my heart. I want to be with her but my words don't match the way I feel, they won't match because I bury them down. I don't like being vulnerable, I hate that. But I just think, I just feel that if I could just kiss her and somehow encompass my feelings in that kiss she would know how much I wanted her, she'd know how much she mattered.

Oko Ninjah (confession #678548009)