because getting angry doesn’t help, or weeping or pleading or just fucking trying to be reasonable. because she lost her face, man. because that had to be like having your identity ripped away. because you’re looking in the mirror and a hideous strangers is staring back. and what would i do if i was her, if i was given that choice? – like there would even be a decision. and getting angry doesn’t bring back her face or unmake the choice that she made. any more than it made a difference when dad wouldn’t get out of bed or when mum just flat out told you that your stuff was needed by somebody else. when the people you need stuff from are more interested in something else.
at some point the stick broke.
there were probably manly tears.
beverley brook may have put me to bed, or it’s possible i might have done it myself, just as i’ve always done.