i prayed to you, cas, every night

AN EPISODE WHERE BILL AND THE DOCTOR GO BACK IN TIME TO MEET SAPPHO

SAPPHO WROTE POEMS ABOUT BILL 100%

OK YOU KNOW HOW A LOT OF SAPPHO’S POEMS ARE ABOUT APHRODITE WHAT IF SAPPHO LITERALLY THOUGHT BILL WAS SO BEAUTIFUL THAT SHE WAS THE GODDESS APHRODITE

“Oh. My God. Oh my God. That’s her! That’s - that’s the original. The original Lesbian, I mean proper Lesbian. The Mother Gay. Oh, God. Oh, God, what am I even gonna say?”

“Your brother Charaxis may be under the hypnotic influence of his alien mistress might be a good start.”

“Can you even imagine what was like to read her when I was a fifth-former?” Bill continued. “Like, finally it wasn’t some bloke whining about why some beautiful girl won’t give him sex, it was ‘sweet mother, I’m too gay to do my chores, blame Aphrodite’ like, honestly? Most relatable thing I’ve read in years.”

“Bill-”

“God, what I wouldn’t give to hear an actual completed poem.”

“Bill-”

“Seriously, what was up with the fragment that was just ‘soda’? Like, did it mean the same thing, or - ?”

“Bill, she’s staring at you.”

And she was. Like a figure out of a painting, white chiton against dark arms, hands hovering above the strings of her lyre, fingertips gently rested on the frame. She was biting her lower lip, and the look in her eyes was one Bill knew immediately - the panicked, exhilarated look of an actual goddess is walking the earth, right now, and holy mother of Zeus am I gay or am I gay?

“Oh my God,” Bill said again, eyes wide. “I’m the original lesbian.”