i feel compelled to write a dumb blonde alex AU where he spends the entirety of the stormbreaker book acting dumb and making sayle + his employees' lives as difficult as he can out of spite. also mi6 makes him a bottle blonde because his life sucks. also he threatens to kill everyone in the building and himself with smallpox because of yassen.
#alex rider#stormbreaker alex rider#dumb blonde alex au#fic ideas#do you see the vision#alex deserves to cause some chaos#as a treat#mi6 removed him from his natural habitat#he's an invasive species and a danger to all. including himself unfortunately#sayle is two seconds away from killing him#yassen is so done#“alex?” *play dumb*#“who's alex?” *not that dumb!*#“my name is felix. which you should know already.” *rolls eyes and walks away*#[internally] what the heck what the heck how am i getting away with this