Dear passengers, please be advised that due to the rain, the airport is wet.

wow! that was a fun accidental 2 hour session of video's game. now to go to the kitchen to check on my pet Pot Of Boiling Water...

it’s almost that time of the year again, so you know what that means

bringing this back for thanksgiving

What if we all fuck argumate’s racist grandma

being a certain gender doesnt make you evil. youre not automatically evil just because youre a man youre automatically evil because of the amulet

So while I was getting my haircut, the lady asked me if I had other plans for the day and I said:

“I’m just going to pick up the boy from daycare and then it’s date night.”

And the lady says “Oh! How old is he?”

“He’s three.”

“Mine too! Where are you registering him for kindergarten it’s such a hassle-”

And that’s when I realized I said “boy” and not “dog” because I always think of Charlie as “good boy” but this slip up has lead to a miscommunication.

The lady is now 6 minutes into a clearly needed rant about how unnecessarily complex shopping for schools is, esp when you have a neurodivergent child, so I can’t just tell her that Charlie is a dog because then she’ll feel awkward for unloading on me and she clearly has enough going on.

So the rest of the haircut became a game of “how much can I say about Charlie without revealing that he is not a human child?” And the answer is “enough to cover a half hour hair appointment, quite possibly several hours worth if I’m specific enough”

“is he very verbal?”

“It really depends on who he’s with. He’s very quiet at he but won’t shut up if he’s at the park or has a friend over.”

“was it hard to potty-train him?”

“he’s adopted, but I was genuinely amazed at how good he already was with hygene and potty stuff.”

“mine’s just obsessed with paw patrol and Frozen, drives me crazy!”

“I imagine. Charlie is colorblind so he’s not as into tv, but he always wants a toy if I take him anywhere with them.”

“oh gosh the toys! And the kids are so rough on them!”

“yeah Charlie can destroy a stuffed animal in about 2 minutes, so I only buy him the really cheap ones.”

“Does he throw tantrums when they break?”

“Not really. It’s meditative, really, taking them apart. He has hysterics if the cat takes his toys though. Runs downstairs and cries at me until I retrieve it because he’s not tall enough to get it out of the cat tree.”

The Very Good Boy in question, Charleston Chew.

(if you want to read more of my much weirder adventures, I have pre-orders for my book on Patreon right now: https://www.patreon.com/gallusrostromegalus )

god I would be UNSTOPPABLE if I was capable of consistently initiating tasks. just you wait. you'll be waiting a while but just you wait

i love tiktok comment sections

Moves at a pace slightly faster than your walk speed but slightly slower than your run speed

Mad because I'm standing in a doorway and my wide collision box won't let you pass

This society teaches from small children that boys and girls are foreign creatures from each other, and then we wonder why misogynists don't see women as people with all the same emotions and thoughts as they have.

They are told that girls are inscrutable aliens, and then we wonder why toxic pick up artists who treat women like video games to win are so successful.

We set them up for expectations that their wife is someone to be used for sex but at best never understood and at worst someone to resent for the rest of their lives, and we wonder why heterosexual relationships are so toxic.

Little boys are told to look up to male superheroes, but that admiring a female superhero makes them a f*ggot. They're told to see themselves in boys in stories, but never in the girls.

We're all fucking people, we have more in common than not, but that's not what we teach children. And we wonder why these problems persist.

Little boys are taught that they shouldn't cry because they're supposed to be "tough." That they should want to grow into being "a man," and "a man" never shows soft emotions. Men can show anger, and hatred, and violence. Men can cheer on sports teams because it's a battle, a contest, but they're not supposed to cry over a sad movie or be awed by an autumn walk in the woods.

Little boys are chastised for wanting to dress in bright colors, or soft colors, or certain clothes. Boys are told they can't decorate themselves. They are scolded for playing with certain toys or having particular hobbies. Their interests are forcibly channeled into a rigid notion of what is Allowed or Acceptable.

Because to do anything not acceptable is to be female, and being female is one of the worst possible fates. Homophobia is misogyny at its root. It's the fear that if you are a man who likes men, you will be treated by men the way that men treat women.

Little boys, older boys, young men, older men, all men should be allowed to be soft. They should be allowed to cry, and laugh, and have friendships, and be vulnerable. None of that is inherently male or female. It's human.

How can you recognize emotion in others if you're not allowed to recognize and acknowledge it in yourself?

We're all fucking people, we have more in common than not, but that's not what we teach children. And we wonder why these problems persist.

if she’s your girl why is she sucking on my ancient coin