☀all calls are troll free☀

This post isn’t written in any known human language

Is this what understanding a newspaper political cartoon is like?

I’ve had enough of this school

wealth!!!

REBLOG WEALTH SOAP IN 10 SECONDS AND U WILL GET WEALTH!!!!!

AYYYYYYE

Deadass tho

i’m very glad i chose to watch this

bye i love this

Man: Siri, what is 1 trillion to the tenth power? Siri: Calculation. The answer is one zero zero zero zero zero [continuing] Man: *starts beatboxing to the rhythm. Woman 1: *joins in* Woman 2: *starts singing to the rhythm*

This is sO GOOD

never gets old

Does anybody remember this “go nuts, show nuts, whatever” gem? Oh how the mighty have fallen.

You either die a hero or live long enough to see yourself become a villain 

goodbye tumblr 

pornhub: the government is doing a bad job of sex education. we’ll do it properly. public: applause pornhub: the government is doing a bad job of snow plowing. we’ll do it properly. public: confused applause

pornhub: chaotic good

what timeline is this

wh….

every single negative stereotype about women was dreamt up by men who were projecting. fight me about it.

“women can’t drive”

It is so well known that women are better and safer drivers than men that OUR CAR INSURANCE RATES ARE LOWER. Women get into fewer accidents, get fewer DUIs, and receive fewer speeding tickets than men.

“women never shut up”

Several scientific studies have shown that not only do men talk more than women, they also think that women have been talking for much longer than they actually have. Men interrupt and talk over women, dominate conversations, and still think women talk too much.

“women are shallow”

Lol next

“my wife is my ball and chain lmao”

Multiple studies have shown that marriage between men and women: Increases male lifespan, decreases female lifespan Decreases male depression rates, increases female depression rates Decreases male stress levels, increases female stress levels Increases male health and happiness, decreases female health and happiness Increases a man’s chance of getting a raise or promotion, decreases a woman’s chances of getting a raise or promotion

“women are too emotional”

Men love to say this about women after hurting them, in order to shift the blame and dismiss their feelings in one go. In reality, women are taught to hold our tongues and control ourselves quite literally from birth. We’re taught to put men’s needs and wants ahead of our own emotions regardless of the personal cost. Men are taught to do more or less whatever the fuck they want to women. Men take their emotions out on women while women are expected to shove theirs down.

I could go on and on but I don’t really think I need to.

for all you pissbabies crying about sources

Is that…, josh peck…

If I don’t see this somewhere on my tl every Friday, I’m gonna be very upset

oh… she can sing

Why didn’t she release this version originally??

because she was 13 and had no control over it and now shes in her 20s lol

every so often tiktok accidentally recaptures that golden era of short form comedy vine could capture

i am incredibly tired of my editing application crashing so take this as it is lol

op marry me i watched this twice and i’m still laughing my a-

*slams reblog*

Klezmer dolphins.

I don’t know that I’ve reblogged anything faster in my entire tumblr life.  

I want to know the story behind this?

Like. Look at the movement of the water. The color. They’re not in a tank. That’s the motherfucking ocean. Or at least, a large closed off area in the ocean. The man in the video is on some sort of raft.

But those dolphins know the dude well enough to beach right next to him, and while I’m no expert in dolphin-ese, I know enough to make a pretty solid guess that those dolphins are trying to communicate with that clarinet (dolphins have their own languages! And I think the fast, lilting notes of the song combined with the clarinet’s natural sound mimics a dolphin’s clicks and chirps pretty well, all things considered)

So what in the Sam Heck is going on here???

Clearly a bard with levels in ranger

Society: A music degree is useless

Me:

how much do i have to zoom in on a pic of my elbow before it gets flagged

never mind tumblr shot me on fucking sight

MOOD