Pumpkin Spice Latte Potter, you were named after the greatest fall beverage in the entire muggle world, and the first thing I'm going to do when you get on the damn train is go get one
englishmajorhumor reblogged
There’s No Need To Call Me Sir Professor Potter, you were named after the sassiest remark I will ever pass in my entire prodigal life. Such unadulterated savagery needed to be acknowledged.
englishmajorhumor reblogged
“Molly Minerva Potter, you are named for two of the bravest witches I have ever known” “But dad I’m a boy” “Have fun at school Molly”
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Doug Dimmadome, Owner of the Dimmsdale Dimmadome Potter, you were named after the bravest man I ever knew
englishmajorhumor reblogged
“Crookshanks Mrs. Norris Potter, you were named after two cats. Goddamn I love cats. Just the way their ears do the thing…. and their little foot pads. Good luck son.”
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aceofsquiddles
“Snape Snape Severus Snape DUMBLEDORE Potter, you were named after the catchiest puppet song I ever heard.”
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foralemondrop-deactivated201806
Scoobert Scooby Dooby Doo Potter, you were named after the world’s greatest dog detective. Good boy, son. Here’s a Scooby Snack.
englishmajorhumor reblogged
Quidditch Misdemeanors Potter, I named you after the only two activities that have ever truly brought me joy in this unending hellscape of a life
englishmajorhumor reblogged
Hagrid Hagrid Potter, you were named after the onLY GUY IN MY LIFE WHO LOOKED OUT FOR ME WITH ZERO ULTERIOR MOTIVES HE LITERALLY JUST CARED ABOUT ME BECAUSE HE WAS A GENUINELY NICE PERSON AND HE DESERVES SOME RECOGNITION FOR THAT
englishmajorhumor reblogged
kili-in-the-shire-with-fili-blo
“Voldemort Umbridge Potter, you were named after the two worst people I know because frankly you annoy the shit out of me”
englishmajorhumor reblogged
Wingardium Leviosa Potter, you were named so that every time a teacher yells at you they’re going to make stuff fly around the room. Your mother wanted to call you Fred, but I thought this would be more true to his memory.
englishmajorhumor reblogged
Hedwig Buckbeak Potter, you were named after some hella winged animals hella rad high five son
englishmajorhumor reblogged
Hagrid Hagrid Potter, you were named after the onLY GUY IN MY LIFE WHO LOOKED OUT FOR ME WITH ZERO ULTERIOR MOTIVES HE LITERALLY JUST CARED ABOUT ME BECAUSE HE WAS A GENUINELY NICE PERSON AND HE DESERVES SOME RECOGNITION FOR THAT
englishmajorhumor reblogged
kili-in-the-shire-with-fili-blo
“Voldemort Umbridge Potter, you were named after the two worst people I know because frankly you annoy the shit out of me”
englishmajorhumor reblogged
the epilogue for the last harry potter book should have just been thirty-year old harry forwarding dozens of cat videos a day to mcgonagall with the caption"is this u" on all of them
englishmajorhumor reblogged
Wingardium Leviosa Potter, you were named so that every time a teacher yells at you they’re going to make stuff fly around the room. Your mother wanted to call you Fred, but I thought this would be more true to his memory.
okay this one is legit hilarious
