Criminal Minds | 4.12 Soul Mates

It’s my grandpa’s birthday next week and he said “I don’t want to be 85” and my grandmother, his wife of 59 and a half years, said “well your only alternative is to die”, I can’t believe how affectionate they are

I was having lunch with them today and my grandpa started throwing napkins at my grandmother, and she balled it up and looked all set to throw it back but then she put it down and said “I will not throw it because I was brought up properly, you were dragged” she has spent ¾ of her life with this man

I thought I’d let you know how they’ve been getting on during lockdown, so here’s some of the FaceTime conversation from today:

“My goodness, the way technology is advancing - in 20 years we’ll be able to shake hands through the screen!”

“Rex, I don’t think we’ll be here in 20 years.”

“Well you can make your own plans, I shall only be 109.”

What’s up friends, it’s been 3 years, grandpa has made it to 88 and they’ve been married 62.5 years! Please enjoy another instalment:

Grandpa: the new packs are.. it’s.. what is it. It self destructs

Grandma : biodegradable, Rex.

Good Omens (2019-)

The Doctor recommends that Seven should get a pet to explore her “nurturing” side. She won’t admit that she enjoys having a pet, but gets VERY defensive when Janeway questions whether a lizard belongs clinging to her shoulder in astrometrics. 

For those wondering, the lizard’s name is “Two of Two.” Initially, Janeway worries that this indicates the presence of another lizard, but eventually it comes out that Seven named him that because they “are part of the same unimatrix in the Voyager collective" 

Thinking of the larger context of LOTR and like, the fellowship swapping old war stories and shit and Sam just says “Yeah I killed a huge spider…Shelob, I think?”

And Gandalf just blinks and is like, “You what now?”

“Yeah, killed it. Had to save Frodo”

Gandalf elects not to tell Sam that he killed the spawn of a primordial demon.

the daughter of the embodiment of darkness which ate the original sun and moon and almost ate the devil.

That's not important. What is important is that it was a danger to Mister Frodo.

I love the scene in feet of clay where the mob is trying to kill the golem and carrot comes in and is like you can't kill the golem and they're like well it's not alive it's property, and he's like ok then I could charge you with destruction of property if you try to smash it, and they're like well I heard a golem killed an old man and he's like well if it's property and not a person then it can't kill anyone, see my sword? Couldn't blame my sword if I stabbed you. Either it's a person and destroying it would be murder or its a thing and it can't have committed murder. And then he walks the golem back to where it works, and the boss tries to turn it out onto the street because he heard that a golem had killed someone, and carrot is like if you do that then I'll charge you with littering. It would be malicious compliance if carrot could be malicious

Discworld Heritage Post

Encanto (2021)

We talk about how quickly Vimes had it down bad for Sybil, but can we also appreciate that five foot nothing of scrawny alcoholic turned up at Sybil's door and she was immediately like "help me with my dragons. let's have tea. did you know my ancestors fucked severely? gosh you're a captain, how dashing." When Vimes was injured she could have had him put in her spare bed but nope, she put him in her bedroom. And then she slapped his arse. Lady Sybil knew what she wanted.

much ado about nothing is so underrated. successfully scamming your friends into falling in love by just gossiping about them really loudly? golden. beatrice friendzoning benedick in front of everyone they know and then confessing her love like two minutes later? hilarious. the friar telling hero to deal with her shitty boyfriend by simply faking her own death? fucking superb. random villain who has literally no motive other than he just wants to fuck things up? phenomenal. there is nothing about this play that is not incredible.

Every Doctor Who Companion

“She is tolerable; but not handsome enough to tempt me.”

Pride and Prejudice illustration based on the book.

do you ever think about how darcy's perspective of the visit to rosings is just... a completely wild time. so like. he and his favourite cousin goes to visit with his weird aunt, and ends up running into this hot girl, that he's really kinda increasingly into? she's staying in the area for a while with her bestie. so like. he was expecting a boring social obligation visit & getting pressure into marrying his other, less favourite cousin. instead, he watches the hot girl hold her own with his aunt in conversation. she banters with him over the pianoforte and they have a Moment™. he keeps going over to the house she's staying at, just to awkwardly chill there, even though he doesn't like the other people there. has a whole conversation with her about how she wouldn't mind living far away from family, as long as she could afford the travel. he extends his visit so he can keep seeing her. when he runs into her on a walk, she makes a point of detailing the exact route she prefers to take while out walking, clearly encouraging him to join her, so he does. he has a really nice time on these walks, they spend a lot of time in companionable silence, but he manages to flirt a little by implying some stuff about the future & what their married life could be like, and they have some conversations about that. and sure, she has some family baggage, but none of them are around so it's a lot easier to ignore, y'know? so eventually he just can't take it anymore, and he shoots his shot. she clearly values honesty so he explains his scruples as well, but he thinks she's been dropping some favourable signals, so he's got a good chance, right?

and then not only she turns him down she ROASTS THE FUCK OUT OF HIM. she insults him. she insults his honour as a gentleman. she flips the fuck out about... oh yeah crap the sister thing, turns out his cousin blabbed, and then I'M SORRY YOU SAID WHAT? ABOUT WICKHAM? THIS IS ABOUT FUCKING WICKHAM, MY FUCKING NEMESIS? HE FUCKING SAID WHAT ABOUT.... OH MY GOD. oh fuck. I've fucked up so badly I need to reevaluate my entire life & risk sending a letter to an unmarried woman who hates my guts, just so i can explain shit. fuck.

AZIRAPHALE & CROWLEY in

GOOD OMENS

2x03 • “I Know Where I'm Going”

WATERSHIP DOWN (1978) - Directed by Martin Rosen