It's hilarious to me that Al Capone was an amazing tipper. I get why it took so long to catch him.

Me and the other caddies watching Al Capone beat a guy to death with a golf club after he gave each of us the 2022 equivalent of $1600

Curved dagger (khanjar) with rock crystal hilt. India, 18th century

i'm not the first person to note this, but imane khelif, in addition to winning a gold in boxing, has also managed the superhuman feat of getting jk rowling to shut the fuck up. i think the ioc should give her another medal.

often i am saying this

this is the single worst way i've ever read to describe an erection, frank herbert

beef swellington

I feel like Joy needs to see this...

@thebibliosphere

What a horrible day to know how to read.

reblogging this with a video example, because the description doesn't do it justice.

absolutely fucking hysterical get vaporized idiot

it's the lack of casual closeness in long distance friendships that kills me. we can't take a walk together, down the road or in a park. can't window shop or run errands. we can't see each other's reactions as we make fun little small talk. that's all i want

If you fucks actually go through with not voting on your next USA president elections and subsequently lead Trump to power again.

Yes. Yes I'm going to blame every single American for that. Collective responsibility and all that jazz.

Explaining in simple terms: if you don't vote for Biden because "he is murdering palestinian babies", you will get Trump as a president, who, being an open and proud islamophobe, will murder even more palestinian babies.

It is no good situation when you have to choose between two shitty candidates. But you have a two-party system.

russia has previously aided trump during elections, and they will do so again. A call to boycott the elections = a call to support trump

You are in no position to afford the privilege of being idiots.

Also this.

Also, a lot of his goons have been filling a LOT of important spots in the military and civilian fields to have positions available for trump to fill in with his loyalists and to easier do a hostile takeover if he wins the election.

IF YOU DON'T VOTE FOR BIDEN YOU WILL GET A DICTATORSHIP BY TRUMP AND WE WILL ALL BE FUCKED

I don't know how many times we have to tell people to make everythingin their power to stop Trump from coming to power again. USA will be fucked. Ukraine will be fucked. Palestine would be fucked. We don't know how many other countries will be fucked.

Trump's presidency already gave cart blanche for the international far right rise, and I don't think we need to spell out to people that the state of the world today is directly credited to Trump's presidency, his incompetence, him being Russian puppet, etc etc.

As much as I am actually an opponent of the whole idea that USA is responsible of everything in the world, it does have a huge influence on international politics scene.

SO GO VOTE.

And since USA is a democracy, then, again, y'all are responsible for the president you elect.

Also, in 2016 Russia went hard on surreptitiously spreading propaganda to get people not to vote for Clinton. We already know that Russia is using bots to spread misinfo about the Israel-Gaza war. I don't think it's a coincidence that we are suddenly seeing tons of posts about how we shouldn't vote for Biden in 2024. You are not immune to propaganda.

This is why I'm always bringing up the nuance. Because Biden and Trump are not equally bad. They are not even in the same orbit of bad.

Biden is a leader too moderate for my tastes, who I really really wish wasn't so old. The things he has done have been unexpectedly good despite being hamstrung by the opposition. Love him? Nope. But Biden is making sucky choices from an array of sucky choices, domestic and foreign.

Trump is calling his opponents Vermin, outright explaining that he is 'retribution' and cracking jokes about victims of political and racial violence. He brags about being the one to kill Roe v Wade. In 2020 he asked why the cops didn't just shoot the protesters in the legs. He wants to deport immigrants, including all dreamers, and his plan starts with 'put them in camps.'

I know most people don't track political news. I get it. Its nauseating. But this idiot's gotten stupider, and he's gotten more hateful.

We are, horrifyingly, going to have to watch another Trump v Biden election barring some act of god. (on Nov 5, jfc) And I will walk you through your specific hesitations about Biden if that's what it takes to get through to you. We don't get to vote for a candidate we love. We get to vote for one who won't actively kill american citizens.

one of my least favorite things is that I can’t teleport

and now, some input from macklemore

but in all seriousness, respect to macklemore for this because holy shit

Tumblr Code.

that way we know we’re from tumblr without revealing anything

I’m just going to say this to strangers until i find a tumblr person

must keep reblogering!! Im going to be so suspicious if any one tells me this now!

Remember the answer is: I stole them from the president.

always reblog tumblr identification

good god this just crossed my dash in the year of our lord 2023

I LIKE YOUR SHOELACES??? IN THE YEAR OF OUR LORD 2024??

Let’s take it to 4 million, folks!

almost there!

TO 4 MILLION!!!!!!!!!

THE ORIGINAL SHOELACES POST?? ON MY DASH IN 2024??

@highladyluck

Gods bless the post. :)

(Remembering with pleasure when I got to do this last year with an auditorium full of people at Finncon in Tampere.)

Poll: if your mom remarries when you’re 26 years old is that guy still your stepdad or is he just your mom’s husband.

The poll winner seems to be “depends on whether you like him” which is super valid.

Mine watches fox news so “mom’s husband” it is!

My family has a great way of distinguishing between a new spouse you like and new spouse you disdain!

Your mom/aunt/grandma/etc remarries and they are actually a cool person, you use their first name. So if you were to introduce them they would be: Aunt Jane and Bob.

If your mom/aunt/grandma/etc remarries and they are a fuckwad you introduce them as: this is Aunt Jane and her second husband. The implication being that they are very replaceable and that we’re all just waiting for her to wise up to the situation and serve you divorce papers, she did it once, she can do it again.

MAGNIFICENT

Alright, but what if my mom on her third marriage found a decent man, but my mother herself is shitty

"my stepdad's wife"

@sapphic-sargent your tags omg

You are doing God’s work

reblog if your name isn't Amanda.

We’ll find you Amanda.

this has almost 11 million notes what is this

I’ve never seen this post once in 10 years on this site

@hellsite-hall-of-fame

I’ve never even heard of this before tho??? Wtf??????????

oh my god, I didn’t think there were any surviving versions of this post left

For those who weren’t around in the Deep Lore times, this is one of the relics of the editable post era. This post has THE SINGLE HIGHEST NOTES of ANY post on this site, bar none, but with more than a dozen variations. Every single post you’ve ever seen with more than 3 million notes has been a different version of this one.

This is the “Dean’s Gym Shorts” post. This is the Flubber post. This is the original “Reblog if you support gay people” post. it was ALL of them. before half the site got nuked, it had even more notes than it has now - at one point, well over 15 million, and that was years ago.

This, with no exaggeration, is the ONE TRUE heritage post

vegans make peace with honey

no shut up do it

vegans will pretend not to hear when natives tell them their agave products are unsustainable because they have whimsical feelings about, and i cannot stress this enough, the freedom of hive insects

Honey is literally murder but go off

Prove it.

They literally puke their guts up to make your honey

I have not seen any evidence tonsugges they are harmed or die in the process of production. They do regurgitate the nectar as part of the process to concentrate it into honey (an interesting process) but they do not suffer any injury during this process. If they did, the cost to produce honey, which is done naturally as a measure to survive over winter and through times of lower availability, would outweigh the benefits. If you kill several bees to produce enough honey to make one more bee, It makes no sense. Any animal that did that would die, even with human intervention.

Do you have any sources which suggest otherwise? I’d be interested to hear of this (relatively publicly available) information was false or misunderstood.

Bee farmers use whats called a honey maker. It’s a crude devices. It similar to a meat grinder. They force the bees in and grind them up. What comes out is a paste. That paste is later filtered into what we know as honey

This is the funniest thing I’ve ever read

@zoologicallyobsessed please show us pics of your bee grinder

they might be falsely thinking about a honey extractor machine. but all these do is you place the beehive frames inside and a motor rotates it at a speed that removes the honey, which is then tapped through a tap at the bottom. 

…do they think they put bees in that and spin them around until they vomit…?

bee carnival

bad and naughty bees get put into the b e e c e n t r i f u g e to extract their honey

Vegans coming after beekeepers is one of my major teeth grinding annoyances. For many reasons, because there’s so many lies. And to go one step further because it’s such a waste. You see, the strongest vegan argument is that they don’t want to exploit animals or take from them without their consent.

… but… Bees consent. NO. I’M NOT KIDDING.

How? Bee hives aren’t kept on leashes. They’re outside, the bees can travel miles every day. They follow their queen. Who is also outside, not on a leash, and can travel miles every day. If she doesn’t like the hive for any reason - for example: it got too hot, too cold, too messy, too filled with sugary stuff and they need more space… then the queen leaves. And with her the hive.

The queen stays in the hive because the hive is the best place to live. Period. Done. End of. If the hive is staying with the beekeeper it’s because the keeper is doing their job correctly and keeping them happy because the bees can, and do, leave bad beekeepers.

Of all the animals we have domesticated as livestock, bees are the ones you can most easily argue are consenting participants in their keeping.

Here it is. The bee post is back

I feel compelled to explain the misconception part for anyone who doesn’t know anything about beekeeping and finds any of this confusing. This might be a little redundant, but I’m scratching an itch.

Bees manufacture honey using pollen. They store it in the cells of their hive, where it’s used as food for the colony, particularly the larvae growing into the next generation of bees.

When you harvest honey, you remove parts of the hive that are being used to store the honey, without taking any bees along for the ride. Those parts of the hive are then put into a device, like the centrifugal extractor shown above by gemstone-gynoid, where the parts are spun really fast to pull extract the honey. The honey gets collected on the walls of the extractor, drips down, and can then be filtered and bottled for human use.

So.

It turns out that bees love making honey and can make more of it than they’d ever need. It also turns out that beekeepers taking care of hives and harvesting their honey keeps bees healthy and thriving, more so than they’d normally accomplish on their own. And we really need bees healthy and thriving because they help us grow an astonishing amount of food by pollinating plants.

Like, there’s no need to have a conversation about this, anyone who claims that harvesting honey requires that you kill bees is lying. Either they don’t know anything about beekeeping and are just repeating a lie someone else told them, or they know that they’re lying and they’re just straight up trying to deceive people. Neither is a good look.

And just one more point of clarification – “cells of the hive” doesn’t mean the anatomical cells of the bees’ bodies, it means the little holes in the honeycomb of the physical structure of the hives, which they build using beeswax. Think of it like a bee pantry. They put their honey in the pantry, but since they’re working hard every day, they often make wayyyyyy too much of it. So the beekeepers come along and take the extra honeycomb that the bees don’t need and aren’t going to use, but they leave plenty behind for the bees to eat. Additionally, if anything happens to the hive’s honey supplies in the winter, the beekeepers can supplement their food by either giving some honey back or giving them sugar water. Also, fun fact! When beekeepers extract the honey from the comb, they often leave all their equipment out afterwards so the bees can come along and clean up, re-collecting any traces of honey or wax left behind, which get put back into the hive and recycled. Any leftover waste (dirt and grime from old comb, for example, or bees that died natural deaths of old age) makes great fertilizer for the plants that produce the pollen the bees make next year. No waste!

Vegans, the bees are not going to stop making honey if they’re left to their own devices in the wild. The bees are just doing a thing that bees do. Eating honey is not exploitation, it’s sustainability. That said, if you’re still worried about the ethics, I’d recommend looking up some local beekeepers/honey farms in your area and reaching out to them for more education! I’ve known a lot of beekeepers that are really excited about doing education and outreach to teach people about the importance of pollinators, the partnership between bees and beekeepers, and the process of how honey is collected. Some honey farms will even give you a tour of their process so you can see in person how it’s made and that it’s not a harmful or exploitative process for the bees at all! (and of course eating local honey gives you an amazing connection to your local environment, both spiritually and physically?? like apparently eating local honey can help with seasonal allergies??? it’s really cool)

“counterspell” or as i like to call it “Nuh uh”

eagerly awaiting the day daniel radcliffe, elijah wood, and robert pattinson just make the most fucked up bizarre unmarketable film together

you get it

hear me out: goncharov reboot