had a bad low blood pressure moment last night and messily asked my partner for saltines and water before realizing i should probably ask for the Blood Pressure Medication I Need To Take. while they went to go grab it though i still had water and crackers so in a daze i took a swig of water but didnt swallow and then tried to cram 2 saltines in my mouth. full of water. in bed. with mouth full of water

Normalize this response

yes or "remind me later" NO LET ME SAY NO I WANT TO SAY NO!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!

every week i get that shitty "Let's finish setting up your computer!" thing when i turn it on and it's SO fucking aggravating because i've been using this thing for years now and i don't need nor WANT to fucking "set it up" (read: use microsoft edge, buy windows office, whatever the fuck else they try to sell me) like i'm very obviously perfectly fine. and i can't just say No because No is a very privileged limited time answer we had in the tech future so now it's always "remind me later" no motherfucker i am adamant in my need to tell you NO. i fucking hate the removal of no from our options and vocabulary. i am expressing a boundary i need you to fucking know i am saying NO

Hit the Windows + I keys together. Go into SYSTEM then  NOTIFICATIONS AND ACTIONS and uncheck  "suggest ways I can finish setting up my device to get the most out of Windows"

Then go kick the shit out of Satya Nadella 

"stump hodgepodge" is one of the funniest taz balance segments. "What's the biggest prime number?" "It's up there" invented comedy

"the late merle highchurch rolled a five" iconic "how many fingers do i have behind my back?" "i'm going to say four" iconic "merle hightower highchurch" iconic "he's got it on speakerphone" iconic "who do we work for?" iconic

ordered pizza from a small local place and they didnt actually cut it so i've chosen to revert to a wild animal and begin ripping it apart instead of just using a knife to portion slices

absolutely visceral experience. food is so much more satisfying when you have to fight it. i may be feral

i am not proud to say this but that pizza lasted fifteen minutes. i normally am not that gluttonous, but this goes beyond glutton. there was gluttony and wrath. a whirlwind of sauce, cheese, and pepperoni, all atop a flatbread that was shred apart by my own hands due to the neglect of another

in that moment i was wild. i was free. i understood the simplest joys in life. the joy of eating and manifesting my own destiny

been reflecting on this all day and the unsliced pizza experience honestly ruled. i think everyone should try it sometime or another. you have not truly lived until you just absolutely obliterated a pizza in such a feral manner

is this you

yes

run

My best friend and I have this tradition we call “chicken dinner” where we get a rotisserie chicken, lay it on a tarp, start on opposite ends of the tarp, and on the count of three we both run at the chicken and start ripping into it with our bear hands. We will be on our knees fighting for the best pieces of meat, ripping into the chicken with our faces, and it is the most viscerally delicious chicken I have ever had in my life. Grease gets everywhere. We have to do this outside. We have to tie our hair in buns beforehand.

You have never known the joy of food until you are lunging at your friend to rip the best part of the chicken out of their hand, rolling around on the tarp, stuffing it in your face before they can retaliate, and you realize “holy shit did I just growl?” And then you realize they are doing it too.

The chicken gets decimated. It’s absolutely destroyed. We aren’t allowed back inside until we have been hosed down. It’s the best.

Oh ye of little faith.

People across the street looking through the blinds, "Harold! Harold come quick, they're doing the chicken thing again!"

Always need to reblog the Post when I come across it

THE CHICKEN DINNER LADY WAS AT MY WEDDING ✨🎉

If you're having a bad day, just remember that it's going to be winter soon and imagine what will happen to all the Cybertrucks ❤️

Salt-rusted unprotected steel panels... Meltwater getting into poorly constructed and poorly isolated electronics... Stuck in snowdrifts that a real truck would have been able to deal with... Oh, those are indeed happy images. Yes indeed...

It's winter in the US is anything happening to all the cybertrucks

No snow here yet. Lots of Cybertrucks in my area, so I’ll keep an eye out.

Keep us updated I am so curious to see how they handle Normal Weather

There should be Cybertruck Winter, like Fat Bear Week. Where we see which cybertrucks fall first and which ones make it to the end in usable condition.

Dispatch from the far northern hemisphere and have witnessed a Cybertruck in the winter wilds.

We're early enough into the snow season in that the damage isn't obvious. My guess is that exposure to road salts are really going to destroy these ambulatory dumpsters, but we won't start to see that until spring. Road salt is difficult to impossible to get off in a regular car wash, and we know that Cybertruck can't handle even that.

On the one I saw, any metallic shine that the Cybertruck had was completely lost in a combination of cold winter temps, light street grunge, and lower ambient sunlight. It was the same color as my friend's early 2000s silver pickup truck. One of the big draws, imo, is that stainless steel panelling and to see it turn into the same shade of grey as one of the most popular truck colors twenty years ago would be disappointing to me. It's not special anymore.

Local Cybertruck enthusiasts who are salty dogs at winter driving have started vinyl wrapping their automotive basket cases. The trend seems to be to go from the door windows down, which gives them a beach cooler vibe that is similarly underwhelming.

They’re already having issues! The head lights are sunken in for some reason. This means there is a shelf to hold snow in front of the lights and block them.

Now, every car has to have the snow cleared off the headlights before you drive, but this is way worse. That shelf collects snow as you drive. People have to pull over and clear the snow off mid-drive because they lose their headlights.

WHY ARE THEY BUILT THAT WAY

(through gritted teeth) sometimes what's good for your mental health isn't another do nothing day or a little treat sometimes what's good for you is putting in some of the work. Not all of it at once but sometimes you have to finish that essay or at least take the next step or you have to clean your room or at least dust the shelves or you gotta do the laundry or at least put it all in the hamper and it's not fun and it sucks and it sucks and it sucks and it sucks and it sucks and it sucks and it sucks and it sucks and it sucks and it sucks and it sucks and it sucks and it sucks and it sucks and it sucks and it sucks and it sucks and it sucks and it sucks and it sucks and it sucks and it sucks and it sucks and it sucks but you have to because i read a post on the internet that told me that's what being nice to yourself is sometimes

Having your main anxiety response be Avoidance is crazy cause you'll think you're chillin and then one day you're like waitttt I've been paralyzed with fear this whole time. Damn

Was anybody else playing dead the whole time they were teenagers or is that just a me problem. Like I'm 20 now and I'm like Oh shit I didn't do anything. Because I'm scared

outdoor cat defenders really are simply some of the most Delusional people on the planet, like you can list fact after fact all with verified sources about how bad it is to let cats outside for both them & the environment around them and people will cover their ears and be like "umm not my frumpkins he knows not to play in traffic & he has magical resistance to coyotes and disease"

thinking back to the time that a random girl told me how her cat would always find injured wildlife and bring them to her to try and heal them.

the mental gymnastics genuinely had me speechless

gaslighting germans it’s always morally correct

Loved the follow up to this where the neighbor was confronting her about this video and she was gaslighting her neighbor again by askin if all viatnamese people look the same to them

WHAT A WONDERFUL WORLD

It always makes me wonder when I bump into a really serious Homestuck fan who's under the age of 25, because that means either you were reading it when you were eight years old, or you got into it when it was well past its peak and you're still Like This, and both options raise fascinating questions.

I just got described as an "ad hating commie" by someone because I said a minute of youtube ads is unpleasant. fully spent 5 minutes arguing and defending youtube ads. insane stuff

reblog if you are an ad hating commie

the epidemic of grown adults playing tiktoks at full volume in public is rampant why are you acting like a 7 year old with their first ipad you have a mortgage

one guy was facetiming his sister, she was in Texas for work and I know this because they were yell-talking at each other. This went on for a few minutes so I got up, walked over and sat down in the chair next to him an asked if she was staying hygrated as I heard Texas can get really hot in the summer and that it looked like she has a bit of a sun burn.

The two of them were flabergasted. And the guy said "what are you doing???"

So I was like. "....well you included me in this call and I'm just worried about your sister."

He goes "Im having a PRIVATE conversation!"

So I goes "If it was private then how the hell do i know youre talking to your sister who is in texas on a business trip?"

Ultimately im not sure he really got the point but he lowered the volume because now he's worried about creeps like me listening to his conversations but at least he's behaving now even if he doesnt understand why

You're a hero, I hope you know that.

I literally did this to someone. She was listening to very very descriptive erotica on the beach at max volume. So I walked over, sat down next to her, and asked her to catch me up on the plot I'd missed. When she asked what the hell I was doing I said "oh I thought this was like a book club thing? Since you're playing it at full volume on a crowded beach?" She suddenly remembered she did in fact bring headphones and was willing to use them. She kept looking at me like I was a lunatic for the rest of the time she was there but it was probably the funniest thing I'd ever done

we live in hell. what do you mean elon musk is going to lead a new department of our government called "doge"

im sorry if this is how you found out. yes its real

This is a defiling of Kabosu's memory