i'm still here?

Estuve pensando que nadie me piensa. Que estoy absolutamente sola. Que nadie, nadie siente mi rostro dentro de sí ni mi nombre correr por su sangre. Nadie actúa invocándome, nadie construye su vida incluyéndome. He pensado tanto en estas cosas. He pensado que puedo morir en cualquier instante y nadie amenazará a la muerte, nadie la injuriará por haberme arrastrado, nadie velará por mi nombre. He pensado en mi soledad absoluta, en mí destierro de toda conciencia que no sea la mía. He pensado que estoy sola y que me sustento sólo en mí para sobrellevar mi vida y mi muerte. Pensar que ningún ser me necesita, que ninguno me requiere para completar su vida.

— Alejandra Pizarnik

can someone recommend some beginner normal behaviors for someone looking to become normal

Call now to recieve help with the inability to make phone calls!

Fill out this forum to receive assistance with your difficulty filling out forms

Come on down to our center thats two hours away so we can give assistance with your inability to walk or drive

There's help out there! You're just not trying hard enough!

biggest mindfuck is the fact that it can be so so difficult to tell the difference between when it's time for "do it bored/scared/stupid but by jove just do it" and when it's time for "if it sucks hit the bricks"

— Rachel Cusk, Second Place

—Leslie Feinberg, Stone Butch Blues

"do it scared" ok but I would like to do something some other way occasionally. Like at least once. For a change.

— Ottessa Moshfegh, Death in Her Hands

The thing about becoming disabled is that it touches every part of your life—which means it changes every part of your life.

Your own self image will likely be completely broken down. You are not who you thought you were, and your life will not be what you thought it would be. It’s up to you to decide how you want to rebuild yourself. It’s up to you to figure out how to even begin to do that.

Likewise, the way you see the world around you will change. You start viewing everything through a different lens. You have to decide how to interpret what you see, and what you do about it.

You learn which parts of you are intrinsic, unchangeable. In some ways, you become a new person. You learn things about yourself and about the world around you that other people might never have to learn.

@ fic authors what do you personally consider a successful fic? What’s the bar?

actually writing the fic down

“do it scared” im literally always scared i dont have another setting.

[/ID: we consume so much, now, that perhaps we don’t know what it means to exist as something unsellable. i had to give up journalling because i couldn’t stop writing for the people who would read it after i was dead. /end ID]

feeling like you're 'too much' and 'not enough' at the same time is so confusing and heartbreaking

— Agnes Callard, from “The Problem with Marital Loneliness,” The New Yorker (25 September 2021)

born to infodump forced to constantly worry if the other person actually cares or if im making sense or if i said something wrong or if im embarrassing myself or if they want me to stop talking or

abandonment issues are sooooo funny. "i'm scared people will leave me so i push them away and leave them first to avoid being hurt" girl the prophecy is self fulfilling!!! the sabotage is coming from within!!! you forgot about the cycle!!!!!!!!!

https://twitter.com/isabelunraveled

"You can't make them - whoever your particular them is - do anything, really," said Ekaterin slowly. "Adulthood isn't an award they'll give you for being a good child. ... You have to just...take it. Give it to yourself, I suppose. Say, I'm sorry you feel like that, and walk away. But that's hard."

- Lois McMaster Bujold, A Civil Campaign

Every time you're given a choice between disappointing someone else and disappointing yourself, your duty is to disappoint that someone else. Your job throughout your entire life, is to disappoint as many people as it takes to avoid disappointing yourself.

- glennon doyle, untamed

[Text ID: One of the biggest markers for maturity is when you become willing to disappoint the people you love in favour of what feels right to you, when you start to unravel the stories you've told yourself (or been told) about who you are and what you should be. These stories are the pillars that hold up to the jenga-tower that is our ego. As we start to remove them one by one, the whole thing begins to tumble down. This is the process of individuation: becoming who you truly are instead of who you want to be for others. Disappointing people is practically a rite of passage in creating a life that is yours, rather than one your parents, family, friends or even a younger, more conditioned version of yourself might have imagined for you. /end ID]