How to Bring up your own Mental Health Issues with a Friend
- Be prepared: Think about the different reactions, positive and negative, that the person might have so you’re prepared. The person will be thinking about their perception of mental illness, you as a person and how the two fit together.
- Choose a good time: Choose a time and place when you feel comfortable and ready to talk.
- Be ready for lots of questions…or none: The person you are talking to might have lots of questions or need further formation to help them understand. Or they might feel uncomfortable and try to move the conversation on – if this happens it’s still helpful that the first step has been taken.
- An initial reaction might not last: The person might initially react in a way that’s not helpful – maybe changing the subject, using clichés rather than listening. But give them time.
- Have some information ready: Sometimes people find it easier to find out more in their own time – why not hand them a leaflet or a printout of some information on what you’re dealing with?
- Keep it light: We know that sometimes people are afraid to talk about mental health because they feel they don’t know what to say or how to help. So keeping the conversation light will help make you both feel relaxed.
- Take up opportunities to talk: If someone asks you about your mental health, don’t shy away, be yourself and answer honestly if you feel safe doing so.
- Courage is contagious: Often once mental health is out in the open, people want to talk. Don’t be surprised if your honesty encourages other people to talk about their own experiences.
- Give them time: Some people need to take a little to think about things like this, maybe do their own research before they want to go deeper into the topic. This is not necessarily a bad sign!
- Their reaction is not your fault: Unfortunately, there will always be people that do not react well. While that is disappointing, keep in mind that this is not your fault. You can’t be blamed for what you’re dealing with and did nothing wrong - the problem is their attitude, not you.
- Let them know what you need: Be open about how you would like them to support you - it can be much easier for people to not feel overwhelmed when they know what is expected of them.
- Remember this is about you: Make sure you are comfortable with everything that happens and is discussed. Don’t let them ask questions that make you uncomfortable and don’t just accommodate them.
Let me know if anything should be added/changed!