diamondtveit

every successive line in this scene knocks the wind out of you anew

#that’s my glasses kink your honor

i love santa clarita diet

literally same

santa clarita diet in a nutshell

santa clarita diet in a nutshell

One day I hope to meet someone like Joel from Santa Clarita Diet. Someone who’s so in love with me that even after I turn into a man eating zombie he’ll help cover up a murder for me, drive through the desert to help me bury the dude I just disemboweled and then help me kill more people to keep my deteriorating cannibal ass full because that’s how much he adores me.

My dream right now is to keep my family together and my wife out of jail. And take apart this hammer-knife I made to kill the undead, and use the hammer portion to build bookshelves. Then, when my workday is done, the knife to cut brie and, perhaps, an apple.

I feel like Joel Hammond is the best representation of myself dealing with life right now…