On HP being unkind. On the one hand it is a children’s book and deals with things from a child’s POV. Life is unfair and children hate this. As a child reading HP I got super hung up on the bullying for example, especially by Snape and Draco. I hate how it is never addressed and wonder- is it unkindness? Is it meant to be reflective of reality? Of British boarding schools (with classism and racism and hazing)?
I'm a little unsure of what you mean by "never addressed." Snape and Draco are meant to be awful characters. I disagree with the reading of Snape in some circles, which seems to interpret the book as completely exonerating Snape, because he helps Harry in the end and Harry names a kid after him. I don't think the text exonerates Snape. I think Snape was meant to be complex, and the text succeeds in its intent. He is terrible to children, and bears a grudge against Harry, while at the same time continually protecting Harry, and helping to defend the world against Voldemort, and having a tragic love story. I do agree that Snape's death vastly simplifies his issues, as we don't have to reconcile, at any point, his cruelty with his goodness. We don't have to consider how to deal with someone who treats people terrible and is petty and hateful toward children, but is still helping protect them and others.
Perhaps you mean he doesn't "suffer enough" as a consequence to his bullying, but I actually read his death as a kind of punishment--he actually can't exist after his "good side" is revealed, because it's too complex for the world of HP. What do you do with him if he lives--you can't honor him, because he's terrible, but you can't punish him, because he helped. If he's dead you can honor him because you don't actually have to deal with him, which is a complete cop-out.
Meanwhile, Draco is consistently awful, and never gets a redemption arc, and is never meant to be anything but a childhood bully, with some insights about why children are bullies packed in. You see in the later books that he relies on his family; you see that his arrogance and cruelty really comes from constantly being in a position of power. You see that he is young and scared, which I think makes a point about plenty of bullies not being born cruel, but merely using tools they have at their disposal to make themselves feel good.
Do you mean that Draco's and Snape's bullying is never commented upon or condemned by the other authority figures within Hogwarts, such as McGonagall and Dumbledore, or outside of it, such as Tonks or Sirius or the Weasleys? If so, I don't really see how unkindness figures into that. I definitely do think it is a case of JKR wanting to depict reality, not just of British boarding schools, but the reality of children in general.
As you say, life is unfair, but the reason "children hate this" is that life is particularly unfair for children. Children lack the knowledge, resources, experience, and power to identify and call out bullying (as well as plenty of other kinds of abuse). While adults are often bullied and often feel powerless, they're still not as helpless as children. Even privileged children are under someone's control, always, and no matter how good the school, no matter how well-meaning and attentive the adults, it is usually far easier to prey upon children than adults.
