QUAM SERENA, QUAM BENIGMA

O CASTITATIS LILIUM

☾༺ Blog will contain yandere / jirai themes. Block don't report. ༻☽

MEET YOUR NEW AND IMPROVED ANGEL

☾༺ Hi! I'm Angel and I'm a lifestyle jirai! I love rotting away in my room almost as much as I love my girlfriend/boyfriend!! They mean more to me than life itself~

☾༺ I am 21 and I use She/Her pronouns and I identify as cupioromantic + Nicosexual! I love my partner that I made up a sexuality just for me so that I can only love them lol

☾༺ I struggle a lot mentally which I am very open about! My main struggles are with my BPD, AuDHD, and anxiety!

☾༺ DNI: Bigots, Racists, MAPs, Pro-Shippers, Necrophiles, Zoophiles, Loli/Shota-cons, DDLG blogs or variants, etc. Flirting with me or my partner is off limits! I will block freely.

☾༺ This is my blog where I share my inner thoughts and pieces of myself to the internet. I simply ask that if you take issue with it to just be respectful and block me if needed ♡ ～('▽^人)

i love you nata de coco gotta be one of my favorite textures

my managers really had me fucked up today i don't wanna show up tomorrow (technically today tehe)

like you are not gonna come up to me and tell me i literally am not allowed to leave until i sell a bag.

when it wasn't a requirement on the overview of the goals for today nor do i earn anything from it, get off my fucking ass i am going to clock out when my shift ends period point blank

i feel like i'm at a weird place where i don't want to get better but i feel like i don't have a choice

my self destructive actions hurt others and i have to think of people outside of myself but at the same time god do i NOT want to do therapy and shit

do i need it? yes absolutely, but i really don't want it

i wish i could want to get better on my own but i don't, i don't want to do any of this

but i have to, i don't have much choice unless i want to damage my relationships with people

one of my friends just removed me as a follower and unfollowed me what the fuck ????

we didn't have any fight or anything she literally hasn't spoken to me in months ?????

someone who had literal emojis as pronouns and shedblr in their dni followed me

"let me follow someone who talks about sh when i don't want sh blogs to interact" the fuck?

my friend trying to explain to me how her way of dealing with intrusive thoughts is 100% successful and has helped with them incredibly but refuses to listen to me when i say that i spiral so bad i cannot get even a shred of reality in

i don't get a small break where i become self aware until i've been starting into space for five minutes and am on the brink of a panic attack

but she just keeps on going about how i can just gaslight myself into not giving power to those thoughts when a lot of the time it's real things that have happened or things that could be realistic

i wish she would just listen but she only ever really cares about talking about herself and her life

i wanna fucking puke

i passed the fuck out but i am awake now ‼️

i miss my boyfriend so so so so so so so bad very sad very lonely very pet left at home when you go on vacation

me, sad: b

boyfriend: i'm so sorry puppy

me: :>

oh this is my thirteenth reason oh my fucking god i left my water bottle in front of the vending machine that ATE MY DOLLAR

it's not gonna be there if i go back for it because it's not like i left it at my store

oh my god

oh my god.

i'm going to go batshit insane one more bad thing and i am going to throw a bitch fit

ohhhh i'm gonna quit

oh i'm gonna QUIT

my manager told me halfway through my shift that i have to sell at least one of the gift bags we were pushing today and i thought she was joking eva she she said it with a smile

she wasn't. she made another manager follow me around while i had to ask every single customer if they wanted to buy this fucking bag.

i literally wasn't allowed to leave until i sell one. i don't earn ANY commission from selling things to people! i get hourly wage! why the FUCK am i responsible to force people to spend $40 more when most aren't even there for that shit RAH

hate work but sweet little treat after so i gotta keep my eyes on the prize

Song of the Day #45

"Maneater" by Nelly Furtado

You wish you never ever met her at all