A Revision of the Layered attraction model for All
I typed this out in the closing thoughts question for a survey for visibility, and that evolved into making this post, which became a complete re-design of the layered attraction model to include the full spectrum of romantic and sexual orientations.
Origin of this project:
The presence of romantic attraction without sexual attraction doesn’t invalidate or erase the romantic attraction.
Ace people, for example, whether heteroromantic, homoromatic, Biromantic, etc, have romantic attraction without sexual attraction. It is not unusual for Bi or Pan Demisexual or Graysexual people to experience romantic attraction to more than one gender but only experience sexual attraction towards one gender.
I’ve found out by interacting with people online that even outside of the Ace spectrum, there are also Biromantic Heterosexual (or Homosexual) people who are Allo. You don’t even have to be on the Ace or Aro spectrum to experience romantic and sexual attraction separately. Such people tend to, in public settings, just say they are straight (or gay, as applicable) or Graysexual, to avoid having to justify their romantic attraction to additional genders not being coupled with sexual attraction despite not being Asexual.
To add to that, there’s also the idea that potential partners of the gender for which they only experience romantic attraction would not be happy in a non-sexual relationship unless that person is Ace, or perhaps that they themselves wouldn’t, since they do experience sexual attraction to other genders. But that is broad brushing, and given that Ace people can be in happy, fulfilling relationships with Allo people, then it is possible. It’s just a matter of whether they’d want to pursue that or not. That’s just another reason why Biromantic Heterosexual and Biromantic Homosexual people tend not to be out or only be out online.
The Layered Attraction Model (est 2017 as far as I can tell):
Here’s the Layered attraction model for those who haven’t seen it. It combines the Ace Spectrum (with some Arospec poorly thrown in), the Kinsey Scale, and a scale of polyamory (idk if that scale has its own name). It has served as a starting point for educating people and helping people find their labels. I definitely think we need additional dimensions. It wouldn’t make for as nice a graphic, but just the list part is fine with me.
Kinsey scale deals with frequency/proportion of attraction, but the original layered model does not account for different types of attraction to different genders. The wording in the original focuses on action rather than attraction. One’s orientation is defined by attraction, not by what you choose to act on or have had opportunity to act on. Instead of “prefers,” it should say “experiences attraction to”.
Demisexuality corresponds to Pink in the layered attraction model, but the description of Pink as written assumes alloromanticism. It doesn’t really include those who are also Demiromantic (double Demis), or other aro-spec identities. The wording of what appears to be aro-ace is also problematic.
A potential solution is to duplicate the layered attraction cake for the Aro spectrum, allowing you to choose a Kinsey Scale number for your romantic attraction separate from the number for your sexual attraction. Instead of reds and pinks, it’d use greens & grays for the Arospec colors. Adding a column for one’s gender identity would make this model a full label. Acespec, Arospec, Romantic orientation, Sexual orientation, and gender identity.
This should cover everyone. Oriented aroace demiboys, Double demi panromantic homosexual girls, Allo Biromantic Heterosexual guys, Asexual Polyamorus Alloromantic Heteroromantic trans women, etc, etc.
We are a diverse community, and the world is more diverse than we tend to recognize.
The Full Spectrum Layered Attraction and Identity Model:
It took a couple of weeks before I finished the project and came back to this draft post. Behold the revamped layered attraction model:
(It’s 34″ squared, so please zoom in to full read your parts.)
It includes:
- Romantic orientation
Aromantic Spectrum Kinsey Scale Polyamory scale
- Sexual orientation
Asexual Spectrum Kinsey Scale Sex Favorability
- Gender Identity
Gender Identity Cis-Trans-Intersex (not mutually exclusive) Gender Fluidity
I did my best to make this inclusive to everyone, but if I missed anything or worded anything poorly, please let me know and I will make a revised version. (Especially with the gender part, seeing as I am cis.)
Also, thank you to my fellow mods of @demisexual-kingdom for giving the finished product a look over before posting.
This was a big undertaking, but I think it turned out well. If I missed anything or worded anything wrong, especially with gender, please feel free to send an ask my way directly or to the full mod team here at demisexual-kingdom , and I will gladly make revisions (in bulk if there are multiple).
With love,
Mod K-P
