There is a certain point where it becomes “I turn right at the place where I turn right, then take the shortcut which I know about, then left where I turn left. Yes, I’m sure all of these things have proper names but I don’t recall what they are. The only landmarks I remember are places which were torn down decades ago.”
Well, who knew. 😏
this image? we have every reason to think it is a cucumber, like it was made in clay models in burials period, it's painted green, it's on the small side of things (9.6 cm or 3 3/4 inch)
oh right and it was placed on a model offering table with small model bread and drinking cup
sometimes a cucumber really is a cucumber.
Some poor sculptor went through the effort to make this shape look as much as possible like a cucumber and avoid the incredibly slippery slope to dick, and this is how people treat their efforts.
I know it's unfair vilification and stuff but it's also a lot of fun to see old media and stuff where people were SO scared of big animals like lions, sharks, crocodiles and wolves were fully expected to just come and eat you the moment you stepped into their territory. In older media we also made that assumption about gorillas and in still older we thought it'd be whales. But some animals that will actually fuck you up got left behind. Boars will kill you and eat you. They're way more likely to do so than any of those other things actually. Hippos, obviously, got off like bandits always being depicted as cute and dopey. And then there's the squids. Not giant kraken size squids. The eight foot squids that hunt in packs and will fuck you up if you fall in the water at night. I can't BELIEVE people slept on that. It's like all they cared about were the huge deep sea ones we never see. The medium size wolf pack squids were right there.
Oh some of you don't know about the squids. I talked about them in another thread that went kinda viral somewhere or other but one of the reasons you should not swim in the open ocean at night in many parts of the world is that the water starts teeming with these:
And as you can see it is not like instant death, they too are just animals and they are often just gently curious about the presence of humans! But people who study and dive with sharks will tell you you're safe as long as you stay calm and know what you're doing. The world's leading professional night divers and experts on these squids, specifically??? Stress in every interview and article and paper they write in that you simply do not fuck around with these squids. They know what they're doing and they still all have at least one story of being attacked, in some cases having to be hospitalized. Considering just how rarely anybody puts themselves in the pitch dark nighttime ocean on purpose, let alone during a squid feeding frenzy, it sounds like they're quite a bit more likely to consider you potential food than other marine predators. We also don't know how many fatal attacks might have ever happened, because what humboldt squid like to do with large prey is just drag it away into the darkness forever. The two worst attacks ever proven involved two or three squid at a time latching on to a diver (in BOTH cases they were professionals and knew the risk!) and jetting straight downward with enough force that both divers suffered injury from the sudden pressure change alone, including burst eardrums, nearly passed out and they probably would have died if they hadn't broken free. In general, people who die drowning in the dark open ocean are either never found, or they're found in pieces picked over by enough scavengers that the precise cause of death can only be narrowed down to "the sea." But now you know ONE of "the sea's" possible murder weapons :)
There's a short section on Humboldt squid in Wikipedia's entry for Cephalopod attacks on humans:
And if you can get past some of Animal Planet's hokey presentation style, this video includes a bit of interview with one of those professional experts who still got nearly squidded from existence:
There is of course some debate about all this, with some arguing that all proven documented attacks occurred on people with reflective diving equipment, which they say the squid must have mistaken for the shine of fish. However, there are lots and lots of people who have to fish around these squids to survive, who do not have access to that kind of equipment, and also have a consensus that if you fall in the water when big squids are out hunting you might disappear without a trace or perhaps just get your head bitten open. With many modern science guys agreeing with this sentiment, this is one case where the "they're just misunderstood sea friends" crowd is kind of outnumbered. The sea at night is theirs and not ours is all. It's not ours during the day either but since we are neither marine nor nocturnal animals we are double fools in the eyes of the squids, which by the way are these eyes:
No for real:
Absolutely! Also, the Humboldt squid will hunt in packs, sometimes with one flashing brightly to draw attention while the others approach in near unseeable camoflage!
Beautiful footage of the nefarious sea demons also :)
Also because I can't reblog every addition together:
Okay where's the other 1199
I absolutely adore Humboldt squid. I saw a doc once where a scientist was cage diving to study them, and one of the squid squeezed it's entire massive body through the cage bars, bit the guy and squeezed right back out.
Why isnt this an animal that's already long gone viral like honey badgers once did. This is the animal that actually gives no fucks. People really are just that obsessed with bigger squids I guess? But the bigger ones frankly come across as big softies in comparison. One big sea monster can never be as intimidating as a thousand coordinated man sized sea monsters.
This is why I thought that if mermaids had a cultural equivalent to lycanthropy it'd be weresquids. Fun fact nocturnal marine life increases activity on the brightest nights ie the full moon.
coworker asks if i like harry potter and i have to make a disco elysium skill check to come up with a response
CIS COWORKER — Hey you seem really into wizards and stuff, I bet you love Harry Potter :)
EMPATHY — He’s just trying to be polite and make conversation. He doesn’t know about JK Rowling’s opinions on trans people. Let’s politely change the subject.
COMPOSURE [Trivial: Failure] — “Kill yourself.”
One of my favorites.
No matter how you personally feel about AI, it's extremely important to understand that AI checkers are pure bullshit. Too many people cling to them as "proof" that "you can easily tell" and it's gonna do so much damage. Better to sit with the potential discomfort of accepting in plenty of cases it's impossible to tell if something is AI or not (specially in the case of text) than to feed a mindset that will get people punished for "cheating" that they literally didn't do.
I follow this lady on instagram who rescues cats, and i have been thinking about this video for literal months. behold the transformation of this wretched little beast
(x)
I could not have anticipated that transformation if you had told me ahead of time
tom animal crossing nook made you work for like 3 minutes and you spit on him like this god damn
he forces you into debt
that you literally never ever have to pay off unless you want him to build you a bigger house you floppy shoes rainbow wig ringling brothers ass bitch
Defending Tom Nook’s debt-based economy is going too far
you pay it off by selling him fucking bugs and rocks go make me a balloon animal bozo
The best possible landlord is still a landlord, and stands at the top of a steep incline
He gives you a house for free that you never have to pay back for. He’s not a fucking landlord he’s a real estate agent you dimwitted radioactive mushroom. You’re never gonna get “evicted” you have complete sovereignty over your land, can place anything and everything you can fit in the space, put up whatever decorations paint jobs and wallpapers you want. The only downside is if you want to make a large purchase from HIS STORE you gotta pay off the last large purchase (you can still buy mailboxes and fences and nice cobblestone paths)His entire backstory is that he got his heart broken by capitalism and decided to move to a small town and give people affordable housing and affordable upgrades to said housing.
And the house? The money you don’t even have to pay unless you want HIM to expand your house for you?
18,400 bells
For reference a single apple sells for 100 bells
Which means you pay for a house (really you are paying for the upgrade) for the same price as 15 dozen apples.
You are literally buying a house for the same price as 15. Dozen. Apples
Let’s put that in perspective to say. America. A honeycrisp apple at Kroger costs 1.70 each on average meaning a dozen costs around 20 dollars. Meaning the price of a house in Tom Nooks store (that once again you never even have to pay back) is equivalent to a whopping 306 dollars.
That’s it. To pay off a house and let you get renovations you have to pay less than a single months rent at any apartment.
Go throw a pie in someone’s face since you want to be a clown.
That last line goes so hard.
I immediately had to go put it in Objection Maker.
Lego Swimming Pool Layout
Me watching: okay I kind of get it now
Since klingon sex is basically violent wrestling, I wonder if the klingons don’t have BDSM but like the opposite. Klingons gathering in secrecy in dark cellars to engage in sweet, gentle loving, to the scorn of fellow klingons.
“How can you do that?” the other klingons ask. “You don’t even draw blood? Not a single furniture breaking? It doesn’t seem… natural”.
“What is this… cuddle, you speak of?”
im into klingon hug dungeons
star trek heritage post (July 30th, 2014)
I didn’t realize this post turned 10 years earlier this year!
And I still get reblogs.
Cheers to weird shit you say on the internet never going away.
I call this one "what if salmon just kept getting worse"
