they should invent a baking that doesn't come with dishes to wash

How does superglue REFUSE to come out of the tube when you're actively trying to get some out, but as soon as you give up and put it down, the damn thing decides it's time to do world's best pineapple-with-a-werewolf-boyfriend -impression?

This website makes it impossible to communicate with normal people.

Diagram of my kitten who fell asleep on my lap that i drew through tears. Pleawse. I cant get up

im aware this is an insane thing to say but i fucking. love characters that are just cockroaches. and i dont mean like. gross i mean they just do not fucking die. they can survive anything. they will outlive EVERYONE because they just will not die no matter what be it because they have a reason or because they literally cannot stop surviving the odds i love it i love it

thinking two characters have had sex does not equal shipping at all… i dont have to like it i just know it happened

im sorry but this is the funniest fucking tag i could have seen

One of my favorite genres of post

I have these saved in a folder called "wrong picture, Kronk"

we slidin

At that point he’s a passenger too

Happy we slidin season to all who observe

Happy Anniversary to “we slidin”

he's reeeally pushing his luck

Mx why are they so shaped.

asking questions so stupid not even google's broken AI has anything to say about it

woke up this morning, rolled over, and very confidently tried to blow out my alarm clock like a candle. absolutely no precedent for that.

Ebeneezer in 1742 wakes with a start as for some reason he has put out his guttering candle by slapping atop it ith the palm of his hand. His hand is burned and his nightgown and cap are spattered with hot wax.

i meant to empty my contact lens case of cleaner and instead launched my allergy pills down the drain. wasn't even holding the lens case

once confidently pointed my car keys at the door out of my house and pressed the unlock button

when I used to drive I once walked to the front and bend down as if to start the crank. like. an a fuckin olde timey car. I never did it before or again but I will never forget how second nature it felt nor the cold breeze of 'what the fuck' that instantly followed

i once got home and tried to eat my dog's squeaky ball like an orange. thank god i didn't try to eat it like an apple, because after trying and failing to peel a small tennis ball for a couple seconds to get at the fruit, the rest of my brain kicked in.

So there is this thing that the two Villeneuve Dune movies do together that I cannot stop thinking about, where they will present something (often, a weapon) in a context the first time around where it looks a certain way (often, very sexy and cool). And then they will present it again in a way that doesn't exactly negate your reading of the original context but makes you recoil in horror from the new context.

Explain yourself.

some people might not have seen all of them yet

none of these edits are as good as the original. we are losing our culture

No, I don't think I will