⚜On the wings of the night amidst the stars ⚜

Just a question for the Christians out there (and possibly any other religious folk), who are familiar with mental health problems.

I know others experience that too and so I wanted to ask if you have any advice on how to pray or have any kind of relationship with God when you're really in the trenches. By that I mean when you're really depressed, sad and lonely. When you feel so desperate but got beyond that point and just feel deserted and completely disappointed with God. I am aware that this is the moment we need God the most but in my experience there is nothing to hope for even if you pray or scream for God's help there. So I was just wondering if anybody could relate or if you have any insight about what we could do then?

I know you can force yourself to pray but that never helped me and it's not quite self-loving. It's easy to pray and be in relationship with God when things go as usual or just mildly challenging. But there are times when you can't physically get yourself to talk even.

Does anybody have an idea or maybe a perspective on that, which might give an impulse for new thoughts? Thank you in advance, I appreciate any ideas! :)

I have found that some trad women actually go so far to one end that they eventually become very abrasive and rigid and gruff in their own behaviour and world view.

I also feel my grandpa coming through at some times and I'm really proud of that! 😄 But I was at that place of rigidity and thinking Trump rules and pull yourself together, you know what I mean. And sometimes that is still fitting, especially in those times where we all seem to harden to survive. But I was "lucky" that my trauma at some point really required softening and just cracked up this stoney shell that I had built myself in and I'm pretty thankful for that.

You can really come out as the very thing you hate if you stretch out your coping mechanisms too far. I find femininity and flexibility to be very hard work actually because the world (as in humankind) is not very conducive to softening and gentleness at this point. But being a traditional woman to me also entails the effort of being a bit like water and maybe like the sweet flowers swimming on top of it. ☺️🌸 It is hard work to become more compassionate and gentle and warm when all you want to do is close up and be cold to the world. But we're here to be women. 💗🧚🏼‍♀️🌱