I hope it's okay that I I reblog, if that doesn't feel comfortable to you, just say and I'll delete that and answer you privately.
I just wanted to say that I feel you, very much. I've read "Harry Potter" for the first time in 2002 and I've always been a fan of Snape with varying intensity. But for the most part I've been actively in the fandom from 2002 until 2011 at least. It was okay to be a Snape fan, you just swam along with the others and there was always respect between people who liked their personal characters. To my recollection, people didn't even attack each other for their favourite characters, they just had them.
I came back to the fandom in 2022 more actively and with more interest and I'd say 3/4 have been a nightmare ever since. I wasn't prepared for what is going on now. My 12-year-old self grew up with this and I basically kept that in my heart and I'm trying very hard to keep it by staying out of many discussions and by keeping much in private.
I still can't process the way people treat J.K. Rowling and it hurts me to see that, no one deserves that. Plus it makes me sad for the fandom as well. And having Snape as your favourite character is, as you said a terrible experience online 4/5 of the time. I was not prepared for this horror. I'm 33 years old now, so luckily I have some better strategies for staying out of useless discussions or facing them with clarity but even on Pinterest, you read the same idiotic takes over and over and over again, sometimes it really is too much for me. In my opinion, this development is directly linked to the rapidly shifting moral framework that has happened in (Western) society. To be considered a "good person" you have to fulfill so much stricter rules and concepts. I have personally decided that I won't do that in many ways but younger folks often feel more pressure to adapt. Theres many 'dark' aspects that we all have, that people get more and more conditioned to shove away and to 'not be'. They don't disappear by that, it just gets blocked away from self-perception. So in order to cope, where might that go? To the fictional spaces oftentimes. Snape embodies this dichotomy of extremely bright and very dark aspects quite well and I assume this is one reason why people hate on him so relentlessly, it's a good figure to let out that hatred/ tension they can't deal with in themselves.
That's just a couple of my thoughts on that. I was actually so glad to read your post, it's good to know others feel it too. What I also find really unpleasant is how Snape is being portrayed in fanart and fanfiction these days most of the time. I guess that is a mirror of society's problems also. You either get the effeminate, girl-like whatever that artists and writers often tend to make him now or the animalistic, sadistic BDSM-fanatic that fanfiction really often writes him as. This is nothing like what I grew up with. And the only good thing is that I remember. There is also really good stuff out there even today, don't get me wrong. Some writers still blew me away with their really, really good stories and character studies. Especially because it's Snape, you see who is an actually good and gifted writer and who can see and feel into the character and even develop something new with more insight. I also really like fanart from artists like KedroBoiz (I hope I wrote that correctly). Sorry for the long rant, that just hit a nerve with me. ;) I just hope that this too shall pass and we might experience better times "Harry Potter"-wise again too. God bless ya and take care. ♡