You can nail me to the cross.
But you cannot force me to hate you.
~ Jesus
@darkness-holds-eternal-light / darkness-holds-eternal-light.tumblr.com
~ Jesus
Joan of Arc
Pray for us.
It really is always the same, I can either appear strange to people or I can appear strange to myself. God loves me either way, even though I cannot feel it mostly. But I can believe it without b.s.ing myself. God loves me just as I am, the one that is content with herself and the one that desperately wishes people would like me and connect with me the way I am. I have to see both and maybe it's important to see the me that is really unhappy with being avoided and shied away from. That is not cool with "just doing my thing whatever". I won't bend myself and I also can't, it's both distasteful and impossible. But I can be more honest and more authentic with myself. And admit that I want to be liked by others, even by the cool kids, which I never really managed. I can really want that and really admit that I also won't be their cup of tea most of the time. Maybe I can develop the courage to stand in front of the people I really wanted to like me and they didn't like me back and say - hey, I really wanted you to like me so much! And the people I have opened my heart to and trusted elatedly and whom I've loved deeply and who didn't love me back. I remember you. And I know you dont like me but I so hoped and longed for you to love me back! I still can't change the fact that I saw something so truly worth loving in you but I trust that God will restore all of the times that I gave and did not receive. I trust that God sees my worth unchangingly and that He knows how I will be okay in the end. Please, oh God, lead me, I need all of your strength and all of your glory right now. Please hold me safe and like the One who knows me and always loves me from the most fervent depth of His heart. Please, heal us all, my God, I know I have friends here who feel this too and who deeply deserve and need your healing. Thank you God, Amen. 💚
get befriended
In celebration of two very nice people, who came to my blog and confirmed that I'm not merely screaming into the void, I'll post something new. ☺️😉😊 May God bless us all, good things are coming. 🧡💖💜💚 All the best to all of you out there! 😊🙏🏼🥰
I'm just putting this out here. Please tell me, is anybody still reading what I post? Thanks.
all cats deserve a self portrait
Source: toffeemuffy
1934-2024
I'm crying so hard, I miss her so much. 😓😢😭😭😭
Rest in peace, dearest Maggie Smith. ❤🙏🏼✝️
I don't know if it's just me but I'm sick and tired of people treating you like shit because they provide something that you happen to need. I'm terminally done with this. Just because I happen to have a need that I don't know how to completely fulfill myself doesn't mean you get to take away my rights or my humanity and treat me like I'm as much as you graciously allow me to be. Go fuck yourself!!!
I have over a 100 followers but rarely any interaction here on my posts at all. I've considered that maybe I was shadow-banned. I wonder if that ever changes back again. 🤔
-Sylvia Plath, The Letters of Sylvia Plath Volume I: 1940–1956
understandable 🐱