GUESS I'LL DIE,¯\_(ツ)_/¯

tfw you essentially raise your brother and have to keep your parents from accidentally killing him all while not letting him know

I don't remember why I wrote this but uhhh here's a short thing

Jazz waited patiently, in the Arkham Asylum staff parking lot. She could hear the sound of gunshots going off behind the thick walls, and some kind of minor explosion rocked the ground.

But still she waited, quietly, leaning against her car with an arm full of reports she was taking home to fill out and file.

She stared at the back door of the facility, it was thick steel, requiring a specific passcode to open. It was updated regularly, which made it hard for the staff to remember and caused many of them to write it down somewhere. Jazz had brought the issue up with her supervisor, he said he would look into it. That had been a month ago.

The steel door swung open, and out stepped the man she had been waiting for.

Halfa jazz design go brrrrr

Because I noticed my top characters are all "Fenton kids" + Vlad

So let's put them all in one big family portrait :p

xxx

Jazz and spike :D

oh noooo but imagine Fentons Prime hanging out with Alternate Danny and actually being thrown off by how normal he is and in having a comparison it finally occurs to them that something about their Danny is way way off

like Alternate Maddie makes a comment on how much her Danny is such a lazy kid and how those dang teenage growth-spurts have him eating her out of house and home

and Maddie Prime is like... oh, our Danny just like, forgets to eat all the time usually we have to remind him, he also doesn't sleep all that much we're pretty sure he has insomnia but he won't talk to us about it

Alternate Maddie: oh weird, our Danny tells us everything, is your Danny okay?

Alternate Jazz is probably way less high strung than Jazz Prime but also still has a lot of that superiority complex/over controlling attitude that Jazz Prime grew out of due to having to deal with more Heavy Shit and being forced to mature far more quickly

Alternate Jazz keeps talking about how great it is to finally talk to someone on her intellectual level but Jazz Prime can't stand her ego ("oh god did I really used to sound like that? how embarrassing")

the Fenton parents are almost identical in every way except Alternate Fentons are far more successful as ghost hunters because they don't have a Phantom sniping their targets out from under them, their equipment and experiments are more advanced because they've had more subjects to experiment on

Fentons Prime are extremely jealous

Danny Prime is horrified when they talk about the brutal dissections of ghosts he personally knows

Mr Lancer: I need your mother or father to sign this.

Danny: You're gonna have to be specific, I have like 8 of each.

Mr Lancer: ...

Danny: Either I'm collecting them or they're collecting me. Either way depending on what you want signed it could be any of them you need.

Mr Lancer: It's ... For an excursion?

Danny: Do you know how little that narrows it down?

Mr Lancer: To the Greek exhibition in the natural history museum.

Danny: Ah, Pandora or Clockwork then, gotchya.

And that day Mr Lancer learnt that several ghosts are legally down as Danny's guardians alongside his parents and Jack and Maddie seem blissfully unaware. Jazz is also listed as a guardian in case of emergency.

Actually Johnny is for skipping because he'll act like he's gonna tell Danny off but then they just go get ice-cream.

Clockwork is for late assignments and missing out on events often rearranging time just for Danny's sake.

Frostbite is the one to contact if Danny needs emotional support because he's the one who is able to handle it without crying or trying to alter a timeline.

Wulf is more like an older brother but he is like a big fuzzy body guard and can be asked to chaperone. No one is ever late when he carpools and no one ends up lost in time like that one time they asked Clockwork... Poor Kevin...

Skulker does get called in for fights about two to three times before teachers realise he isn't the best person to contact. Rather than discouraging violence Skulker just tells Danny how he could have done it better. They call him about camping trips now.

Walker becomes the one they call for fights because Walker discourages violence. But Unbeknownst to teachers he just teaches Danny how to use the law to his advantage and that ... Might not be better?

Boxy just makes sure everything Danny needs is always available. He leaves boxes of supplies with the front office.

Pandora deals in history assignments, emotional support if Danny needs to rampage and generally just Mom stuff like bake sales if the cakes shouldn't come to life.

Kitty and Ember tag team handle anything to do with bullying because those girls can tear down a mean kid to the core in seconds. Ember also is the one to show up for music related events. Kitty just sorta makes sure Danny doesn't make any major fashion blunders like his crocs and socks fiasco that one time none of the ghosts will acknowledge, not even Danny.

Dorathea mostly acts as moral support, a second chaperone and she signs anything to do with balls or parties, making sure Danny is allowed to go. These are the events she likes to chaperone but usually Danny just convinces everyone to just have Dorathea be part of the event. She's won Queen of the Dance at multiple events.

Lunch Lady handles catering and Danny's lunch, though she treats Danny more like a grandchild than a direct child.

Desiree loves getting involved in theatre and often designs the outfits for plays to be historically accurate, with some help from Clockwork. The theatre kids love Danny even though he doesn't often participate, because Desiree always sets them up with awesome clothes and props.

Okay but where's the fic??

oh jeez, oh no, uhhh, I can't possibly take on a second long for wip

.╚(•⌂•)╝

(。﹏。)

┗|｀O′|┛

（*゜ー゜*）

Okay okay CONSIDER: this all occurs like. Immediately post reveal, which is why no one really questions why Danny's entire rouges gallery has adopted him.

there are 3 types of siblings: The Bad, The Sweet, and The Annoying. Take your pick.

i saw this post earlier about therapists and it reminded me of my old therapist paul, who in my opinion is one of the greatest men alive and who did not put up with my bullshit for even one second

anyway i go in to see paul one week in the summer of 2016, and i’m doing my usual bullshit which consists of me talking shit about myself, and paul is staring at me, and then he cuts me off and says that he’s got a new tool for helping people recognize when they’re using negative language, and gets up and goes over to his desk

and i’m like alright hit me with that sweet sweet self-help article my man, because i’m a linguistic learner and whenever paul’s like here i have a tool for you to use it’s pretty much always an article or a book or something

paul opens a drawer, takes something out, and turns back around. i stare.

i say, paul.

is that a nerf gun.

yeah, says paul.

i say, are you gonna shoot me with a nerf gun in this professional setting.

he happily informs me that that’s really up to me, isn’t it. and sits back down. and gestures, like, go ahead, what were you saying?

and i squint suspiciously and start back up about how i’m having too much anxiety to leave the house to run errands, like it was a miracle to even get here, like i’ve forgone getting groceries for the past week and that’s so stupid, what a stupid issue, i’m an idiot, how could i–

a foam dart hits me in the leg.

i go, hey! because my therapist just shot me in the leg. paul blinks at me placidly and raises an eyebrow. i squint again.

i say, slowly, it’s– not a stupid issue, i’m not stupid, but it’s frustrating me and i don’t want it to be a problem i’m having.

no dart this time. okay. sweet.

so the rest of the hour passes with me intermittently getting nailed with tiny foam darts and then swearing and then fixing my language and, wouldn’t you know it, i start liking myself a little more by the end of the session, which is mildly infuriating because paul can tell and he’s very smug about it 

anyway i leave his office and the lady having the next appointment walks in and i hear what’s all over the floor? and paul very seriously says cognitive behavioral therapy tools.

@floralflowerpower Ok but, Jazz using this on Danny in their therapy sessions 🤣

Danny Phantom AU where Vlad went to therapy after his accident and is moderately well adjusted. He still lied, cheated and overshadowed his way into wealth but he’s not super-villain obsessed with the Fentons.

Instead of trying to humiliate and murder Jack at the Class Reunion then steal his Wife (like a crazy person), he planed on tearing into Jack and Maddie for abandoning him after their experiment hospitalized and crippled him and ghosting him for 20 years and making them look (and feel) like horrible people. Preferably in front of a lot of their old classmates.

Then he and Danny have their little hallway confrontation (or smth similar) and he’s torn between:

“Omg this kid is like me, I finally have someone to talk to” and “OMG their son is like me, WTF did they do”.

So he decides to play the long game instead and approaches Danny like a normal person. He (more or less) explains his deal to him and offers to mentor him. Because what would be a sweeter revenge than stealing their son, simply by being a genuinely better parental figure then them, no foul play involved.

And because he didn’t ruin his first impression with Danny by doing or saying something creepy or unhinged, Danny is super exited.

He finally has someone who’s not only just like him and understands what he’s going through, but is experienced enough to teach him about his powers.

I always love this because it could also go super angst-y because Danny is so worn down by his hero status and his parents and like he loves them but also realizes that they are super negligent.

But also I’d love the idea that Vlad explains the Christmas Truce to Danny in advance and Danny stares blankly at Vlad and is like “no… attacks? From Christmas until New Year?”

Vlad nods. “Of course. If anyone causes any trouble, every ghost in the area will be on them to keep the peace.”

And then Danny, knowing everyone is safe for Christmas, asks “Can I come to your place for Christmas?”

Vlad jolts because A) except for the annual business Christmas parties he’s usually alone and b) wouldn’t Danny prefer to be with his family on Christmas?

And Danny explains what his parents do every Christmas and the next minute Vlad is like “my private jet is waiting on your call feel free to bring Jazmine too.”

Danny is so happy to be away and Vlad goes the extra mile to de-Christmas his home. He does some general lights and winter decor but nothing specifically Christmas and Danny just sleeps all of Christmas Day and hangs out with Vlad for the week because PEACE.

Vlad is absolutely alight with joy because of all the things he could have asked for this Christmas, Danny (and Jazz, who comes with because she wants to support Danny and ALSO wants a break but is more doing her own thing that week) coming over and just hanging out is the best thing he could have asked for.

(Jack and Maddie realize the 27th that, even though their kids said something, that the kids are gone, forgotten in the argument)

(For the first time in years, Maddie and Jack begin to realize that maybe this argument is more harmful then good)

Ectober Month Day 26 (day 2 for the week) - Autopsy/Pumpkin

some more dp content!!

Jas is seriously one of my fav characters from the show. I started my rewatch tonight and god I forgot how cool she was.

Danny narrowed his eyes as the Uber arrived at the church, and he finally remembered the occasion.

“Wait, Mom? Did we just pregame Vlad’s funeral?” Danny asked. Maddie scowled.

“Shut up and act sober. For some reason, your dad loved that miserable creep,” she told him.

“It’s the only way to get through the day,” Jazz agreed, fumbling to open the door and step out.

"Can I say goodbye to him alone?" Danny asked.

"Of course Danny." Jack said tearfully.

Everyone shuffled out.

Danny stepped closer to the casket. "I know you're not dead." He said.

"Yeah no ****."