Love Nikki, a Summary:

My deepest darkest fantasy is that I collapse on the street and I am rushed to the hospital. They perform a bunch of tests and find out I am severely deficient in some kind of vitamin. Then I start taking the vitamin and I become the happiest cleverest person alive because all my problems were caused by this one deficiency

Moreover, everyone gathers around to be tremulously compassionate and discreetly admiring: all this time, you lacked the Vitamin? And yet you persevered?

Happy 1st anniversary to the Vitamin! I appreciate that - though conceptualized as unattainable - the Vitamin is many things to many people:

The burning question about "homesteading tradwive influencer vs. actual medieval farmwife" wouldn't be about who would win, but what would be the final straw that would make Kathrynn - who got married at 21, doesn't know what a chemical is, and who would have sent her children to school if she had had the chance - finally decide to beat the ever-loving shit out of Kathrynn, who got married at 21, doesn't understand what a chemical is and can't spell for shit, but still thinks she can homeschool her kids.

It wouldn't be over feminist issues. Medieval Kathrynn has no concept of "women's right to vote" - it's not like her husband has the right to vote in government matters either. It would probably be about religion. Medieval Kathrynn has no idea what "catholism" is, but she heard Modern Kathrynn talk shit about the saints and decides to toss aside the goat she was castrating and go "that's it, I'm beating your ass."

I'm pretty sure it would be vaccination, actually. Medieval Kathrynn would find out that there's an easy, safe way to keep the babies from dying of measles/mumps/smallpox and that Modern Kathrynn is CHOOSING TO NOT DO IT and would use the grave marker of her third child who passed from the pox as a bludgeon.

^^^^

"What's this? It's Kathrynn with the wooden grave marker!"

never thought I'd say tumblr should copy something from Twitter but tumblr desperately needs a community notes feature where everyone is forced to see when posts have misinfo, instead of the corrections just getting lost in the notes as people continue to blithely spread propaganda

y'know what? the stained glass window designers had the right idea, we need more angels with kaleidoscope wings.

why the fuck would u spend money getting high when you could spend money making people glad

it would be cool if websites let you be an adult on them. the advertisers and payment processors need everything to be Family Friendly though and their definitions of family and friendly are absolutely fucked. but since they're in charge of the Internet now, no one is allowed to be an adult. tiktokers say things like "unalive" and "seggs" because they know death and sex are too adult for online. online is for idiot babies only now because they're easier to market to

oh im sorry you're a trans adult? super ban. you are super banned for life. you have upset Visa's feelings. Mastercard is throwing up in the corner. how could you do this to Google Ads?

personally i think you should be able to afford a place to live with a part-time job

dare i even say that, with how much technology has advanced in america, the 40 hour work week shouldn't be as commonplace and you should still get full-time employment benefits when you're working less than that actually

@funnier-as-a-system

[ID: a tweet by LittleKuriboh (@ yugiohtas) that reads: YGO appeals to the deeply intimate and shared human desire to secretly have a cooler version of ourselves voiced by Dan Green that we can turn into whenever someone bullies us / end ID]

If it's not Dan Green, then it's Eric Stuart!

Be thankful for the guys and gals that deliver our mail

I know we say this joke casually but neil gaiman really is stronger than a us marine to leave his inbox open

I think what makes us all so hype for the Barbie movie is because we are all FULLY aware it's not going to be some revolutionary "Great film". We all know it's not going to even be on par with the best Disney's Marvel film. It's not going to be the greatest film even released this YEAR.

But we all KNOW this. And we KNOW it's going to be dumb, pink, and most importantly FUN.

So it doesn't matter how ridiculous and mid and lacking in brains it is because NONE OF US is expecting to be anything more than that.

We are all excited because we are all tired and we are all ready for a film that has no interest in having academic essay videos made about it and we're all just ready to sit down and watch the ridiculously pink Barbie movie and be entertained.

And this is so great because it means the chance of being disappointed by the film is basically 0. Because all we expect is fun. Nothing more. And it's just really a BIG stress relief to be hyped for a movie you have no expectations of "great cinema" for.

Relax. It's the Barbie movie. We're gonna have a good time.

Basically, I think that if you expect a response time on your text messages comparable to that of a phone call, then you should only text people under circumstances where it would be socially acceptable to place a phone call, and if you break this rule you should be treated in precisely the same way as someone who makes a habit of calling people on the phone in the middle of the night.

Honestly Loki is basically the only morally complex character marvel has tried to write and he's been through like seven different directors' intentions and rewrites and the most fucking inconsistent characterization fiction has ever seen so kudos to Tom Hiddleston for actually pulling a semi-compelling character out of that mess but also for not going fucking feral on every new director who, thinking theyre god's gift to marvel and cinema, has turned to him and said "I think we're gonna do something a little different with Loki this time"

It's so funny to me when you can clearly see that someone just moved from a different sm to tumblr and they have yet to learn about enyrhing about the site, like insta artist will try to add a crop piece when tumblr doesn't need that, or Twitter people that speak in short paragraphs and censor names in the posts with letters and numbers. Amusing

newcomer: sorry for spamming your blog with likes and reblogs!

me: no worries, nobody cares about that here

new rando: oof sorry abt that long post you guys, I just needed to rant

me: bestie that was a 400 letter post

It's a testament to how awful other social media sites are when Tumblr is the sane place now.

its fast fashion to YOU. im wearing a forever21 sweater i got during the bush administration.