cordeliaistheone reblogged
scratchedvinyls
cordeliaistheone reblogged
fresh art
princelestial
More art/aesthetic here.
cordeliaistheone reblogged
texts and letters from Harry Potter
cordeliaistheone reblogged
If we follow each other you have permission to ask me for my number and text me
cordeliaistheone reblogged
How To Live On A Budget
SOME HELPFUL TIPS INCLUDE
- Don’t get an air conditioner, just hang out your window and have the neighborhood children chuck ice cubes at your face
- Instead of getting HBO which costs maybe a million dollars a month, try to find the episode online but worry the cops will come and shoot you for trying to catch the last episode of Game of Thrones, cry hysterically into your roommate’s mouth till he gives you his HBO GO password
- Instead of getting HBO, start screaming constantly in cute baby T’s just like Sookie Stackhouse and then scold people for wanting blood and then have sex with them
- Instead of eating out at fancy restaurants, eat an English muffin with some questionably old butter
- Talk about your Twitter enough so that everybody hates you and nobody invites you out
- Save some money on razors by BAHAHA I know you’ve had the same razor for 84 years
- Instead of eating out at fancy restaurants, eat a tablespoon of hummus, a handful of potato chips, a squirt of mustard, and maybe 46 gummy vitamins
- Instead of eating out at fancy restaurants, die
- Buy some clothes!
- To be fair, it’s summer and I NEED 46 different variations of sheer shirts and maybe some new sandals because I can’t walk around with gladiator sandals I’m not a savage.
- Don’t get a manicure, bite your nails but VERY CAREFULLY
- Go home for a weekend and stare at your mother with wide eyes until she buys you something for dinner, and if you’re lucky maybe a bra or some socks or something
- Save money on bars by sitting alone in a dark living room, watching Food Network and dribbling wine on your chin. If you get wistful for the bar life, rub water (sweat!) all over yourself and squat on the toilet, then play pop remixes very loudly while trying to avoid the various button-down shirts that you have laid around the room that keep asking you if you want a drink. Finally, hold your pee in for an hour while “pretending to get home” and wear heels and fall and hate
- Marry somebody rich like all those hot guys who worked at Enron (THROWBACK)
- Avoid your online banking website because if the credit card bill can’t see you, it’s not real, rock back and forth on your knees, it’s not real
- get a job that makes you tired all the time, like lifting heavy concrete or retail
- Watch so much Law and Order you’ll be too scared to ever leave the house again
- Keep on drinking so you won’t think so much about your finances, jeez, calm down
- Stop cutting your hair just rent it out to birds or Garnier Fructis commercials or something
- Go back in time before college, write the song Call Me Maybe, and dive into your piles of money
- Go back in time to the ’80s where your phone was hilariously huge and you made millions of dollars in white linen suits and cocaine and steak houses a year
- If you do either of those two things, sell your time machine to scientists, you idiot
- Stop buying Cosmopolitan magazine and just recall the 30,000 ways you have learned over the years to please a man from those time honored pages
- Make your Smart Phone a Stupid Phone by turning off the Internet and just doing all the other idiotic things you do on it
- Shave half off your electric bill by going to bed at a reasonable hour instead of staying up till 3am to stare at cats and maybe people you hate on Facebook
- Stop buying Edible Arrangements
- Laugh maniacally about your college loans until they are too afraid and timid to ask you to pay them
- Blow up all the Forever 21s to avoid temptation
- Sue a large corporation for charging you for guacamole on your burrito and totally become victorious like Erin Brockovich
- Find new ways to wear old clothing like spill coffee on it
- Stop drinking coffee just use good old fashioned fear of the unknown to keep yourself awake
- Purposefully get gently hit by a vehicle
- Money doesn’t buy you happiness! Do something for free like going outside or sobbing or some shit
- Give up all your hobbies
- The Countess says money doesn’t buy you class, so cross your legs and watch Bravo until you speak in a Klonopin-like trance of faux British accents and Pilates and freshly-baked Tilapia
- Instead of doing laundry, wear your jeans forever and ever and ever
- Don’t go to the movies, just stare at Adam Sandler’s new movie poster and hate everything
- Sex is free BUT so is not having sex
- Instead of going to the doctor, use WebMD and realize okay, according to this website you’re actually dead
- Accidentally spend money! I NEVER SAID I WAS HELPFUL
cordeliaistheone reblogged
Favourite ‘Sherlock’ quotes (Part 1).
Source: catfromjapan