why are so many automatic soap dispensers so shy

come on, beloved… You know i am here….

my favorite video of all time ever

Whaght are zey doing tu zis poor rat- [gasp] zat is PERVERGHTED ! ... WHAGHT ARE ZEY FILLING HIM WITZH? EE IZ GETTING TOO BIG! HOOOOHHHH...! OH MY GAHD STOP TOUCHING IM ! ZHIS IZ PERVERT BEHAVIOURE! HOOH! STOP IT! AUUW..... WHAT A TERRIBLE DEATH! SsTOP TOUCHING HEIM !

zis is like a medeval TOGHRTURE.

whathellwas even zat . OOOOO MY GAD. oh it- preetty cuute. OOOHHOOHOOHHOGGOOOHHHH OH MY GADDD THGAT WAS VEURY SCHARMING... OOH my gad he is DEAaaadddd... ohhh not ze daaaawwwg... ooooohhh nnooo you are feeling him wiz ze wader of ze hose...he iz also veury shcarming zey look veury cute like zis...i wont liiieee to yoU !

OH!

EWWELIKE A LAMBB...

FRRREAK.

MONSTAEUR

AAUOOUGGGHHH ZIS POOR ANEMAL. OOOOOOG

The author's blatant fetish. The one you picked this book up for. Because you also have that fetish.

the author's proudly displayed & advertised fetish

The author's award winning fetish

the thing i have discovered about being an adult is that every week you will have to spend 100 dollars.

watching death note with my family and after the college entrance episode my mom asked offhandedly if anyone had ever pictured L and light as a couple before. it felt like one single white dove had landed on a crystalline lake in a beautiful pure clearing. no i dont think anyones ever thought of that before

the older i get and the closer i am to reaching 30, the more the people around me try to deny me my age. it’s a constant ‘oh you’re just turning 29 again teehee 🤭’ or ‘dont tell your SO that, he’ll leave you for a younger model 😉’ and i just???? hate it?????????

i spent my entire teenaged years fighting for my life. i crawled through the deepest pits of my depression to cling to the promise of a life beyond that pain. i was so convinced that i was going to die young, that i would never see the grace of my age starting with a 2, let alone 3.

so im going to turn 30, and there’s not a damn thing anyone can do to stop me from loving it.

this post was up for like five minutes and already im being told how wrong i am

fuck you, you can kiss my 30 year old ass

You know what? I needed to read this today

OP IS WISE AND CORRECT!! may we all cherish the gift of age. and for any followers still young enough to hear this: i will also add that once you turn 30, much of the internal shame of turning 30 just...goes away? you will realize how young you still are in the grand scheme of things, and you will realize how much you still have to do and experience and live for. the future is long and beautiful, and the only way to see it is to keep going.

As I told my best friend when he was whining about turning 61 less than four months after having a brain tumor removed:

Congratulations, you've survived another one! Wear the badges of age like bleeping trophies -- survival is an act of defiance!

I grew up with a mom who claimed her age. She fought tooth and nail to escape her neighborhood, survive the Marine Corp, survive and escape an abusive marriage while getting her kids to safety, cancer, etc.

My teachers would tell me that I shouldn't announce her age and this bewildered me. She EARNED every single year. She struggled. Why would she diminish that?

4000cc breast implants :)

I don't know how to tell you this. But the wizard in the picture is canonically Saruman.

#saruman's big artificials vs. gandalf's big naturals

that family guy clip where the dad is drowning and he's like, "since we're all gonna die, there's one last thing i have to say... I did not care for The Godfather" but it's me and how do not care for iwtv Claudia and Madeleine. like sorry idgaf about a white French Nazi lover falling in love with a Black woman. I simply do not care for it and could barely take it seriously. I don't even hate it lmao I just don't care like it's that silly. It's just another example of how claudia deserved better

"Kill them with kindness" wrong. Gengar use shadow ball

If you have Spotify reblog this and tag what your number one song on your “on repeat” playlist is.

Shout out to everyone else who scrolled back up after seeing the reaction meme

A+ weird little dude, but I'm equally fascinated by the choice of music.

As an adult I think me and all my friends should all have matching schedules and work like 20 hours a week and also everyone lives within 15 minutes of each other why is that so much to ask

me, begging, tears in my eyes: please. please just tell me what the book is about. the plot. please

a book annotation on the cover, unfazed: A Subversive Masterpiece. A Deep And Touching Story. The New York Times Bestseller. Go Fuck Yourself

You Cant Miss It! (Says Famous Person you are barely aware of)