Bonus Round 1- Memory “Remember how Dad took in a stray?”

*************************************************************** If only Gamzee had some guidance when he was small… :’)

i drew this just so i could have an excuse to put cake onto joey’s head lol

my biggest issue with the epilogue is where is dad crocker and where are the sprites??????

Day 2 ==> favorite guardian

È stata una scelta difficile ma credo che il dad egbert si aggiudichi il primo posto tra i miei guardiani preferiti :‘3

dad egbert is canonically the cousin of joey claire and jude harley

You know, Dad Egbert is probably the best character in Homestuck. He is seemingly portrayed as an over bearing

and annoying dad. He leaves cakes around, his cheesy encouragement notes are endless and he has many clown pictures and went as far to get John a life sized doll of one.

Later after they enter the session, when we see John’s room again it had clowns face painted on it and degrading words. For some reason John isn’t able to see it till the session started so when we see his room it makes sense.

His dad didn’t have an obsession with clowns and didn’t needlessly leave around encouraging notes; he saw John walls and decided to try and make John feel better by supporting his seemingly love for the clowns painted on his walls but also leaving notes to help his self esteem.

Dad Egbert wasn’t an overbearing Dad. He just cared and loved his son very much.

Hey, what do you guys headcannon Dad Egbert/Crocker’s first name as?

I like to think it’s Joel

homestuck guardians reactions to being told they’re the worst parent ever:

SON, WHY WON’T YOU EAT THIS CAKE I MADE ESPECIALLY FOR YOU? WHY WOULD YOU HURT YOUR FATHER’S FEELINGS LIKE THIS? JONATHAN EAT THIS CAKE RIGHT NOW.

dad get out you’re ruining my life!!! i’m not going to eat your fucking cake, get out!

WE DO NOT CURSE IN THIS HOUSE JONATHAN. EAT YOUR CAKE.

no! you can’t make me!

EAT YOUR CAKE SON, YOU WON’T GROW ANY TALLER IF YOU DON’T EAT YOUR CAKE.

that doesn’t even make sense!!! stop it dad get out!!!!!

Oh no

*drowns in vast tide of feels*

(Source)

Happy Birthday you prankmasters UuU

Pfffffft, this is just great in every way!

John throwing bucket on Jane like Nannasprite did with him, Jane throwing a pie in his face just like Nannasprite did with him, their shirt expressions, and then both Dad’s standing there, pfffff

If B1 Roxy is Grandpa Jake’s adoptive daughter, that means Jade is her niece and thus Jade and Rose are cousins.

Also it means Dad is B1 Roxy’s cousin, which makes John and Rose second cousins.

I have (sorta) debunked the idea that Dad is Nanna/Harry Anderson’s child before but lets do it again.

Nanna was born in 1910, Harry Anderson was born in 1952. That means that when he was born, Nanna was already 42. The average age of menopause is 51 (according to Wikipedia), but lets just give Nanna as a Life player the upper age of 55. When Nanna was 55, Harry Anderson was 13. So yeah, the only way that Dad would be the child of Harry Anderson and Nanna would be to make Nanna a child rapist.

science will never explain the origin of dad

This sounds like a shitpost but seriously how in the fuck did John and Jane bang two totally different people and end up creating the same fucking person

You know since this post has been on my dash a couple of times today and the origin of Dad is still a fandom debate, might as well apply some science to it.

B1 Dad is the uncle of B2 Dad, that means on average there should be 25% genetic similarity between them. However it can get as high as 32%. Given their similarity we can probably assume it is likely higher than not.

We are never shown or given any detail regarding Mr. Egbert or Mrs. Crocker. But given Nanna and Poppop grew up around the same place, it is entirely possible that their partners also came from the same place and perhaps are even related. If we assume Mr. Egbert and Mrs. Crocker happened to be siblings than that also makes the Dads cousins.

Cousins are on average 12.5% genetically similar, but for the Dads that would put them at a total of 37.% likely similarity (if combined with the average for aunt/uncles and niece/nephews). However cousins can get as high as 22% similar and if we combine that with the 32% high from early, it means the two Dads could be up to 55% genetically the same, even greater then the percentage of similarity between a parent and child.