rat cookys :)

MY RATS

can the rat post not be my first post to break 1k please

I hate hate HATE all those 2edgy 4me theories about kids shows. Like Angelica dreaming up the rugrats, or the ed, edd, and eddy children being ghosts, or literally anything that takes a lighthearted and fun kids show and has to turn it into some tragic take of rape or murder or misinformed mental illness. So you know what? From now on I’m gonna do the exact opposite. Every cool grim-dark show is now because of a bunch of children. To get us started: Game of Thrones: A middle-school DnD campaign with the most angry, vindictive DM who has promised to kill everyone’s player characters (and their family) by the end.

The Walking Dead is actually a bunch of kids playing zombie apocalypse in their neighborhood and every time someone “dies,” it’s because their parents called them home for supper.

Breaking Bad is actually just a fanfic the students in Mr. White’s class write about him because no one has any idea what he does with his free time and the running jokes about it got wildly out of hand.

I absolutely love all of these takes

all the saw movies are written by two 7 year old girls getting rid of their extra ken dolls

No fucking way LMFAO

It’s practically 2014 and you guys still don’t know how to google if an article is real or not before giving it 100,000 notes

[ID: Michael Scott from the office with a pained face, attempting to smile. End ID]

(Guy whos never been at risk from systemic violence voice) No i think all violence is bad guys. You know. The cycle of violence. I think both sides are bad!

I'm talking about colonialism not your movie or fandom

I'd say this is an anomaly but seriously roos are sometimes nosy and just need to be in your business, OR they will fight you if you look at them funny. I love them, they're great, but they make little sense.

The fucking horror I felt in my soul of the 3 seconds it took to try to and work out what the fuck this animal was

the humble "like" is oft mocked despite what it does for us. "like, three people" is a vastly different statement from "three people". "and i was like 'what the fuck'" is vastly different from "and i said 'what the fuck'". i love you "like" and anyone who says you make people sound stupid will be killed on sight

Not Karl..

i think that people should start using “in poor taste” as a descriptor again given it is often the most applicable and clearest phrase when discoursing about media and analysis; sometimes a piece of art isn’t actually THE most problematic thing of all time is is. ​just in poor taste (not JUST in poor taste as a reductive take on potential harm but/and as in regardless of intent the impact is this was an offensive or stupid take/choice)

the fact that i'm no longer the same age as the protagonists of novels and films i once connected to is so heartbreaking. there was a time when I looked forward to turning their age. i did. and i also outgrew them. i continue to age, but they don't; never will. the immortality of fiction is beautiful, but cruel.

Don’t underestimate my desire to not wanna

Paco Rabanne by Thierry Le Gouès. 1998

.

I'm pretty sure open portals are against OSHA regulations

God forbid men do anything

Honestly, it took me more than a moment to realise they were inside looking outside, not outside, looking inside.

(Because I've heard of hangars large enough to cause rainfall soemtimes, but not lightning!)

Ma'am this is the space restaurant we only serve bumpy fruit and severed tentacle

that's fine can i get a glass of something bright blue that's bubbling so violently it'd be impossible to take a sip. extra dry ice on the side

Me: Okay, Brain. Think about what happens next in this chapter.

Brain: *Skips three chapters ahead*

Me: No, no. This one, this chapter, the one we are writing right now.

Brain:.......*47 scenes forward*

Me: NO