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Half Orc, All Dork

@chaoticdumbasshalforc / chaoticdumbasshalforc.tumblr.com

You like D&D, Audrey Hepburn, Fangoria, Harry Houdini, and croquet. You can’t swim, you can’t dance, and you don’t know karate. Face it. You’re never gonna make it.
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leaslichoma

Apparently in China peach wood (Along with the rest of the plant) is believed to have properties that repel evil spirits, a little similar to silver in European legends or iron for both European fae and West Asian/Middle eastern Jinn. Taoists sometimes keep swords made of peach wood because of this. This made me realize something. If you took a peach wood stick, and attached studs to it of both silver and iron you'd end up with a club or staff (or mace, flail etc.) that would have the weaknesses of many kinds of supernatural creatures while still retaining effectiveness as a normal weapon (peach is a hardwood and silver's poor edge retention doesn't matter for studs). You could even keep adding new stud materials to get something ridiculous that affects over 120 catalogued folkloric monsters. Since you just need a few little studs you could even get some really expensive materials like meteoric iron (a thumb tip sized meteorite can still cost like 10-20 bucks I think). I could somewhat feasibly make a weapon that affects every monster ever thought to walk the earth, from vampires and werewolves to jinn and jiangshi and even mankind.

Club of Fuck That Supernatural Shit And Also Everything Else

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A happy Fire Friday to you all. 🔥

Today, we have another couple of photos from this years Sha'bang festival thanks to Jason Ruvelson. :)

I hope you all have a fun weekend, and find warmth be it by the glow of the last days of this summers sun, friends, or by some fun times with flame.

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docvalentine

Today in dungeon dragon

the goons were kicked out of O4 and went across the lake to fortress rotunda. gerry of rotunda greeted them and told them that he and his secret order of monster fighting mutants could help them reach the south pole, but only if they proved themselves as friends of the order

luckily, an opportunity to help was at hand. chuck dangerous had been badly wounded after being tossed off a cliff by an unknown assailant and blood mutants don't know any healing magic. chuck was having a hard time "sleeping off" being torn in half and then tossed off a mountain but alti got him up and running with a cure wounds. he explained that the egg he was found with was a Roc egg and it was only a matter of time before the Roc will come looking for it. the gang staged a trap for the Roc and attempted to pin it down, but a second Roc threw the plan into disarray

then there was a huge fight and they won and nobody died hooray

featuring The Blood Hunters of Rotunda:

Chuck Dangerous, Brock Nightride, Huntler Unstoppable, Jexica Sorxery, Diablo DiCasso, Tiger Brando, Stabitha Crushingdale, and Portia Corsair (art by @sephiramy )

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sephiramy

we continue to miraculously not die, can we keep getting away with it??

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What better use of the Enlarge spell is there than to HUG ALL YOUR FRIENDS??? I wanted to squeeze in a last minute print for Hal-con and was torn between a beefy pinup of Karlach or a group pic, then I realised I could do both ahaha. The print version won't include my Tav tho, this one's just for me. I love all these goobers so much.

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Please feel free to add commentary to this post and/or tags.

There is an immense satisfaction in seeing results go in completely different directions than originally hypothesized.

I feel like adventure insurance should include a resurrection and payment for damages beyond the regular wear and tear of adventuring

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My friend sometimes brings her six-year-old to our DnD sessions and my husband (the DM) lets her roll for all enemy attacks and sometimes he will show her a few figures and let her secretly pick what creature we meet next. Who needs encounter tables when you have a first-grader around

She cheers when the monster is winning.

DM: *places an ugly, slavering, repugnant, spine-tingling creature on the battle map*

Child who can barely see over the table: ᵗʰᵃᵗ’ˢ ᵐᵉ :)

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sephiramy

in case you're ever wondering what it's like to be a dungeon master for a D&D game, yesterday when our session ended I had 14 tabs open in my browser; 2 for the current session's notes, 1 for the notes to two sessions prior, 1 to a set of custom fishing rules from one of my players, 1 to revised sailing rules I came up with, a backstory document, an ongoing timeline, a price list, the standard 5e stats to a reef shark and a hunter shark (wound up not needing it), a wikipedia article for both the "catshark" and the "sonic hedgehog protein", a google search asking "how long does it take to cook a goose?", and an image search for "fish bouquet"

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