Therapy is risky because sometimes they'll just ask you their standard "why can't you, though", and you think you're making some good point by saying something like "well if I don't do anything with my life then what's the point of being alive in the first place" and your therapist gets that look on their face and you immediately realise that your dumb ass just got caught, pinned to the ground with your stupid-ass neck between the spikes of a pitchfork, and you are not going to wiggle out of there before you two unpack what the fuck you just said.

sometimes you spend a year with a therapist because they make you feel good and you unpack exactly nothing

Clients’ names and personal information have been omitted to retain their privacy.

My Etsy: LINK / My Society6: LINK / My Ko-Fi: LINK

Different people respond better to different types of therapy, and most therapist will do multiple types of therapy with their patients.

CBT - Most common type of therapy because it works well for all mental health problems.

ACT - Especially helpful for treating anxiety disorders, depressive disorders, OCD, psychosis and substance abuse.

DBT - Specifically created for BPD. This type of therapy works really well for personality disorders, PTSD, eating disorders, substance abuse and impulsive control disorders.

Interpersonal therapy - Created to treat major depressive disorder but is now also used for other depressive and mood disorders.

There are lots of other types of therapy too (:

Gonna add my two cents as a research psychologist:

CBT does NOT work well if the individual has a history of being emotionally manipulated or gaslit, nor does it work well when the individual is working through traumas that have been used against them or disbelieved. CBT can feel like gaslighting, toxic positivity, denial of the seriousness of a situation, or emotional manipulation if not done very carefully. As such, it might be best to avoid it and find something else if you have a history of problems with the aforementioned experiences.

ACT also works REALLY WELL for individuals coping with sudden and "devastating" changes! It's often adapted for use by disability specific clinics to help newly diagnosed patients learn to cope with the limitations on their environments. People with disabilities (PWDs) tend to feel pressured to not express their disability related distress around non-PWDs and, as such, tend to see those feelings as shameful. There's a lot of "I should be more grateful" or "it's not as bad as it could be" feelings around disability as a result of this pressure and ACT is great for undoing them!

DBT is generally amazing for stress disorders and preventing stress disorder symptomatology in at risk populations. It teaches you stress tolerance skills and how best to avoid or diminish conflicts, allowing you to avoid the sorts of environmental triggers that commonly worsen stress disorder symptoms.

Interpersonal therapy is also great for neurodivergent folks, victims of childhood emotional abuse, and children of parents with untreated/unmanaged psychiatric disorders. Essentially, if you grew up with difficulty interacting effectively with and relating to others, interpersonal therapy can help you understand why and change those interactions in the future. Healthier relationships and social interactions are a great way to break the cycle of abuse for those of us raised by parents who were emotionally abusive and/or had untreated mental illnesses.

Since no one has mentioned it on this post, I'd like to add that most therapists these days practice a sort of integrative therapy. They'll take what they find most effective from each type of therapy for each individual problem, and piece together something a little more tailor made for their patients. This is part of why seeing an actual therapist is so important. Not every aspect of the aforementioned therapies will be relevant to every problem. Some aspects may even be harmful to handling some problems. The therapist is trained to pick out these things and adjust accordingly, unlike the average self help book or online resource. But knowing the types of therapies available and what you want to get from therapy is an immense part of finding a therapist that will suit your needs, so please research things carefully and think over what you need before selecting one!

Go to therapy, y'all!

BTW "thought stopping" is both a brainwashing technique and a highly useful cognitive behavioral therapy tool.

You "thought stop" by throwing a label on a thought in order to interrupt it and redirect your mind.

In CBT that might look like:

In stereotypical brainwashing, thought stopping might look like:

Thought stopping can be a good tool! But I think it sometimes gets used the bad way in therapist's offices and social justice spaces. So I want to talk about the deeper mechanics of how to thought stop without accidentally brainwashing yourself.

I think healthy thought stopping is inconsistent. Nineteen times out of twenty, you might think, "Oh, failure is a global label. I'll rephrase."

But one time in twenty, you'll think, "Huh. Am I failure? What does it mean for a person to be a failure? Can other people be failures? If so, what are the criteria? Is the word 'failure' always misleading when applied to a person?"

With healthy thought stopping, critical thinking is allowed. We just section off lines of thinking that we don't usually have the time or energy to be adiquately critical about.

Brainwashy thought stopping may not be airtight, but it is consistent enough to stop you from thinking critically about certain things. Brainwashy thought stopping makes some thoughts forbidden. When you think forbidden thoughts, you feel too shitty about it to think clearly at the same time.

The mechanism for this is usually shame. If you think the wrong thoughts, then you're evil, or problematic, or not committed to recovery.

But you have to think things that might be evil, or you can't resist evil disguised as religious authority.

And you have to think problematic thoughts, or you won't figure out why bigoted ideas are false. (Please note that analyzing bigoted thoughts is very different from stating bigoted opinions.)

And you have to think things that might run counter to recovery, or you won't fire therapists who are manipulative jerks.

Healthy thought stopping is driven by the intention to thrive and think clearly. You hear that global labels can distort thought and perpetuate mental illness, so you practice alternately avoiding the thought and challenging it.

When you challenge a thought, it might turn out to be true. If you're never willing to give the bad thoughts that opening, you might be a little bit brainwashed.

So I went to my therapist the other day, and later in the appointment I mentioned that I like to write self-insert fiction to cope. I also said that I generally hide it and felt embarrassed mentioning it due to the way people treat the concept online.

She said that self-inserting yourself into art and writing is an incredibly healthy way to feel good about yourself, and that she was appalled when I told her about the way it’s mocked on the internet.

So never feel bad about self-inserting or enjoying reader insert fanfiction, 1/1 professionals agree that it’s good for you and that the jerks who say you’re doing something wrong are just uneducated and don’t understand. Never listen to the anons who try to make you feel bad <3 

Have a really nice day!

make that 2/2 professionals. my therapist talked about this too. she also talked about projecting onto characters and said that was an extremely healthy way to cope with things that you’re dealing with and things that have happened to you!!

My therapist also says that projecting on characters is good. She feels like it’s a hook, that if I can empathize with a fictional character whose current situation may be similar to mine, I can then teach myself how to redirect that empathy to myself. “That character sure is having a rough go of it. I want to give them a hug. Wait, I’m having a similar rough go of things. Does that mean I should give ME a hug?” And the answer, my friends, is YES.

I'm gonna ask my therapist about it, so that we have an even bigger sample. But I'm pretty sure he's gonna agree.

All my hospital and psych clinic appointments have been canceled due to the virus. Do they expect me to suddenly take a turn for the better? Oh well, we die like men

I dont wanna be like this but hey guys.. I’ve been without my therapy for two weeks (And most likely will be for a while, I go twice a week) cause the corona scare. It’s not their choice. They are not thinking you got suddenly better. THEY HAVE NO CHOICE. They’re not cancellin appointments to be mean. They’re trying to keep everyone (you, family, co-workers) safe, by not spreading the “possible” virus. Don’t blame them. They’re in this shit with us. We are all humans. C’mon.

Hey dude, I’m sorry if I came across as trying to take the piss out of health care professionals but there’s also some context not added there, and I wrote that post while being emotional and in a lot of pain. I already do have empathy and a basic understanding of the current situation we’re in, but I can see how you interpreted me as both a moron and an asshole since I’m not exactly an articulate speaker when I’m in a mood. Although, insinuating that I wasn’t aware of them being humans too may have been putting too many words in my mouth. I mean you’re free to indirectly berate me if you want though, and anyone else you might’ve been referring to

Hey, I was also bit in my emotions too mate, I wasnt trying to be asshole either. I’ve just seen too many people taking the piss on the people on medicalfield atm (atleast in my country), when they’re really stretching at their limits now. So I wasnt just directing it to you, more like .. all the people? I am sorry, these are weird fucking times we are living now. I hope you all the best during this time and (sorry if this post is all over the place, english is not my first language and I just woke up) I know how stressful it is to be without your medical appointments and what it can do to you, and I hope things go back to “normal” soon. And if you need listening ear or something, just hit me up. I wont promise that I’m a good listener or/and can help, but I’ll try.  I didnt wanna berate anyone, just trying to navigate trough this shit like everyone else.

Ah, I’m sorry for taking that too personally mate. I see where you’re coming from now, and I failed to take into consideration how different groups of people may be reacting to this whole mess. Your message is good and I apologize from taking the wrong think away from that reply. Thank you so much for clarifying your intentions and also for your kind words in spite of everything.

It’s indeed a stressful situation, but I’m glad we’re all in this together and can share this frustration. I also hope that you (and everyone else) manage to get through this smoothly.

This is such a nice post. Everyone is nice, I understand everyone. Why can’t arguments more often end like this? 

I don’t know if I’ll be able to meet with my therapist either. Not sure if he does online sessions, hehe. I just wanted to say that if I can support anyone who needs to talk, I’ll try to.

Don’t have kids if you’re traumatized and it’s going to get in the way of raising a kid safely and healthily and not in a way that’s also gonna traumatize them in a different way. And don’t have kids if you think it’s going to “heal yourself through the purest form of love” children and their childhoods aren’t your guinea pigs to experiment with for your own healing

Wait. Um. Excuse you? 🤨

I think op was pretty clear? Don’t have kids if you’re not in a place mentally where u can give them a healthy childhood. Traumatizing ur kids won’t fix your own trauma, all it’ll do is create more traumatized people. Children are people and u can’t just use them as some sort of fun project to get over your own issues

@my mom

But seriously, go to therapy and resolve your issues first.

oh. maybe. maybe this it. maybe that’s the problem.

I’ve never been dragged so viciously in my whole life. Wow. Me.

Yes. I am very open. To the point, that I think I managed to fool my previous therapists into thinking everything is basically fine. The current one said “you know, you talk a lot, and are open about your feelings. But I think you might have many closed up places”. And like, no therapist has said anything that changed my worldview so much.

Therapists are just…. Common sense filters

Me: yeah so I just don’t have the energy to get up and make myself a sandwich or wait for something to cook so I just. Don’t

Her: why don’t you just eat the sandwich components without putting them together

Me:

Her: you can just eat a handful of cheese and some sandwich meat. You don’t have to make a sandwich.

Me:

Me: what

Therapists finding loopholes for mental illness things is one of my favorite things about dealing with mental illness because it really helps me understand that just because a reaction is Common doesn’t mean it’s Right. Does doing dishes stress you out a lot? Buy paper plates. Do your obsessive thoughts make you worry about leaving your curling iron on so you drive home from work to check? Just put the curling iron in your purse and bring it to work with you while we work on tackling where this worry comes from. Symptom management doesn’t have to look like drudgery.

i used to go days without showering because seeing my body was so upsetting that i would end up spiraling and then i realized i could simply turn the lights out. it took some getting used to but i’ve been showering with the lights off for years and it’s now one of my favorite parts of my day.

do whatever you want nothing is real and there’s no need to inflict unnecessary suffering on yourself just to try to seem “normal”

I love this post

Hmmm

These kinds of loopholes make life so. Much. Better.

One of my favorite stories is this lady had extremely bad OCD. Every day she’d be late to work because she was convinced that her hair dryer was going to burn down the house so would always have to turn around and check it. Multiple times a day even. A bunch of doctors tied to “fix” her of that fear, until one day she got a doctor that suggested she bring the hair dryer with her. Other doctors were annoyed, saying that wasn’t a the correct way to help, but she gave it a go. When she had that fear, she’d look over and see the hair dryer unplugged in the seat next to her and was able to carry on. I think it’s such a perfect example of actually helping someone instead of forcing them into a neurotypical standard.

That story helped me stop repeatedly checking if my front door was locked. Instead of checking that the door was locked over and over I would check my security system app. If it’s on it will alert me if the front door opens.

“…actually helping someone instead of forcing them into a neurotypical standard” should be added to the Hippocratic Oath.

Started reading about the door and I thought they were gonna say they took the door with them

They’re👏called👏adaptive👏behaviors👏and 👏are 👏literally 👏how👏you 👏fight 👏mental👏 illness👏

Adapt. Improvise. Overcome.

Therapists aren’t people who you “pay to pretend to care about you”, therapists are people you pay to teach you how to care for yourself

Me: I am violently depressed.

Therapist: Oh! Sounds like you need to do YOGA! That will help!

Me: *signs up for yoga*

Me: *is violently depressed in Downward Dog*

Me: I hate myself and only see my flaws

Therapist: ok lets refocus on things you like about yourself. This week i want you to try and journal about good things you’ve for yourself and others.

Me: *does the homework* yeah but i still hate myself but feel bad cause i shouldn’t

Therapist: feeling like you shouldn’t hate yourself is a step in the right direction. Mental health is complex and isn’t something that will ~magically~ improve. We have a lot of hard work head of us but I’ll be here to help you.

TL;DR stop perpetuating the idea that therapy is unhelpful because the results are not instantaneous.

FUCKING THIS.

As a psychologist the amount of bullshit on this site, the amount of fucking dangerous bullshit on this site about how therapy is neurotypical bullshit and isn’t worth it and how exercise is pointless and good diet is pointless and that therapy homework is pointless DRIVES ME UP THE FUCKING WALL

Exercise is fucking important. good diet is fucking important therapy is fucking important. WHY???

because pills alone don’t help. they improve the hormonal imbalance (as does exercise and good diet which ALSO are a form of very real self care as your physical being is sorta connected to your mental one but go fucking figure right?), but guess what? the suicidal thoughts, the thoughts of harm, the thoughts of hating yourself, they’re still there.  suicides actually increase when medicated.  why? because suddenly you have the energy to fulfill thoughts of harming yourself.  which is why you NEED therapy alongside pills.

it has taken you years, or decades to create your maladaptive thought processes and behaviours.  that shit doesn’t disappear overnight. core beliefs don’t change overnight. these are the very fucking core of your personhood, your being and personality. THAT TAKES TIME TO CHANGE

STOP ACTING LIKE THERAPY IS SHIT IF IT DOESNT WORK IN TWO SESSIONS

^This!!!!!

Important.