[ on the air... ] runaway

“Okay... some bad news, guys. I haven’t seen LaFonda in... about two days? Since the day before last. So, almost. Anyway, I’m worried. She doesn’t really do this, so... Keep an eye out for a big grey cat. She’s gorgeous. Trust me, you’ve never seen a prettier cat. She’s got a goldish-brown eye and a green eye. 

“If you try to approach her or manage to somehow pick her up she will fuck you up. She’ll shred you at any attempt to put her in a box, so just feed her and call in if you see her... Let me know if she’s hurt. Or dead.

“Fuck.”

As I walk along I wonder What went wrong with our love A love that was so strong

And as I still walk on I think of the things we done together While our hearts were young

I'm a-walkin' in the rain Tears are fallin' and I feel the pain Wishin' you were here by me To end this misery

And I wonder I wa-wa-wa-wa-wonder Why A-wa-wa-wa-wa-why she ran away And I wonder where she will stay My little runaway A-run-run-run-run-runaway

[ on the air... ] stray cat strut

“Four cats isn’t too many. Hell, it’s more like 3 and a quarter, fucking mirelurks fucked two of ‘em up pretty bad. Radar’s got giant ears and can’t hardly hear shit, his poor face is all fucked. Stevie’s fucking blind. Catgut’s so weirdly skinny he only counts as, like, half a cat. LaFonda’s the only normal one out of the bunch and she’s a monster. You know I once knew a woman with twenty five cats? That’s a fucking problem right there. McDonough’s gonna kick out all the ghouls but oh! Please let’s not infringe on the rights of Old Lady Hawthorne and her TWENTY FIVE FUCKING CATS! ...That was mean. She was nice enough. But she’s fucking crazy... TWENTY! FIVE!

“This one’s for you, Three Dog. I know you love it when I talk about my cats...”

Black and orange stray cat sittin' on a fence I ain't got enough dough to pay the rent I'm flat broke but I don't care I strut right by with my tail in the air

Stray cat strut, I'm a ladies cat I'm a feline Casanova, hey man that's that Get a shoe thrown at me from a mean old man Get my dinner from a garbage can

[ on the air... ] house of the rising sun

“Good morning, cats and kittens... It’s not such a bad day! What? Catman’s feeling... optimistic? Yes! It happens! I don’t know. I have one side of the bed, so there’s no right side of the bed. But I just have a good feeling about today. I got up early and watched the sun rise. I talked to my dead husband. I talked to my dead wife, too, actually. The both of them. I still miss them. Five and... god, almost twenty years now for her... gone. But still... I felt, like, at peace this morning. That should last for another hour or so before something pisses me off.” There is a house in New Orleans They call the Rising Sun And it's been the ruin of many a poor boy And God I know I'm one