sums it up perfectly💔 I'm heartbroken for all the people in the us that will be affected by this election, keep standing up for your rights and what you believe in❤️

Something that helps

If you blurt out something that you thought would be funny but it comes across as insensitive, just quickly say, “I’m sorry, that was rude, what I meant was…”

If you say something in anger or frustration, take a breath and say, “I’m sorry, that was hurtful, let me rephrase…”

If you say something heartfelt, but it comes across as insincere or ironic, say “That sounds like I’m just saying it, but I’m being truly honest…”

If you accidentally tell the waiter “enjoy your meal” just laugh and say a quick “so sorry, my brain isn’t working today!” and you will most likely get a commiserating chuckle in return.

Most of the time, the other person will accept your apology with no harm done. Sometimes they even insist they understood what you meant the first time and clarification was not needed. At times, maybe they have a right to be upset, but it never hurts to apologize again so they know that you’re taking their feelings into account.

Repeat after me. It’s okay to be bad at conversation. Knowing how to apologize makes it easier.

here's your regular reminder that if you consistently, regularly get headaches, you are almost certainly having migraines, not regular headaches.

MOST recurrent headaches are migraine headaches.

"migraine" does not mean "extremely painful headache." it is a type and source of pain, not a degree of pain. migraines can also include some or all of the following: fatigue, sensitivity to light and sound, visual auras, nausea or vomiting, dizziness, cognitive impairment, etc. these symptoms can be mild or severe and it may actually be difficult to determine if you have them. (who wants a bright light in their eyes during a headache?? i thought that's just how headaches were lmao.)

this is important because while aspirin, NSAIDs like ibuprofren, and other over-the-counter pain meds can effectively alleviate migraine pain, getting diagnosed with migraines allows for a wider range of treatments and preventatives.

it's also important because, in my opinion, your average general practice doctor is not equipped to diagnose you with chronic migraine. don't go to one expecting them to. a neurologist with migraine specialty is a better option, although a regular doctor can still be useful if they listen to you lol.

my life would be miserable and unmanageable without sumatriptan. and i never would have gotten a prescription for sumatriptan if i hadn't gone to my GP and said, "i have migraines and want to try migraine medicine," even though at the time i wasn't 100% sure that was true.

if you have chronic headaches, they're almost certainly migraines. if no one has said that to you before, let me be the first. start treating your migraines.

multiple times in my youth, i went to the doctor expecting them to figure out and tell me if i had migraines. each time, the doctor asked, "do you see an aura?" and when i said no, they determined i must not be getting migraines. no one ever told me that only 20% of migraine sufferers experience auras. that means 80% don't, yet that is frequently used as important diagnostic criteria! what!

a book i recommend over and over is The Keeler Migraine Method by robert cowan. highly recommend if you're trying to figure your migraine situation out.

Migraines don't have to involve headaches! Turns out I've had migraines my whole life and I didn't know, because it doesn't cause headaches. Rather, I get

I chalked a lot of this up to autism and overstimulation.

I saw a neurologist and now I have medicine to treat my migraines. What I have are called ocular migraines.

Please look into migraines without headaches. You may be totally unaware that you have migraines.

Migraines without headaches are called silent migraines, and they’re absolutely a thing. For me they’re even more frequent than painful ones.

Here’s a test which, while not infallible, has led to multiple of my friends realizing that they had migraines and didn’t know it: Do you feel nauseated? Confused? Like you pulled an all-night even though you didn’t? Or are you feeling just generally off in a way that’s hard to define? Go into a really dark room and shut the door behind you. If whatever weirdness you were experiencing gets suddenly better as soon as you’re sitting in the pitch-dark, you almost certainly are having a migraine.

I’ve mistaken migraines for food poisoning and car sickness. I’ve had friends who have mistaken them for everything from seizures, to covid, to a poor night of sleep, to even just having had too much alcohol to drink. The symptoms of migraines are extremely varied, and very few people have all of them - but light sensitivity is common and a bit of a dead giveaway. If you have light-sensitive anything, bring it up with a doctor as a possible migraine symptom.

ArtVember Day 9: The Dead Boy Detectives

My favorite new show of the year! Cancelled before it got a season two :'( Why does this ALWAYS happen?!

Regardless of their fate in the "real world", these boys are in love and solving cases in my heart.

Support Me on Ko-Fi

The Substance (2024)

tfw turning 30 next month 😓

It's an old tale

@carpediemma made a poll post about which characters would be who in an alice in wonderland au and none of the one's winning are the ones i want so i will now be justifying my thesis

alice - niko. above all else, alice must be curious and kind. she is also afraid, a lot, because she's in a wild new world - very similar of how niko is scared and in a new world (both ghost/supernatural, america, and a world without her father)

white rabbit - edwin. polite yet preoccupied, punctual yet anxious, obsessive yet unpredictable, always dressed smart... the similarities go on. and while i think some of their actions might not align entirely, i think there is a case to be made for edwin shewing someone along, insisting it must be done his own way

mad hatter - charles. playful, defiant to social norms, bit of an eccentric dress style! though charles is a bit less over the top, i feel that in the right environment, he could go totally mad. hatter has a lot of fun but there is this hint of despair to him which to me, entirely emulates charles

the dormouse - jenny. tired, confused, and underpaid, next question

the march hare - maxine. unpredictable, bizarre, reckless, excitable. not a huge character so not too much to go from but i see some loose similarities in the erratic nature - it's not that they're evil, it's that they're so invested in existence that they might stab you

please do not think of the implications of shipping the dormouse and the march hair i will not be held responsible for that

tweedledee and tweedledum - litty and kingham. petty?? childish?? looks similar??? guys come ON there is no more iconic duo in dbda! they're not very kind, they're not anti violence, they love attention- am i talking about the tweedles, or litty and kingham? you literally can't tell.

the caterpillar - tragic mick. appears when alice is uncertain and needs help, prompts her to reflect on her own identity. not particularly nice but is very helpful and kind, in his own way. calm, almost cryptic, slow manner of speech.

cheshire cat - the cat king. im not gonna explain this one

ok guys bare with me for the next two. they're kinda controversial. i could see them flipped and i did flip them many times but this is what i decided on

the duchess - esther. the duchess is abusive to her child (monty), but can be overly affectionate, as well. duchess is hella comedic in a dark way, she's got a fucked up relationship with power (duchess is a slave to the Queen, esther is a slave to the Snake), she's absurdly contradictory (like esther and her contradiction of wronging girls using lilith's gift)

the queen of hearts - the night nurse. the queen cannot see a way of life other than executions. i know she SEEMS hella emotional, but legit, i think it's more this desperate desire for feelings and sensations because she is so stuck in a loop of being listened to. the night nurse is similarly stuck in this loop of bureaucracy. neither are happy and neither have any true meaning to their lives. they both also seem to lack a nuance to empathy (nurse thinking ends justify the means so no need to feel guilty about the means, almost viewing finding the boys as a game in order to feel SOMETHING). neither would not survive a day in therapy

the king of hearts - kashi. foil to the queen of hearts, very minor character. gentle, soft spoken, trying his best, exists more in his own universe than anywhere else. the key difference is if they went to therapy, kashi's therapist would end up getting therapied, and king would just break down sobbing

the knave of hearts - monty. while if esther was the queen, maybe this would be more apt, but this is my analysis so i'll do what i want. the knave is a victim of absurd injustice, is somewhat sympathetic but ultimately a perpetuater of this same system. monty does the same thing with esther & her abuse. he is also young and handsome which, we've all seen joshua colley, i don't need to explain

the talking rose - crystal (with/pre-david.) haughty, mean, cruel, flirtatious. she's not a villain but she's definitely not on your side. she's critical, both of your looks, personality, and general vibe. but she's also just one of the many flowers, kind of how crystal was just one of the rich kids, not really doing all that much

in this version, i'd have when the flower's roots are freed be the same energy as the boy's getting rid of david. moment of self-transformation, free from curse. i will probably make a follow up post on how i'd do the plot, but i wanted to throw that bit on david out there.

[insp.]

Save Dead Boy Detectives

all I could hear was growling, so I stood up to take a look

10 Non-Lethal Injuries to Add Pain to Your Writing

If you need a simple way to make your characters feel pain, here are some ideas: 

1. Sprained Ankle

A common injury that can severely limit mobility. This is useful because your characters will have to experience a mild struggle and adapt their plans to their new lack of mobiliy. Perfect to add tension to a chase scene.

2. Rib Contusion

A painful bruise on the ribs can make breathing difficult, helping you sneak in those ragged wheezes during a fight scene. Could also be used for something sport-related! It's impactful enough to leave a lingering pain but not enough to hinder their overall movement.

3. Concussions

This common brain injury can lead to confusion, dizziness, and mood swings, affecting a character’s judgment heavily. It can also cause mild amnesia.

I enjoy using concussions when you need another character to subtly take over the fight/scene, it's an easy way to switch POVs. You could also use it if you need a 'cute' recovery moment with A and B.

4. Fractured Finger

A broken finger can complicate tasks that require fine motor skills. This would be perfect for characters like artists, writers, etc. Or, a fighter who brushes it off as nothing till they try to throw a punch and are hit with pain.

5. Road Rash

Road rash is an abrasion caused by friction. Aka scraping skin. The raw, painful sting resulting from a fall can be a quick but effective way to add pain to your writing. Tip: it's great if you need a mild injury for a child.

6. Shoulder Dislocation

This injury can be excruciating and often leads to an inability to use one arm, forcing characters to confront their limitations while adding urgency to their situation. Good for torture scenes.

7. Deep Laceration

A deep laceration is a cut that requires stitches. As someone who got stitches as a kid, they really aren't that bad! A 2-3 inch wound (in length) provides just enough pain and blood to add that dramatic flair to your writing while not severely deterring your character.

This is also a great wound to look back on since it often scars. Note: the deeper and wider the cut the worse your character's condition. Don't give them a 5 inch deep gash and call that mild.

8. Burns

Whether from fire, chemicals, or hot surfaces, burns can cause intense suffering and lingering trauma. Like the previous injury, the lasting physical and emotional trauma of a burn is a great wound for characters to look back on.

If you want to explore writing burns, read here.

9. Pulled Muscle

This can create ongoing pain and restrict movement, offering a window to force your character to lean on another. Note: I personally use muscle related injuries when I want to focus more on the pain and sprains to focus on a lack of mobility.

10. Tendonitis

Inflammation of a tendon can cause chronic pain and limit a character's ability to perform tasks they usually take for granted. When exploring tendonitis make sure you research well as this can easily turn into a more severe injury.

Looking For More Writing Tips And Tricks? 

Check out the rest of Quillology with Haya; a blog dedicated to writing and publishing tips for authors!

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Let's make a DBDA/Alice in Wonderland AU!

But who would be who?

**Bonus points for replying who you'd think would be the March Hare**

And lastly....

**More bonus points for replying who you'd think would be Tweedle Dum/Tweedle Dee and any other Alice character I didn't include**

<REBLOG THIS ONE>

Let's make a DBDA/Alice in Wonderland AU!

But who would be who?

**Bonus points for replying who you'd think would be the March Hare**

Let's make a DBDA/Alice in Wonderland AU!

But who would be who?

Let's make a DBDA/Alice in Wonderland AU!

But who would be who?