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ナルト小南
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Itachi is babysitting Sarada! How do the Akatsuki react?
Requested by anon!
Let’s pretend that somehow all the Akatsuki survived to see next gen. If Itachi was asked to babysit Sarada one day, how would the other Akatsuki members react?
1. Pein
Pein: “How dare you bring a resident of Konoha into our secret base.”
Pein: “The whereabouts of this place is CLASSIFIED, Itachi!”
Pein: “And it’s a HAZARD. She might get hurt. Hidan might stab her. Or she might touch some of Deidara’s-”
Itachi: “You sound more concerned for her well being than you do for our location.”
Pein: “I….shut up.”
2. Konan
Konan: “Awww she’s so cute! I love your glasses!”
Sarada: “Thanks! I love your hair flower!”
Konan: “Itachi… please let me babysit her instead.”
Itachi: “No, because all you’re going to do is ask her to make origami with you.”
Konan: “Well NO ONE else will!”
3. Kisame
Kisame: “She looks like the woman Sasuke used to travel with.”
Kisame: “You know err…..Karin. That was her name.”
Kisame: “Are you sure she’s not-”
Itachi: “NO Kisame, she is not, so don’t finish that sentence.”
4. Hidan
Hidan: “Who the fuck is this? Can I sacrifice her?”
Itachi: “No, Hidan.”
Hidan: “Can I at least fatally wound her?”
Itachi: “NO, Hidan.”
5. Kakuzu
Kakuzu: “Children are expensive. I will have no part in this.”
Sarada: “ACTUALLY, I’ve managed to save half of my weekly allowance every week so I can pretty much afford to look after myself.”
Kakuzu: “I like you. Let’s talk business.”
Itachi: “Kakuzu she’s saving for a new outfit don’t even think about it.”
6. Deidara
Deidara: “I thought the minimum age to enter the Akatsuki was like 18??”
Itachi: “She’s not joining us. I’m babysitting for my brother.”
Deidara: “Ohhh she’s Sasuke’s kid!”
Deidara: “I hate her already!”
7. Sasori
Sasori: “Can I borrow her, Itachi?”
Itachi: “Borrow?? For what?!”
Sasori: “I’m trying to build smaller puppets and her body size is PERFECT for a base!”
Sarada: “Ohhh can I?? I love dressing up!”
Itachi: “I….I don’t think that’s such a good idea.”
8. Zetsu
W. Zetsu: “Aren’t you just adorable!”
B. Zetsu: “Why is your name Salad??? Do you like vegetables??”
Sarada: “I…..I like some vegetables I guess. I don’t know why I’m called-”
B. Zetsu: “Do you TASTE like vegetables??”
W. Zetsu: “Don’t be so rude!”
9. Tobi/Obito
Obito: “A female Uchiha. I never thought I’d see the day!”
Obito: “This means the clan will finally be restored!”
Sarada: “Why are you talking about my clan like you know it?”
Tobi: “BECAUSE TOBI LIKE’S UCHIHAS AHAHAHA…HA…Ahhh…”
captainsigge reblogged
Artist: Hedoro ( 屁泥 ), Doujin Source: Click Here.
Hey, anybody still remember those guys? They used to be the big-bad once upon a time…
Obito says “Baka-Kashi” in the first panel. Normally I would leave it untranslated, since it’s an iconic line from the show, but it segways into Kakashi’s response, so I translated it as “Kakashi-diot”.
This is my own translation and it hasn’t been proof-read, so the usual warning applies: This translation is not reliable and it’s very much possible that I got things wrong. Corrections and revisions are welcome!
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Oh but Konan😳
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hidan-chan-my-foot
Hidan, what would you do if you found Pein in a spot you could potentially.."sacrifice" him in?
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Anonymous asked:
Which Hogwarts Houses would the Akatsuki members and Madara be in?
Madara (like most of the Uchiha save Obito) is a highly logical person. He distrusts his emotions immensely, and when he has to make a choice he weighst the pros and cons to reach a rational conlusion. He cut his ties with Hashirama when faced with the knowledge hat he would have to fight him for the rest of his life because of the Senju/Uchiha feud. Despite Izuna’s death however he unites with the Senju in the end, because he knows he can’t win and Hashirama actually proves him that he is willing to die like Izuna did. He’s a Ravenclaw all the way.
For the Akatsuki:
Sasori is also one of those highly logical, very intelligent people. Both Slytherin and Ravenclaw can come across as cold-hearted, simply because they are very realistic and have few personal ties to people. While Sasori is ideed amobitions as most Slytherins, this ambition only goes so far as turn his body in a puppet. That, his science, knowledge, is his true passion. Ravenclaw all the way.
Deidara is well … explosive for lack of a better word. Yes, he can keep his head in a fight, but also gets excited easily and is prone to aggression when provoked. Also he has a certain sense of right and wrong, his own code of honor so to say. All in all that makes im a Gryffindor.
Konan, Yahiko and Nagato in this case can be sorted as one. Yahiko is the most obvious Gryffindor with his open demeanor, compassion for other people and fearlessness in battle. Yahiko is a Gryffindor and he dies like one as well. Nagato is shy, quiet even, but his ideals are almost the same as Yahiko’s. He has more doubts, loses his path and breaks over his grief, but Naruto rekindles his inner Gryffindor in the end. Konan has the attitude of a Ravenclaw at times, all methodical and calculating, but her motivation, her passion is the same Gryffindor as that of her two team mates.
Kakuzu is the stereotype of a Slytherin villain. He is self-centered, doesn’t care for other people at all, is very very ambitious and always acts in his own interest. He can and will manipulate everyone around him if it benefits him in any way.
Hidan despite being one of the “bad guys”, isn’t really sly or cunning. He is honest when dealing with others, and extremely goal oriented. Basically he just does what he wants, says what he wants, and behaves like a brat most of the times. Gryffindor here, partially because no other house fits him.
Kisame has a pretty shrewd, sadistic personality. He takes every meassure necessary to win a fight and promote his own agenda. Other people to him seem to be mostly part-time allies that he gets rid of the moment they stop being usefull to him. Kisame is on the winning team, not forming any bonds in case he has to switch tactics midway through something. He’s a textbook Slytherin, though he less obvious one compared to Kakuzu.
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Akatsuki members and their Hogwarts houses
- Pein/Nagato : He doesn’t really fit in any house (too naive to be in Slytherin, not enough loyality and hard working to be in Hufflepuff, not smart enough or creative to be in Ravenclaw) so I’ll say Gryffindor (he’s quite brave even tho he’s quite weak-willed)
- Kisame Hoshigaki : Slytherin (loyal, use any means to achieve his ends, dermined, fraternity)
- Itachi : Arrogant, obssessed with Sasuke, stubborn, extremist, don’t fear death. I’ll say Gryffindor
- Konan : Hufflepuff (patient, hard-working, loyal)
- Akasuna no Sasori : Ravenclaw (he’s an artist and he loves his art more than anything)
- Deidara : Either Ravenclaw (intelligent, creative, artist) or Gryffindor (hot-headed, stubborn, brave, arrogant)
- Zetsu : Slytherin (manipulative, loyal, intelligent, ambitious, cunning)
- Obito : Slytherin (loyal, protective toward his loved ones, ambitious, use any means to achieve his ends)
- Kakuzu : Either Slytherin (cunning, self-preservation, intelligent, practical) or Hufflepuff (I’ll say Hufflepuff more, he’s very loyal, hard-working, and he’s just in his own views of justice)
- Hidan : Definitly…Hufflepuff. Yes Hufflepuff. He’s one of the most loyal characters in this manga with Kakuzu, all his actions are based on his loyality to Jashin, Akatsuki and Kakuzu. He never does anything for himself, just for the people he’s loyal to. Justice is subjective, and Hidan is very fair in his own view of justice
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Anonymous asked:
What are each of the Akatsuki's favorite kinks or turn ons?
(Aw yeah, now this I can do. Also what the fuck is a designated order?)
Pein really likes it when you dress up for him. Traditional yukata, form fitting shits and leggings, maybe showing off just a little more skin than usual and he’s in.
Konan is really turned on by possessiveness. She won’t make you jealous or possessive on purpose, but in her opinion jealous sex is the best kind of sex.
Hidan loves blood. If you have even a little bit of blood he will drag you off and have the most rough sex with you.
Kakuzu is turned on by tight, revealing clothes, but you can only wear them in private. Just for him.
Itachi has a secret biting kink. Turn an innocent kiss into sex by nibbling his bottom lip.
Kisame is really turned on by swimsuits so unless he wants sex he will not take you swimming.
Sasori is turned on by lingerie and really short shorts, but will never admit it.
Deidara has tried so many kinks he’s so damn curious but what really gets him? Strip teasing.
Obito has a thing for exaggerated hip-swinging. Other than that he’s pretty oblivious to seduction.
Zetsu likes it when you wear flower print clothes. Like, really, really likes it. You wear anything with a plant on it and he will fuck you where you stand. Don’t get me started on what he does if you wear a plant.
