im so drunk ive been walking around barefoot the entire night and i broke my "i havent smoked a cigarette in 6 months" vow. fuck me.
the worst type of asshole is the asshole that doesnt know theyre an asshole
i want kisses. GIMME FUCKING KISSES.
i was trying to have a nice, normal conversation with this guy i know and it quickly went from me saying "i'm pretty heartbroken right now" to him sending me a photo of his pale semi-erect penis. whyYy though!??
I MAKE MYSELF SO HAPPY.
i can't tell if he knows i'm joking or not.. but this hasn't deterred him. he might be a keeper.
my birthday is in 2 weeks exactly.. all i ask for is an abundance of drugs, alcohol, & men. cool?
on a scale of 1 to 10, my desire for you was increasing to a 5, but after this, it's back to -20. too bad.
wish i could liiiiive in bed. forever.
already being hit up to have sex in a public place today. no fucking thanks.
i feel like everyone named matt is an asshole
ARE YOU FUCKING SERIOUS?! LIKE, SERIOUSLY. WHY DO I EVEN KNOW YOU.
i think im part lion or some shit
yeah, because that sounds like SO much fun...