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I'm afraid there's a hole in my brain

@caaaiiiiit / caaaiiiiit.tumblr.com

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fluffysky
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2103lovexx

Congratulations to everyone who moved on without the genuine apology or closure you deserved. That's not easy.

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enuier
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kalynroseanne
Sometimes you’re 23 and standing in the kitchen of your house making breakfast and brewing coffee and listening to music that for some reason is really getting to your heart. You’re just standing there thinking about going to work and picking up your dry cleaning. And also more exciting things like books you’re reading and trips you plan on taking and relationships that are springing into existence. Or fading from your memory, which is far less exciting. And suddenly you just don’t feel at home in your skin or in your house and you just want home but “Mom’s” probably wouldn’t feel like home anymore either. There used to be the comfort of a number in your phone and ears that listened everyday and arms that were never for anyone else. But just to calm you down when you started feeling trapped in a five-minute period where nostalgia is too much and thoughts of this person you are feel foreign. When you realize that you’ll never be this young again but this is the first time you’ve ever been this old. When you can’t remember how you got from sixteen to here and all the same feel like sixteen is just as much of a stranger to you now. The song is over. The coffee’s done. You’re going to breath in and out. You’re going to be fine in about five minutes.
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VIDEO GAMES ARE THE MOST IMPORTANT THING IN THE WHOLE UNIVERSE

Shut. The. Fuck. Up. And go live your life. Not through a computer screen. How fulfilling.

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The tedious task of trying to piece every action that resulted in your existence in this present day. Like looking at the ends of your hair and trying to figure out when each one started to split and what caused it. You start questioning things you will never know the answer to. As if you're looking into the dark questioning what is beyond that and when you step out to figure it out, you fall into a dark hole someone left there because these questions aren't supposed to be answered. Or screaming at the top of your lungs "Why? Just why?" and all you hear is your echo beckoning, over and over again in a taunting loop. All you are left with are your questions that haunt you in your lonesome, tearing you to pieces, trying to break your soul. But then you realize maybe these questions are the best part, keeps life suspenseful, gives more meaning to it. Instead of letting the unknown sending your mind into a constant dark twirl, you jump out, move on, and find your answers in living.

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achillux
“When we hold each other, in the darkness, it doesn’t make the darkness go away. The bad things are still out there. The nightmares still walking. When we hold each other we feel not safe, but better. “It’s all right” we whisper, “I’m here, I love you.” and we lie: “I’ll never leave you.” For just a moment or two the darkness doesn’t seem so bad.”

Neil Gaiman

#quotes
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flammeperle
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larmoyante
Being in love is a very strange thing. Your thoughts constantly drift towards this other person, no matter what you’re doing. You could be reaching for a glass in the cupboard or brushing your teeth or listening to someone tell a story, and your mind will just start drifting towards their face, their hair, the way they smell, wondering what they’ll wear, and what they’ll say the next time they see you. And on top of the constant dream state you’re in, your stomach feels like it’s connected to a bungee cord, and it bounces and bounces around for hours until it finally lodges itself next to your heart.

Pittacus Lore, The Power of Six

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