when I was in the hospital I had the tv on in my room to sleep to and christmas movies were on and they played Elf twice in a row so for a good half of the night I was drifting in and out of consciousness like this

imagination (1963) - harold ordway rugg

"chekhovs cat / schrödingers razor / occams gun"

Chekov's Cat: if you see a cat in the first act, it will probably be relevant later. (example: Alien)

Shrodinger's razor: an unopened box may or may not contain the solution to the story; there's no way to know without opening it. (example: Monk)

Occam's gun: the simplest way to kill off a character is to shoot them. (example: Bambi)

i have been cracking up at this for the past 3 minutes

Chekov's Box: If there is a container introduced in the opening act, it will be opened later.

Schrodinger's Gun: Treat every gun as if it's loaded unless you've checked it yourself.

Occam's Cat: If you hear strange noises at night, it's probably a cat.

Pre-menstrual depression is always depicted as like "He He! I had a box of icecream bars and cried while watching the Titanic!" But in reality, it's more like, "I'm standing the edge of an abyss. There is nothing good inside of me, I'm filled with rage and desperation."

It's crazy that being told how to deal with that is never a part of anyone's menstrual sex education.

how it feels to be online these days

I truly hate the word "unalive." There are so many other euphemisms that fictional Italian mobsters worked so hard to provide you with and you just ignore them.

beautiful compilation from @orc-sign-language

"Joined the great majority" is a good one that I practically never hear.

"Approaching room temperature" is a personal favorite from the medical field.

[ Begin ID: A comment or post on Reddit by @/SierraSeaWitch. The comment reads "Just this week I fell asleep on my morning commute and nearly missed my stop. All of us on the early express bus are technically strangers but know each other based on our unofficial assigned seats, etc. Well, one guy rushed to wake me up. The other asked the bus driver to wait. The bus driver himself was like "doesn't someone get off here?" And when I nearly forgot my coat in my race to get off, they passed it forward. It was incredibly kind and considerate. I brought kit kats for them the next day in thanks. Reminds you that you have a village even when you don't know it." / End ID ]

was thinking about infighting and like. they all see us the same. from the wildest queerest fagdyke to a cis gay guy. we are the same to them. the weird queers are not like. ruining your precious community. we're a part of it

@ exclusionists:

We are all Faggots in the eyes of the Fash. Stand United or Die Separately.

truly few things are more sneer-worthy to me than a gay deeply invested in respectability and assimilation

SEIS fag sex? En esta economia?

People who try to copy historical writing styles don't say enough weird stuff in them. I'm listening to a 1909 story about a ghost car right now, and the narrator just said he honked the car horn a bunch of times, but the way he phrased it was "I wrought a wild concerto on the hooter".

lowkey all the leaves are brown and the sky is grey

small musicians who don't post their lyrics online anywhere. Why do you hate me

They don’t hate you. It’s just hard for them to use keyboards cause they gotta jump from one button to the next and they aren’t heavy enough to actually press them

“I want the inside of this house to feel modern, bright and new!” then why the fuck did you buy a vintage, dark and old house in pristine condition?????

carpe diem!

You need to start unironically loving stupid things again and maybe realize they're not so stupid afterall