2010. A Japanese woman sits down to take photos of her shiba inu dog for her blog. Suddenly, a man leaps out of a time portal. "Sorry, I can't let you do this. I cannot tell you why." She asks: "Is it forbidden knowledge from the future?" He sighs: "No, it's just too fucking stupid to explain."

A BRIEF LESSON IN COLONIALISM

SINCE IT IS SUDDENLY A TOPIC OF GREAT INTEREST.

BRITISH COLONIALISM;

SPANISH COLONIALISM;

PORTUGUESE COLONIALISM;

ITALIAN COLONIALISM;

FRENCH COLONIALISM;

JAPANESE COLONIALISM;

ARABIC COLONIALISM;

AMERICAN COLONIALISM;

ISRAEL;

WOW. SUCH COLONY. VERY SETTLE.

WORDS HAVE MEANINGS. CAN WE STOP PRETENDING THIS WAS EVER ABOUT COLONIALISM?

THANK YOU FOR COMING TO MY TED TALK.

i read the cutest reddit thread today where this 19 yo boy was “babysitting” his 15 yo little sister while his parents were away on vacation and she got this horrific period and needed to be taken to the ER.

and this sweet 19 yo boy was doing all he could to take care of her, giving her meds and water and then packing stuff up to go to the hospital once reddit was like “yeah if she’s soaking two tampons in an hour you should go” - but being only a little older than a child himself, he didn’t know what to pack, so he brought like three things, and one of them was SUNSCREEN.

lmao everyone on reddit was like “you’re a really good brother but sunscreen?? for the hospital??” lmao they are roasting him. also op’s sister changed his name in her phone to “spf” and their dad calls him “bananaboat” now. this guy is never living this down

(also his sister is ok and it turns out their family has some kind of genetic blood disorder)

link to the thread on r/BestofRedditorUpdates

the brother kind of reminds me of that post that’s been going around abt that abandoned five-week-old kitten that was taking care of a few two-week-old kittens that were somehow with him and he was just trying his best but he was so small

I decided to read the whole thing, and I want to post something from later in the thread. This is the OP talking a week later, after his sister was diagnosed with the blood disorder: "Anyway we’re all about to be real familiar with hematology and my mom is pissed she’s been told some women just bleed more her whole life lol. Guess my mom and sister weren’t just exaggerating when they would say they were bleeding out. So yeah ig if you’re a girl reading this and you bleed as much as my sister you should see a doctor. Hopefully no one gets gaslit like my mom did but yeah. Here’s a public apology for being ignorant on what yall actually go through bc I thought you could only bleed so much a month 💀 fully willing to admit how fucking stupid that was lol." And later that day:

Good luck to you and your family. And I'm glad that your mom's medical issues have finally been validated. That's huge!

I want to point out the absolute bullshit across multiple generations here. He wasn't given appropriate sex ed, and that's not even something where you can say "blame the parents" because apparently his mother was silenced for thirty fucking years!! His reaction to the initial emergency wasn't A+ material, but I'll give him a solid B+ for supporting his sister, seeking assistance (he ended up on r/AskDocs while trying to find answers online and mistook it for something like Ask-A-Nurse), and that his response when commenters were like "wow my brother would never, they'd be so grossed out" was "it's just blood." Extra credit to bump him to an A- because once they were at the hospital he advocated for his sister and he was a young man who had no experience with medical emergencies, especially not ones that would require him to swim upstream against a tide of institutional misogyny ("some women just bleed more..." OP's mom, where is your doctor, I just wanna talk). Anyway. Point being. OP, his sister, and his mother all have a genetic disorder that in severe cases can be lethal and nobody knew because for thirty fucking years his mother was told "some women just bleed more" when she begged for help. Misogyny kills, and it does not discriminate between the sinners and the saints.

My fucking cat has figured out how to gently dig his claws into my eyelid and pull my eyes open while I'm sleeping. He does this. It does not hurt. He is remarkably precise and gentle. I however am asleep when it happens and do not appreciate being clockwork oranged by a needy clingy goddamn animal who thinks he needs attention.

I would like to clarify that this animal self feeds and is not being denied breakfast by my sleeping in. He doesn't do this to anyone else. Everyone else simply gets increasingly invasive headbutts and even thats a fairly rare occurence. This fucking cat needs to cuddle with me specifically, And he is decided that the best way to do it is to gently shove his claws underneath my eyelashes and pull. There is no way I can train him out of this because believe it or not shoving your fingers in somebody's eyes to wake them up has the desired reaction.

We have come to a compromise. One that neatly illustrates the reason I'm not wearing an eyemask.

If I have a hair tie on my wrist, my darling sweet baby boy, love of my life and apple of my eye, can gingerly dig his teeth underneath and grab it in his mouth and then back up. and pull. And Snap the hell out of me with the elastic. Again, he is very gentle and precise, there are never teeth touching my skin. This is not a fluke, he managed this several times in various circumstances and positions.

This is worse than a toddler. We are approaching diabolical machinations hitherto undreamt of by domestic felines.

Behold, Prince Shithead himself.

Knitting, 2021 - by Joseph Ford, English

this is one of a [series] and they're all fantastic

joseph ford is the photographer and the knitter who made the pieces is nina dodd (ninadoddknits.com)

(Source)

Alex Jones, the ultra-right-wing conspiracy-theorist, was forced to sell InfoWars in a bankruptcy lawsuit.

YES!!!!!!!!!!

I just saw someone describe the phenomenon of all kinds of minority groups allying with people who want to kill them too as long as they also want to kill Jews and accepting all the bigotry that goes along with that even when it's directed towards them themselves as "intersectional antisemitism" and um yeah wow I think that is a really useful term.

Just Like the First Time.

Hm, I was pondering about the recent-ish trope of Adventuring Guilds (effectively trade unions for protagonists in fantasy rpg-inspired settings, which I’m sure I’ve seen in a bunch of things but the main example that springs to mind is Goblin Slayer to my annoyance but the Hero Association in One Punch Man has a similar albeit superhero-slanted deal), and how mechanically in the setting they exist to ensure x reward is provided for x amount of work/danger involved but in a meta sense are there so the characters don’t have to go looking for heroing gigs on ye olde Craigs Lyst or something.

It’s an interesting idea, similar in a manner to the many fantasy trope-tinged guilds in the Discworld novels of the late great Terry Pratchett, although an amusing idea occurred to me with the idea of trade unions for fantasy heroes.

Like, if there are unions to ensure employment and fair pay for folks clearing out dungeons, getting gnolls out the cabbage patch, stopping gnomes from going through your bins, and so on, then, logically, there much exist fantasy hero scab workers as well.

Folks that the local king or something brings in for lower pay on more dangerous jobs. Folks who are, say, completely new to the setting, out of their depth, and are thrust into a dangerous situation by a seemingly benevolent authority figure because said authority figure is too cheap to hire someone who understands the risks involved and asks more suitable wages for the role…

Y’know…

Oh my god… the entire isekai genre is a way for Big Adventure to avoid negotiating with Adventurer Unions!

I mean, even as the person who suggested it I’d admit it’s really silly, but at the same time even modern capitalism sucks when dealing with organised labour, I’d imagine that in a pseudo-feudal setting they’d be even more awkward about it.

Kid from earth: What? Where am I? Who are you?

Wizard: Do not be afraid young one, I have summoned thee from across time and space to our world, we are in desperate need of a hero to save our world from the forces of darkness. It is your destiny to save our world from utter ruination. Will you take on this epic quest.

Kid: Sure!!!

*Bunch of adventurers kick open the door*

Wizard: Oh shit oh shit no no no no.

Head adventurer: AINT NOBODY GOING ON ANY EPIC QUEST.

Kid: Um, who are these guys?

Wizard: Um, they are agents of the dark lord sent to stop you, quickly run past them and go do that quest.

Head adventurer: Yeah you can shut up now. PAULIE. SILENCE SPELL.

Paulie: You got it boss. *Silences the wizard*

Head adventurer: Look kid, we’re representatives of the local 102.

Kid: Uhhh….

Paulie: The adventurer’s union.

Kid: Ah. Okay I know what Unions are. They have those here?

Head Adventurer: Sure do kid, and we got word that this douchebag was using magic to pull in unqualified under aged non union adventurers from another dimension so that he could avoid having to pay us our proper due. How old are you kid?

Kid: Um….14?

Head adventurer: Come on.

Kid: Okay twelve

Head adventurer: *Turns to wizard* You kidnapped a twelve year old kid to go fight the dark lord? Were you even gonna give them any equipment? Any magical training? Any supervision?

Wizard: *shrugs*

Head adventurer: *Hands kid a scroll* Here is a portal scroll back here, you want to still do this in like six years, give us a holler and we’ll set you up with some basic training and an apprenticeship, Until then, go back to your world and do whatever kids there do.

Kid: Yessir.

Head adventurer: As for you ya douchebag, Go tell that fat gasbag of a king he wants the dark lord defeated he better pony up the cash to hire a real, union certified adventuring party. And you try this crap again then the next kid you summon is gonna have an epic quest of dislodging my boot from your ass.

I love this…

“The Pevensie kids are unwitting scab workers for Big Jesus” was not the take I expected to see today, but I think it’s the take I deserve.

Since we're getting into "did you know that Santa's eight tiny reindeer are a reference to the eight legs of Odin's steed?" season once again, remember: while there are some elements of Christmas (or Hallowe'en, or Easter, or...) observations that are probably pre-Christian in origin, before one believes any of that this-is-really-100%-just-a-Pagan-holiday-with-the-serial-numbers-filed-off stuff, one must consider all of the following possibilities:

Yep.

Also as someone who grew up in a conservative part of FL, the "put the Christ back in Xmas" people are always SO funny to me because, like, 1) my dudes, he is very much still there, ask anyone who is not culturally Christian, 2) they act like it's a fight against atheists and non-Christians when like, no, this is very much an interfaith fight you weirdos, rest of us have no stake outside the culturally Christian atheists and frankly they still aren't paying attention to you, and 3) they are the same people who lose their shit if they think Starbucks didn't go Christmassy enough on their winter cups, tho that has recently had a schism between people who just want standard Xmas stuff and people who want REALLY overt religious imagery (guys. it's a throwaway cup. you want really overt imagery of your religion on a THROWAWAY CUP? cause imo that's MORE insulting to it).

I would add another to the list of Stuff You Should Consider:

9. Sometimes it’s sheer coincidence.

Like, I am saying this as someone who is DEEPLY aware of how much cultural appropriation Christianity does. But just as an example, while “the log on the fire” does in fact come from a pre-Christian tradition of Yule, here’s an incomplete list of “winter festivals involving fire”:

—Chanukkah (Judaism)

—Sadeh (Zoroastrianism)

—Oniyo Fire Festival torch ritual (Shintoism)

—Up Helly Aa procession, another Yule tradition (adapted from Viking pantheism)

—Diwali (Hinduism)

Christianity pretty obviously didn’t get “let’s light pretty lights” from all of these. Another good example of brains-the-same is American Thanksgiving—while it is very much a holiday steeped in Christian hegemony that likes to gloss over or outright ignore some absolutely heinous crimes committed by American settlers, its tradition being set as “we picked all the food, LET’S EAT” is echoed in harvest festivals all over the world, including some in March/April/May in the southern hemisphere. Almost none of them have anything whatsoever to do with each other.

So: yes, Christianity steals a lot of stuff, and lies about more. But also, people are people wherever you go, and some things are universal constants—like wanting to hold up a light to beat back the dark.

Jumblr, we are dancing a horah togther!

Rb to join the dance ❤️✡️❤️

like most kittens Bug yearns most of all for nuclear radiation

Hey, today I learned that my catalogued lack of dating experience is cited in an academic paper

Jokes aside, this quote is how the researchers kick off an exploration of the under-researched concept of “friends to partners” with a call to social researchers to reframe their (apparently exclusive) focus on “dating” as the sole initiating event of romantic relationships. It’s actually a very interesting paper; apparently social scientists and pop culture focus their attention on the process of “dating”, a frankly heteronormative lens that insists on very specific behaviours and scenarios, in which single people market themselves to each other at bars. Meanwhile, in the actual people surveyed in the study, it appears far more common for people to prefer “friends to lovers” as a relationship pathway.

Like holy cow did you guys KNOW that relationship science was dominated by studies on dating? A thing that in which good grades are not possible to achieve?

And it’s kind of good for ME to hear as well! As a (weird queer) person, dating always seemed so artificial and undesirable to me, but so important to everyone else, that it was clearly just One Of Those Things that is programmed into the Normal Hetero Brain that folks like me simply miss out on, forever. But possibly not! Possibly “dating” is one of those heavily marketed products that nobody particularly wants. Like the Metaverse. And nobody, until these plucky social scientists, has been brave enough to call it out!!

But yes. At the expense of elodie glass’s dating history being notably sparse (Stinson, 2021).

It always trips my students up when I say dating (as in the codified, explicit 'two strangers go on an outing to figure out if they're romantically compatible' phenomenon) basically wasn't a thing in French culture when I was younger

I think it's more prevalent now bc of American tv & media making it sound like the One True Path to romance, but it didn't used to be a thing, for the most part, and people got married just fine