request by @chimmysoftpaws
the problem with everyone becoming a reviewer and essayist now is that, plainly and gently, a lot of these people are not smart enough for the position
look at the republican calendar and see which animal/plant/item is associated with your birthday ok. if you're born january 14 you get the day of the cat
solidarity for everyone who was born on the day of the cistern or the watering can or something like that
TWILIGHT (2008) dir. Catherine Hardwicke
CRELOISE + height difference
the thing that sucks most about Joanne Rowling being a terf is that she is actively hurting real life trans people every day.
the second worst thing about joanne being a terf is that the Harry Potter intellectual property is So Much Larger than her. look at the credits for just one of the harry potter movies. every single one of those people put YEARS of time and effort and dare i say love into those films. think of all the people involved in theme park design and operation who put together the wizarding world park lands and detailed them so lovingly and fully
and yet even though the intellectual property of harry potter is so much larger than joanne, she's poisoned the whole well
i feel so. so immensely sorry for every person involved in the harry potter ip who isn't jkr. doubly sorry for every trans person involved. it's fucking sad
I want to be very clear, before we have a category 4 piss on the poor moment, that this post is not saying "it's ok to like Harry Potter still because other people were involved in it, and the ip is larger than jkr" NO! you must fully divest yourself from the harry potter intellectual property!
if you go to universal studios, it's fine to ride the rides and appreciate them on a theme park artistry level. jkr had nothing to do with the engineering. and you're already there for other reasons--riding the rides doesn't give any more money to jkr. but do NOT buy any hp branded merch, at the parks or anywhere else! that's where joanne makes her money! hp merch funds anti-trans legislation! almost directly!
"What about buying indie merch? What if I buy from artists on etsy? Nothing goes to JKR then..." I hear you cry. and you have a point. that's harm reduction. buying indie merch is unambiguously better than buying licensed merch.
but you must be aware that it still makes trans people feel unsafe. you become schrodinger's terf. i see people with hogwarts houses in their bios and i feel a chill. i see cars with glasses-and-lightning-scar bumper stickers and i have to wonder if those people literally wants my wife dead or if they're just clueless.
it's just horrifically sad that so many people put so much love and years of work and artistry and blood sweat tears etc into an IP that is now retroactively so emblematic of transphobia
generally opposed to any new line of 'self care' that involves isolating yourself and disregarding the needs of others because like do we really need more of that in our society. i'm holding a gun to your head and forcing you to listen to your friend's traumatic backstory
also it's ok to be uncomfortable sometimes. like you don't need to drop everything the second you're a little sad.
hey now...
Couldn't have nailed me any harder to the floor if you had a fucking hammer.
dune is so funny it literally opens like
CHAPTER 1
“It sucks that I understand Time Cube and as such cannot avoid becoming a genocidal dictator,” young Paul Atreides said to himself. “For me. Moral complexity is such a burden.”
CHAPTER 2
“Heard any good slurs for poor people lately?” asked the Baron Harkonnen homosexually, knocking back another shot of orphan tears.
this post was a lot longer but I forced myself to cut it back because brevity is the soul of wit and I was getting carried away
anything for you darling
CHAPTER 1
“The fact that I will commit unspeakable genocide and lead a holy war across the galaxy is very bad,” said young Paul Atreides. “For me.”
“I too feel morally conflicted by my role in a ruthless eugenics program,” admitted his mother, the Lady Jessica. “Does that make me a bad mother? Who can say….”
At that moment the Duke Leto Atreides returned home from a grueling day churning out propaganda to convince his troops that he was worth dying for. His regal face was lined with deep moral complexities. “It’s tough when you’re me and everybody wants to fuck you so so bad,” he said. “But that’s the price I must pay for the future well-being of my ancestral house.” He sighed, deep and melancholy. When was the last time he’d thrown around the old pigskin with his boy? Would he ever get the chance again…?
That’s fully-manual ascetic space feudalism for you, he thought libertarianally.
Paul looked around the room and was struck by the sudden and horrific realization that he was the smartest person to ever live, and that even his own loving mother and father could never hope to understand Time Cube.
But that’s a problem for another day, Paul decided, not for the last time.
CHAPTER 2
“It’s a beautiful day to be grossnasty, don’t you think?” said the Baron Harkonnen homosexually as he surveyed the ravaged landscape beyond the window. Acid rain pelted against the glass and melted the flesh off the shrieking peasants below.
“Sure. Whatever,” said Feyd-Rautha, not looking up from his sketchbook, upon which he had scrawled the words ‘I love killing and maiming’ in large bubble letters.
“A-h-h,” said the Baron. “That was a trick question: every day is a beautiful day for being grossnasty. You must learn this lesson well, nephew, if you ever hope to get anywhere in life. Piter, what are you doing over there with that huge and evil brain of yours?”
The mentat violated the Hays Code six times in the few seconds it took him to reply. “I’m calculating a mathematically perfect slur for orphans,” he said in a gay voice. “Just as you requested.”
“Finally! A productive use of your time,” said the Baron, and flipped him off. Without a word, he snatched the pen from Feyd-Rautha’s hand and wrote ‘and oppressing the populace’ beneath the words the youth had already written. “There,” he said. “Much better.”
"Fully manual ascetic space feudalism" will live forever in my mind
nothing more sobering than realizing you'd been assuming a cover of a song was the original...like oh phew if the wrong person found out about that i couldve been killed
HOUSE (1977) dir. Nobuhiko Obayashi
Horrorween Day 21 / 31: The Shining (1980) dir. Stanley Kubrick: "Stanley Kubrick, known for his compulsiveness and numerous retakes, got the difficult shot of blood pouring from the elevators in only three takes. This would be unremarkable if it weren't for the fact that the shot took nine days to set up. Every time the doors opened and the blood poured out, Kubrick would say, "It doesn't look like blood." In the end, the shot took approximately a year to get right."
happy birthday to a decade-old meme.
happy 12th birthday none pizza with left beef
happy sweet 16 to none pizza with left beef
please tag your most obscure blorbo