Psychoanalysis Sunday
Every time I read about Freud I wonder about the parents who sent their kids to him like, “yeah my son is totally acting strange because he wants to fuck my wife, makes total sense”. Like who tf were these people? And the answer is obvious:
It was Orion’s idea to send the boy to therapy. Normally, he would consider such an intervention ridiculous and unnecessary, but in the case of his youngest it seemed warranted. So now Regulus is sat on a cream chaise lounge, staring at the ceiling, across from Dr. Boring, with the PhD in Stupid Questions. “Do you often find yourself in competition for your mother’s affection?”
Regulus rolls his eyes. “It’s hardly a competition. Sirius barely even tries.”
“And yet, I gather, he is winning?” the analyst replies mildly.
Regulus gapes. “Well, yes, and honestly, what the fuck?”
“Mm.” Dr. Boring scribbles a note. Regulus narrows his eyes.
“And now here I am in therapy, when it’s Sirius who’s always causing trouble. Sirius is always fighting with mum. Sirius is the problem! You can write that down, please.”
“It’s important to you that I make note of that.”
“Well of course it’s bloody important. I am cracking the entire case for you, doctor, Sirius is the problem. He should be here. He’s an absolute nutter. You could write a book about all the things wrong with Sirius and you’d probably be famous for it.”
“I’m interested in you, Regulus.”
Regulus glares. “What for?”
“You are my patient.”
“But that’s the thing, I don’t have to be. You can tell mum and dad you think you need to see Sirius, right? Let him come here every bloody week and tell you about his problems so he can stop moaning to us about them, yeah?”
“You seem angry with Sirius.”
“I could bloody kill Sirius sometimes,” Regulus mutters. “No wait, hang on! Don’t write that down.” The analyst raises his eyebrows as he continues to write. “This is so stupid. I don’t know what father thinks this is supposed to accomplish.”
“What do you imagine your father wishes to accomplish?”
“Did you not hear me? Are you deaf? I don’t know.”
“You have no idea what your father’s motives might be?”
“Yes. That is what I said, yes.”
“Would you like me to tell you what your father wishes?”
“I would love that, honestly. Please.”
“I see.”
“Are–are you going to?”
“No. That’s our time. Thank you for coming in today, Regulus. I’ll see you next week.”
“Are you kidding me?”
@regulusarchieblack who encouraged this
