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#the other professor – @bleb-punk on Tumblr
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ow. fern boy

@bleb-punk / bleb-punk.tumblr.com

alex - 21 - ohio - he/him/his ask - submit - plant blog
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alex: i like water.
2:04:38 PM godric : So do I. It's wet and sloshy.
2:05:02 PM alex: like the inside of a duck!
2:05:14 PM alex: err
2:05:45 PM alex: well
2:05:46 PM alex: that is
2:05:52 PM alex: i have never actually seen the inside of a duck.
2:06:00 PM godric : nor have I
2:06:12 PM alex: we should rectify this.
2:06:55 PM alex: do you know any ducks that want to be autopsied
2:08:04 PM godric : I don't know any ducks
2:08:10 PM alex: oh.
2:08:26 PM godric : you can buy ducks, but they're for cooking
2:08:42 PM alex: I'm aware.
2:09:27 PM godric : so I've eaten a duck
2:09:31 PM godric : not an entire duck
2:10:14 PM alex: I've eaten a duck
2:10:18 PM alex: they have really fatty skin.
2:10:29 PM godric : I didn't notice
2:10:35 PM alex: i like it, i'm just saying.
2:10:38 PM alex: It helps them float!
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godric : then my mum married my dad, and my dad's parents gave me this children's bible for christmas
9:30:27 PM godric : I read it, and was like "WHY DID NOBODY TELL ME ABOUT THIS, I NEED JESUS!"
9:30:34 PM alex: srsly?
9:30:50 PM godric : Then my mom was like "What did Jesus ever do for you?"
9:30:53 PM godric : and I was like "oh"
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alex: baby jesus doesn't even care
alex: because he's busy
godric : no, of course baby jesus didn't care
alex: baby jesus just wants his nappy changed
godric : but everyone else does
godric : and nice milk
godric : and people to stop giving him weird-smelling substances
alex: he doesn't understand that gold is an investment
godric : because he's a baby
alex: but he's baby god
alex:i guess he doesn't care about earthly possessions
alex: because he doesn't have object permanence yet
godric : nor can he see very well
godric : it's all a blur
alex:i feel like maybe if there is a god
alex: he's baby jesus
alex: and thus doesn't care
godric : yes
alex: and everything is blurry and impermanent
alex: also imagining giant cosmic babies is fun
godric : but nonetheless, baby god stares into your soul
godric : yes
godric : it is
godric : it is very fun
godric : oh wow
godric : imagine a giant cosmic baby giggle
alex: imagine a giant cosmic placenta
godric : I think there's a nebula for that...
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alex: i'm sorry you can't practice violin
alex: i wish i could help by like
alex: brining you
alex: SHIT I MEANT BRIBING
godric : YES, DUNK ME IN SALT WATER
godric : but this is a pickle I want out of
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more harry potter nonsense

godric : Dom is the Malfoy
alex:haha no
alex:he's not
godric : hmm...perhaps not really
godric : it's not always easy to find a parallel
godric : Malfoy is too cowardly
godric : no, he's Tom Riddle
godric : fuck
alex: wait
alex: tom riddle what
alex: godric what
godric : well, who do you think he is?
alex: hmm
godric : if you have to match him to one character
godric : think about it
alex: carrow
alex: definitely a carrow
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godric : If I were at Hogwarts, I'd probably do really well in DADA and potions, fine in transfiguration and charms, fuck everything else
alex: HERBOLOGY
alex: FUCK YOU
alex: FUCK YOU
godric : hahaha
godric : you're Neville
godric : ZOMG
godric : you're such a neville
godric : Neville's awesome, though
godric : but you're neville
alex: Nope.
alex: Incorrect.
godric : then who are you?
godric : you want to be malfoy
godric : I know it
alex: I AM THE VENEGANCE
alex: I AM THE NIGHT
alex: I AM BATMAN
godric : hahah
godric : no, you're the Neville
alex: nope
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