Captain of the good ship, Je T'Emily

My theory of adhd management is that in order to focus there are 4 things that need to be sufficiently occupied:

And if you aren’t occupying them enough or there’s too many things demanding the use of one, it’ll start to wreck havoc on your ability to do things.

So for example, listening to a podcast. This occupies your ears and brain as you focus on both listening and processing what you hear, but it leaves your hands and eyes completely without anything to do. If you tried to sit down and just listen to a podcast by itself you’d probably get unbearably bored and stop doing it.

But if you pair that activity with something that uses your hands and eyes, like a craft, household chore, or commute, suddenly you’re fully plugged in and can in fact focus better on both tasks than you could if you tried doing them separately.

It’s also why you can’t listen to a podcast while doing homework; you’re trying to use your brain for two different tasks. To occupy your ears while doing homework (which is already using eyes, brain, and hands) you need something for your ears that doesn’t require your brain: music. Specifically music that doesn’t use too much brain power, which is why some people prefer instrumentals or songs in other languages.

Hyperfixation and sensory overload change this by moving the threshold for how much sensory input you need to be able to function. If I’m extremely focused on a craft project (eyes, hands, brain) I might not even need something for my ears; my interest in the project makes up for it. If i’ve had a very overwhelming day, trying to listen to an audiobook while I do some stretches could be too much to process. My brain needs a break.

Video games, which pretty much universally occupy all 4 areas, are basically instant, easy focus wrapped up in a neat little bow. No wonder adhd-havers tend to love them.

If you’re struggling with a task, try looking at which areas it occupies and which are left unattended. Then try to find something enjoyable to fill those gaps, and see if that helps.

Littlepuddins.ie

Because I'm a bit older (late 40s) I have a different view on the whole debate about whether autism is a disability or not.

I wasn't diagnosed with autism until a year ago (and ADHD 6 months ago), but let's pretend for a moment that I had been diagnosed as a child or as a teenager. And then let's pretend that someone had asked me in my early twenties if I thought autism was a disability.

I would have absolutely denied that. I would have stepped on top of the biggest soap box I could find and shouted that autism was most certainly NOT a disability.

Because in my early twenties I was living my best life. I was married, we'd bought a house, I worked full time, I had good friends and interesting hobbies. I might be autistic, but that didn't stop me from living a perfectly normal life.

Except that it was. I just didn't realize it yet. I was constantly overstimulated without realizing it. And even when I did realize it I just pushed through it, because after all I wasn't disabled.

But your brain can only take so much chronic overstimulation before it just shuts down. I was in my mid twenties when I had my first nervous breakdown. Suddenly I couldn't do the things anymore that I wanted to.

It took me 9 months to recover from that, and that was far too fast, mostly driven by my ADHD which demanded I get my brain back online asap. So I went back to work because I was a perfectly abled young woman after all.

But I didn't change anything that had caused me such overstimulation in the first place, and thus it came back full force and after 18 months I once again reached my breaking point and had a nervous breakdown, this time with added depression.

I haven't worked again since that second breakdown over 20 years ago. I'm officially declared disabled, yet it took me another decade (!) to accept that yes, I really am disabled. The autism and ADHD was a mystery still at that point, but I had officially been diagnosed with depression, anxiety disorder and PTSD. All courtesy of me desperately trying to lead a perfectly normal life for a few years in my early twenties.

Now I know what's going on in my brain. Now I'm starting to understand what my limitations are. And now I know that yes, I really am disabled and that there are plenty of things I can't do like most people can. Certain noises scramble my brain, people exhaust me and it takes me all the energy I have to get myself through a day in one piece. I know this and I accept this.

But now, every time I see a neurodivergent someone in their late teens or their early twenties step up onto a soapbox to loudly proclaim they're not disabled, my heart aches for them because I was once where they are now.

And I hope with all my heart that they will be able to live their lives without ever breaking down, but I also know that there's a chance they'll meet their mental limits sooner or later and learn what it means to be autistic in a very confrontational and devastating way.

Because to be neurodivergent means that you have a brain that needs more attention and care than that of a NT person. You need to learn your limitations, because if you don't those limitations will catch up with you when you least expect it.

And because of that extra care that our brains need, autism is a disability, whether it affects you now or in the future or hopefully never at all.

Because to be neurodivergent means that you have a brain that needs more attention and care than that of a NT person. You need to learn your limitations, because if you don't those limitations will catch up with you when you least expect it.

Read it, read it again, internalise it. We all reach a limit at some point, but if you understand why, if you frame it as 'I have a disability and I have different needs' you might be able to prevent the worst of it.

Thanks for sharing your story, OP. I had the same experience in my 20s and I think a lot of other ND people have been there too.

rare vent art from a few months ago

I feel this!!! Also love how you muted the color along the way, I think it makes it that much more impactful!

This is the thing!

adhd + music moods: 

So this post was directly beneath this and I thought it was just a continuation

When I need to focus I listen to atonal dissonance, because there are no words and no patterns for me to get my head stuck in

Well this post was right under this one and I’m a lil speechless

I thought this was everyone I thought this was everyone I thou-

SOMEONE PUT IT INTO WORDS

[Image Description: A screenshot of a tweet by @bovibaee reading 'to this day my mom is like "I don't think you have ADHD, I think you just gotta to focus a little" I understand your Honda Covic brain can start on command mother but I have a unicycle for a frontal lobe and the devil rides the pedals']