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i'm always a [redacted] for shakespeare

@birdfrenchforbird / birdfrenchforbird.tumblr.com

main for @nrivanwrites | they/them | 23
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My adaptation of the God of Arepo short story, which was originally up at ShortBox Comics Fair for charity. You can get a copy of the DRM-free ebook here for free - and I'd encourage you to donate to Mighty Writers or The Ministry of Stories in exchange.

Again it's an honour to be drawing one of my favourite short stories ever. Thank you so much for the original authors for creating this story; and for everyone who bought a copy and donated to the above non-profits.

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animentality

If you want to be able to do a thing, you need to do the thing. If you want to be able to keep doing a thing, you need to keep doing the thing.

This is a fundamental truth and it fucking sucks.

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last night I conceived of a truly diabolical plan of pointless and petty evil and I shall have such fun putting it into action. a little birthday present to myself.

so the evil plan was to invite my friend who Deeply Hates Boardgames™️ over for a little party and, once everyone was seated at the table, produce a copy of Dune Imperium and say “finally we have enough players!”

I was going to wait for their face to crumble in horror and dismay while I whined that I was a little birthday boy and I really wanted to play the game before I lifted the lid and revealed that it contained only a cake, at which point I would laugh maniacally

only instead of protesting, my poor sweet loyal friend only sighed in resignation and braced themself for a tedious board game… out of love for me… I literally bought two empty board game boxes for the express purpose of tormenting my best buddy and how am I rewarded for my troubles? with gentle indulgence and forgiveness. disgusting.

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This is an incredible story.

A man assassinates a former prime minister and gives his demands to the government who turn around and go “Actually yeah, these are quite a good ideas.”

By far the most successful assassin in history, tbh. It's like if someone bodied Reagan and a month later we got police/drug reforms

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me: i really dislike my name, i should go by a better name that i like more. like griffin. thats an awesome and very good sounding name that i could identify with

me:

me:

me:

me: but what if people think im griffin mcelroy factkin,

you both make an excellent point

you all were wrong and i was right

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“oh no, my audience has begun to guess the big twists of my story and are accurately predicting what will happen!”

incorrect response: write the rest of the story to be as twisty, shocking and counter to expectations as possible, regardless of whether this is a logical or satisfying way for the plot to go

correct response:

can someone elaborate on the “make hoax” and “post angry tweet about “leak”“ part. i’m stupid and don’t understand things

sure!

(you’re not stupid. I posted this thinking it would amuse a handful of mutuals who all knew the context and that would be about it, so I didn’t think about providing any other explanation. I had no idea it would spread this far.)

I’ll start from the very beginning just to be thorough. so this is Alex Hirsch, creator and head writer of Gravity Falls, a show which had a big focus on mystery, conspiracies, codes and ciphers, etc. the whole plot is kicked off by one of the main characters finding a mysterious old journal in the woods, which detailed all kinds of weird and supernatural things, but then ended abruptly with the author saying they had to hide the journal because they were being watched. the central driving mystery of the show, therefore, was the question of who wrote the journal and what happened to them.

now, the thing about Gravity Falls is that, while it must be said that the writers weren’t always quite as sure of their plans as we tend to like to think they are, it is very much a fair play mystery, with legitimate clues to what was going on. but the writers were caught off guard by how quickly the show attracted a dedicated audience, including a lot of people outside the primary presumed demographic, who started solving the clues faster than expected. so some of the fans were able to correctly guess who the author was before it was revealed in the show, and the theory started spreading. this put the writers in something of a panic, because this was THE mystery that the whole story revolved around, with ¾ of the show building up to the dramatic reveal in the middle of season 2. they wanted it to be a mystery that could be figured out, sure, but they weren’t prepared for people to solve it so far in advance of when it was planned to be revealed, which would have really taken away from the big moment. they weren’t going to change the main story itself, but having been caught unaware by how much attention the fans were paying, they wanted to up the ante and make the mystery more complex to solve going forward–but first they needed to buy some time and throw the fandom off the scent for a little longer.

hence, Alex’s plan as described above. they whipped up a fake shot that appears to give away the identity of the author as being another character in the show, put it on a screen in the studio as if it was a real animation frame, took a picture of it, and ‘leaked’ it online. it was initially decided to be a hoax (albeit, I think, presumed to be a hoax originating from outside the production team), until Alex posted this tweet:

…before quickly deleting it (though not so quickly that it didn’t get seen, of course).

it worked well enough to distract most people for a while, and wasn’t revealed as a hoax until a year later, when an episode aired that definitively proved that the supposed screenshot could never have happened, at which point Alex owned up to the whole thing as seen in the tweet above. by then the episode with the real reveal wasn’t far off, and while people did still work it out ahead of time, it was more of an “OH MY GOD I KNEW IT!” moment than a “booooooring, we’ve known that for ages” moment, which of course was what the writers wanted all along.

personally I find this a fascinating approach to dealing with the problem of spoilers, because it doesn’t affect the story itself at all; if you watch Gravity Falls today–or if you were watching it when it aired without any significant contact with the fandom–you’d never know about it. ultimately, the problem the writers were facing wasn’t that some people might guess the answer to the mystery–they never wanted to make it completely impossible to predict–so much as it was that they hadn’t designed the story to stand up to so many people working on the puzzle together, which resulted in a sort of total output of puzzle-solving ability that far outstripped the capability of any one solo human being. so their solution is something that’s very much targeted toward delaying that group problem-solving, without actually affecting the experience of any individual person watching the show.

plus, it’s very in keeping with the overall tone of the show.

and now you know!

if your audience guesses the ending of your story

don’t:

  • change the ending

do:

  • gaslight them
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anneemay

Did you know this is happening now? They sent an aid truck then an hour later, they raided the shelter and burned the aid and killed the civilians

13 November 2024

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fan-art-ic

I heard there was fresh meat, fresh vegetables, the BEST food possible brought in DIRECTLY to the school, unlike how the IOF frequently lead aid trucks down the worst paths, so it go there safe, all the more to be the best bait possible.

Yes :(

This is so fucking evil

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There are a fair few faux feminist statements I hate, but “We are the daughters of the witches you couldn’t burn” is one of them.

Historically inaccurate understanding of both who was persecuted by the witch trials and how those persecuted were typically dealt with? ✅️

Trivialising the torture and live immolation of real actual people by implying they somehow weren't strong or clever enough to avoid being burned at the stake? ✅️

Invoking a legacy that categorically does not belong to them in an attempt to claim an oppression they and their ancestors never faced? ✅️

I never actually explained exactly why I hate this phrase and the previous commenter got most of it down.

The first two point? Yeah, exactly.

Also a lot of people are talking about Salem, which, fair I guess American website, but I was specifically thinking about the North Berwick Witch Trials of 1590 which certainly wasn’t started to “dethrone powerful women” as certain people have claimed.

It started because King James - a very pious Protestant who spent almost his whole childhood in various places as a hostage which irrevocably fucked him up mentally - went to Demark and there was told about their witch trials.

He went home and nearly drowned in a massive storm just off the coast of Edinburgh. Terrified someone was trying to kill him via witchcraft, he charged the local authorities to find the perpetrators.

Men and women were accused, tortured, and burnt - they included a very well respected schoolmaster called Dr Fian and local healer Agnes Sampson. There was even an earl, Francis Stewart, who was accused and arrested, but he managed to escape and was exiled.

In the Finnish and Icelandic witch trials it was primarily men who were accused and killed; one of Iceland’s trials was an outside job to strength Christianity whereas another was a rich woman who got sick and then condemned a lot of men (including a father and son) to death.

“We are the daughters of the witches you couldn’t burn” is a trite phrase which very much minimises the horror of these many, varied nightmarish events. I’m not saying don’t commemorate them, not to remember their legacy or respect them, but people didn’t survive because they were special or even (usually) fought back in anyway.

They survived out of luck. There’s nothing noble about the survival.

I hate the phrase because it feels like a kick in the teeth from someone surrounded by that history and those legacies. It’s not a trite little phrase to put on your shirt when you know Jack-shit about it.

And to add another point: I’ve only seen this phrase really clung onto by transphobes recently and that brand of gender essentialism was part of why women were killed.

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alexseanchai

nobody was burned in Salem anyway, they were all hanged

except the one who iirc admitted to neither innocence nor guilt and had probably figured out by then that part of the point of the whole shitshow was legal theft of land from the accused witches and their heirs, and he wasn't going to play along even if that meant (as indeed it did) a much more painful death than hanging, but he wasn't burned either, he was crushed to death

Yeah the only commemoration in Edinburgh of witch burnings there is the “Witches’ Well” plaque, which sort of tries to mark the killings out as unjust but still kind of implies the women (bc while some men were killed over the years in Scotland it was by a pretty large majority women, assuming the Oxford Handbook of Witchcraft in Early Modern Europe and the Americas has it right, which I trust they do—I think across Europe and the Americas it was ~70% women, with the men concentrated in Scandinavia) did something spooky.

They did not. The way most Scottish women were brought up on charges was via kirk sessions (church-based decision-making by men with authority in local-level congregations) being passed upwards to courts. Those local decisions on accusations made by citizens were often based on women already marginalized or disliked within their communities: older women, disabled women, widows, sometimes Romani women or Jewish women, even just ones who were socially on the outs/generally disliked or perceived as “nasty” or potentially-vengeful might be accused of cursing someone.

A lot of witch panics were functionally part of the same conspiracy theory about a sect (sometimes portrayed as exclusively female) of Satan-worshiping witches seeking to create as much havoc and misery in the world as they could before the second coming, including by destabilizing governments and doing things like causing storms or hail which would destroy crops. A lot of the hallmarks of what witches were “like” and what they “did” were rooted in antisemitic blood libel, a lot of which still appears in present-day conspiracism (everything from child-murder libel to “Jewish space lazers cause climate change”).

James I became a conspiracy theorist (like, literally thought They were conspiring against him), partly thanks to the Danes. So were the Danish royals. And they could do whatever the fuck they wanted. They had the capacity to get large numbers of people killed quickly, and those trials are most highlighted. But especially because Scottish witchcraft belief largely didn’t involve covens and group sabbaths (the way, eg England did, which is what allowed stuff like the East Sussex trials to spiral into huge groups of people being accused really fast), there is a much slower, less-acknowledged drip of accusations and executions over centuries and when talking about the “witches you couldn’t burn” claims, I want to highlight cases like this— where one or at most a couple of people (usually women, because it’s not as simple as misogyny, but misogyny is involved) were accused by their community: by their neighbors and church turning on them because someone got suddenly sick, or unexpectedly had a stroke or seizure, or their crops failed, or... etc. Of the nearly-4000 victims of witch hunts in Scotland, most were not put to death by James I for conspiring against him.

Not everyone who made these accusations was the equivalent of a Q-Anon-er. Some were; others were grifters (“witchfinders” who wholesale made up a job where they told lies to get people killed on purpose for money); but it’s very likely that most of them were to some extent taking out paranoia about people in their own communities who they already disliked via a particular type of rising social hysteria.

The reason this matters: successful accusations are about accusers outnumbering or being more powerful than the accused** (see “why kings can do whatever they want” above). And the biggest place where the pseudofeminism of the initial claim falls apart is that men were responsible for charging and carrying out trials, but they most certainly did not have a monopoly on making accusations, or the emotions and beliefs which led to them being made. Women participated in that too.

The communities who accused these people were culpable as well as the justice system.

So, no; you/we are not the daughters of the witches other people couldn’t burn.

We’re much more likely to be descended from the people who burned them.

And in an era where conspiracism, large-scale hysteria and a sense that everything is falling apart, we should really, really not forget that.

Most of my information is from the Oxford Handbook mentioned above and various writings by Julian Goodare, as well as the very-useful Survey of Scottish Witchcraft, a searchable database that tracks all of the nearly-4000 charges and trials and allows people to survey data like demographics of the accused, nature of ostensible crimes, and what happened to them.

I also recommend Dr. Justin Sledge’s stuff over on YouTube (his channel is Esoterica); he has some useful primers on the history of European witchcraft belief (there’s a whole playlist by topic!), where it came from, and the “elaborated theory” developed in texts like the Malleus Maleficarum. It’s also good for a brief overview of how violence was enacted differently in different regions (eg Germany, Scandinavia, North America). I will admit I’m most knowledgeable about Scotland and England but since they were mentioned I feel my comment might still be useful

*(Side notes: the crimes for which stake-burning was the punishment in England and Scotland were heresy or (for women) high or petty treason (men got hanged drawn & quartered for high treason); these charges could definitely overlap with allegations of witchcraft, and particularly James I’s obsession with witches as potential assassins made for a high treason + witchcraft combination. Most people burned in the Americas for so-called petty treason were enslaved people who’d defied or killed their masters).

** and this is why stuff like calling backlash to JKR a “witch burning” offends me so much. She’s a billionaire and a massive political donor to a cause whose entire goal is to persecute a legally and social marginalized group of women. She is not being institutionally victimized by those more powerful than her. She’s doing fucking fine.

It's also a problem considering that, globally, people are still harmed and killed for being witches.

A really interesting podcast called, well, "Witch" on BBC Sounds, actually went into this. There are African organisations who try and help people who are accused of being witches - as in, they're accused of cursing people with The Evil Eye, or of bringing plague and misfortune on their village, that sort of thing - and a lot of their activism is based around the idea that someone is a witch in this specific way isn't real and doesn't exist.

As a result, they have to keep telling white European neo-pagans to shut up and stop flooding their DM's with complaints about "Stop saying witches aren't real because I'M a witch!", because yeah, you can identify as a witch, that's fine - but they're trying to stop people from being actually tortured and murdered because a neighbour's children got the flu, this has nothing to do with white neo-pagans getting to self-identify as witches.

This clinging to a purely European-American context harms people in the here and now. They're NOT the "daughters of the witches they couldn't burn", they're normally the people who care more about their own feelings than they do the lives of other people.

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stuckinapril

Is it not completely insane and mind blowing that a few days ago just marked a solid year of this and we still get lukewarm headlines by mainstream media about how Israel is now ACCUSED of attacking Gaza hospitals (w no actual penalties for it)…. Think pieces by the New York Times that do their absolute best to tiptoe around the subject, if not outright fail to address it…….. and this is most insulting of all but I even saw more than one headline “honoring the memory” of the IOF soldiers who died in a recent attack…… and this all sounds made up but it’s not. It truly is all you see when you look up the news. Truly nothing has changed

Physically and mentally and spiritually sick of all the posturing and virtue signaling w nothing to show for it, so guys I’m asking that you please donate to Marah’s fundraiser. This fundraiser comprises Marah’s family, her brother’s family, and the families of her married sisters. It actually feels hard to breathe whenever I read up on how their tents flooded, or on how the children woke up to the bombing 3 tents away, or how her little nieces and nephews might not be able to survive Gaza’s cutting winter. I don’t want this to be a case where people give this family attention only when a tragic death has occurred. Please please spread this campaign and donate any amount you can. These are literal children living in the midst of death and destruction and it’s really just not fair

Marah has been so proactive in communicating on tumblr in order to advocate for her family and all her loved ones, please continue to support her family's campaign. $20,457 raised of the total 50k goal as of Oct 11, that's almost at the halfway mark.

every single day in Gaza is marked with uncertainty and danger, as weather grows colder a myriad of illnesses get more common as well. Every small donation goes a long way

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duncebento

please donate to marah!!!🩷🩷 her campaign was vetted by @90-ghost . the violence near her has been getting worse recently

We are approaching history. 4-11 The anniversary of the martyrdom of my older brother Muhammad in northern Gaza in Beit Hanoun. The city of Beit Hanoun is now under siege as it was under siege on 4/11/2006. The anniversary of the martyrdom of my brother Muhammad at the hands of the Israeli occupation is approaching...and my family is still threatened by death from the same enemy

We live a few meters away from Al-Aqsa Martyrs Hospital in Deir al-Balah, which was targeted and burned, and its occupants burned in front of the eyes of the world. All of us in Gaza are vulnerable to being targeted and killed at any moment. In fact, none of us are afraid of death because life now is more terrible and more terrifying. .

The truth we fear is the path of death to which we may be exposed

please help out!!!!

$54,977 USD raised of $70K goal!

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beaft

my mythology pet peeve is when someone describes a scenario in which they keep nearly getting something and then having it snatched away, and everyone's like "one must imagine sisyphus" no!!! one must imagine TANTALUS!!! sisyphus = being made to perform a pointless, aggravating task over and over without ever making any progress. tantalus = being offered a glorious reward only for it to vanish as soon as you reach for it. they are NOT the same

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cipherhunter
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zwoelffarben

One must imagine Tantalus malding.

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My favourite sentence in the article: “Those interested in acquiring Jones’ media company had submitted their final offers to federal court-appointed trustee Christopher Murray, who was tasked with picking a best bid, but not necessarily the highest.”

That suggests to me that Mr Murray had the option of choosing the funniest bid, and by gum he took it.

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i’m losing my mind

STOP REBLOGGING THIS my phone is glitching an astronomical amount and I immediately knew the culprit was one of my tumblr posts gaining traction

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avatardoggo

oh

GROOVE WITH ME BABY

Ya gotta have

✨⭐️ SOUL ⭐️✨
DONT STOP ME NOW!
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klapollo

Hana-Rawhiti Kareariki Maipi-Clarke, the youngest MP in Aotearoa, starts a haka to protest the first vote on a bill reinterpreting the 1840 Treaty of Waitangi

Goes insanely hard

To provide further context from what I understand the bill wanted to take the rights guaranteed to the Maori in said treaty and expand them to all New Zealand citizens. The issue with that is that it sort of defeats the point of the protections of the treaty.

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