I am the Bard of HeartDive

Gentlemen, which one of us is the most iconic and stylish male disney villain?

what does “men who adhere to strict gender binary” even mean tho

NO ONE adheres to the gender binary! NO ONE FITS THEIR GENDER ROLE PERFECTLY! THAT’S THE POINT! AARRRGGH! 

NOOOOO OOOOONE…. ADHERES TO THE GENDER BINARY LIKE GASTON!

Originally posted by clarabellecow

when I try to hear this in my head my mental voice is incapable of pronouncing it fast enough to fit the timing of the line “noooo oooone… adjksjfksfjslenry like Gaston!”

and when I try to fit it to one of the longer such lines, my mental voice becomes too confused about conflicting scansion to continue

no one’s droll like gaston no one’s swole like gaston no one fits his assigned gender role like gaston

I’m especially fond of the paaaatriaaarchy My what a guy that gastooon

Bless you for making it scan

NOW I CAN’T READ IT WITHOUT SINGING IN MY HEAD

No one’s droll like Gaston, No one’s swole like Gaston, No one fits his assigned gender role like Gaston! For there’s no one online half as phony, His tinder’s got dick pics to spare, You can ask any neckbeard or brony They’ll show you (no homo) whose trilby they’d wear! No one drawls like Gaston Or catcalls like Gaston, Or manspreads on the train in a sprawl like Gaston! I’m especially fond of the paaaatriaaarchy! My what a guy that Gastooon!

…I’m not sorry.