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#i don't even know what happened i tripped and projected onto the bard again – @bamf-jaskier on Tumblr
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Fringilla Appreciation Hours

@bamf-jaskier / bamf-jaskier.tumblr.com

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okay 43 was made for jaskier and yen (and geralt) or 22 for yennskier would be fantastic

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When the battle was over, when the bodies buried and the tale done, that was when Jaskier assumed he would take his leave. Sure, there was mystery still to be solved and a destiny to be hard but -- it felt like his part in the story was over. He was there when Princess Cirilla was possessed but of little help. In many ways Jaskier was a witness alone to the story, unable to help sway the battle one way or another. Then he saw Yennefer, Princess Cirilla, and Geralt all standing together on the ruins of Kaer Morhen, looking like a family and he just knew that there could not possibly be a place for him in this tale.

Jaskier was a scribe by trade and that meant he relayed the story, he was not meant to be in it. He had accepted this fact a long time ago which was why he was happy to be able to call Geralt of Rivia his best friend. It might seem odd that he still considered Geralt his best friend after everything that happened but well...the man did break him out of jail and despite Jaskier being hurt by Geralt's words on that mountain he knew there was a lot of pain behind it. He knew that he pushed Geralt's buttons in a way no one else could and that Jaskier made an easy target at that moment for the Witcher's anger. Geralt had apologized and this point, Jaskier was looking at the man's actions and he did portray himself as apologetic. He was happy with Geralt's renewed presence in his life.

What Jaskier found himself shocked by was Yennefer's addition into in circle of people. When he saw her in that bar, he assumed she would be there for his head not his help. Through their adventure in Oxenfurt the two of them had found a comfortable familiarity that had carried over into their time at Kaer Morhen.

Again, Jaskier had assumed that he would take his leave after the defeat of Voleth Meir, possibly find someone to spend his night with. Instead, when Princess Cirilla, Yennefer, and Geralt came back inside from the cold Geralt gestured Jaskier over.

"Jaskier," Geralt started, "I never got the chance to thank you."

Now the bard was truly taken aback he had never, "Thank me for--" Jaskier said, leaving the sentence hanging.

He was truly confused. Not only had Geralt never thanked him for something before he genuinely couldn't think of a single helpful thing he'd recently done.

"Thank you for bringing Ciri to Kaer Morhen," Geralt continued, "It could not have been an easy journey and with Ciri only partially knowing the way it must have been hectic."

Jaskier felt his face heat up -- hectic had been one word for it. The Princess insisted she knew the path to the Keep and Jaskier hadn't believed her and had tried asking some random villager who of course hadn't known how to get to Kaer Morhen. She also grew quite tired of his insistence on calling her Princess or Princess Cirilla.

"It was no trouble Geralt --- nothing a fabulous Bard wouldn't do for his best friend," Jaskier said with a laugh.

Cirilla clapped her hands, "Ah ha!" She exclaimed to Geralt, "It appears you do have friends outside of these Witchers."

Geralt rolled his eyes, "I suppose I do."

Jaskier felt his heart flutter with Geralt calling him a friend but Yennefer soon spoke up, cutting that feeling short with the fire of possible witty banter ahead.

"I promise you Geralt," Yennefer said, "You could certainly do better than the bard."

Jaskier gestured down his own body, "What could be better in a friend and companion than this witch?"

Her violet gaze looked him up and down, "A better taste in hairstyle for one."

He felt offended and held a hand to his chest, "Hairstyle? I will have you know this is the peak of fashion?"

"In which land? Because it is certainly not on The Continent."

He opened his mouth to retort again only for Ciri to cut in with, "Jaskier since you are clearly a close friend to Geralt...and Yennefer don't you think you ought to call me Ciri? I am tired of the Princess title."

Yennefer scoffed. In any other scenario, Jaskier would continue to stubbornly call her Princess but here -- invoking friendship, well damn.

"If you insist...Cirilla," Jaskier said.

She huffed, "I will take it."

With, Jaskier ended up staying at Kaer Morhen. It was strange, at first, to be in a place so unfamiliar surrounded by people so familiar with you they knew how you liked your tea. As a performer, Jaskier was never in one place for long. He had thousands of acquaintances and few friends but now he was, surrounded by every person who knew him better than he'd like to admit.

Him and Geralt knew how to live with one another. Jaskier would compose and Geralt would quietly sit. Now, however, they had to adjust their dynamic. Geralt had a daughter now. A Partner. Brothers. He was so much...louder, more possessive and aggressive than Jaskier had ever seen him. He laughed if not freely then readily and Jaskier needed to figure out how he should act around this new version of Geralt he was discovering. Now, if Jaskier was to sit and quietly compose, he stood out as the silent one.

For the first week, Jaskier tried following their old routine only to find himself feeling isolated. The straw that broke the camel's back was when Lambert, the asshole, asked why a Bard such as Jaskier was so quiet when he was not performing. Geralt actually laughed at that and told Lambert that Jaskier was one of the most talkative bastards he ever knew.

Jaskier at this point had enough and stood up and turned to Lambert, "You Witcher's ass, I am composing and attempting to be considerate of the group here. Now, in an ideal environment I might be playing or humming along to the tune but out of respect to your oh-so-sensitive hearing I have recused myself those comforts."

He turned and huffed and then Yennefer spoke up from the other end of the table where she was showing Ciri some spell or another, "Jaskier genuinely no one cares if you mumble music in the corner."

He looked over at her, then to Geralt who looked at Jaskier with wide eyes. Geralt was the one after all who had asked Jaskier to stop composing out loud, years ago one night on the path. But it was a new environment, they were shaping their relationship anew.

"With all the noise around here," Geralt said, "it really wouldn't be noticeable."

"Might even make for pleasant background music of these fools," Yennefer said and gave Jaskier a smirk.

His heart stopped. That was a truly dangerous smirk.

That night, when Jaskier was walking in the halls, he came across Yennefer.

Most of the time, when they were in front of others, they liked to snark at each other. It felt like a performance, a show. They became more over the top with every day and it was one of the few opportunities Jaskier had to stretch his wit. When they were alone however, a strange silence would often descend. With no audience, there seemed little purpose to their fights. They felt hollow. What was left between them was a strange sense of debt and gratitude and guilt that Jaskier could never quite figure out the direction of.

He remembered his own words to her in the bar. Her Elven heritage. Being captured. His rescue. My wife....

So yes, while their time with others was upbeat and snarky their time alone was heavier.

Which is why Jaskier bluntly asked Yennefer, "Why did you say that."

She knew exactly what he was referring to, "I felt odd. Seeing you quiet, blending into the background. It wasn't right."

"I don't know what else to do," he admitted, "I was so certain of what my friendship with Geralt looked like and now -- I don't know where I fit in."

"Jaskier," Yennefer said looking into his eyes, "You have the absolutely uncanny ability to make yourself at home in whichever space you choose, invited or not. Don't let your own insecurities hold you back."

He rolled his eyes, "And I assume that you are a master of your insecurities."

"No."

The short answer surprised Jaskier, if nothing else for its honesty.

Yennefer continued, "I find myself constantly fixated on my failings. Voleth Meir, Sodden, betraying Geralt, running away for so long and a million other regrets. I have so many insecurities they could write a Codex on them. The difference between you and me is I don't let them get in the way. If I couldn't move past my fear of being alone with Ciri due to Voleth Meir then the girl would never learn magic. If I constantly fixated on my betrayal of Geralt we wouldn't be together."

While she spoke, tears gathered at the corner of her eyes and now Jaskier was reaching out to her, resting his hands on her cheek, "Yennefer, this isn't healthy, what either of us are doing. I can't seem to move on and you are doing so too quickly. You can't distance yourself from the pain and expect it to go away."

"Says you," Yennefer states, moving away.

"I know I am being hypocritical but -- if you need someone to talk. I can listen."

"You? A listener?" Yennefer said with a light chuckle.

"Hey!" Jaskier said, with a small smile, "I have my moments."

Then, to his surprise, Yennefer hugged him. It was a tight and rapid hug and before he could catch his breath she was moving away leaving only the whispered words in his ear, "Thank you."

"You're welcome," he said surprised at the honesty in his voice.

"I might just take you up on that offer," Yennefer said and then she was gone, going back to her rooms.

He's left there then, trying to think about he's redefining his relationship with Geralt. Meanwhile Geralt is redefining his relationship with Yennefer and Jaskier --- now he's trying to figure out what Yennefer means to him as well. What exactly he thinks of her.

Jaskier was still feeling the lingering pressure of Yennefer's hug on his body, still thinking about the feeling of her breath on his ear --- oh fuck

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